I have a dream......

As the year is relatively fresh and I didn’t make any New Year’s Resolutions, this being MLK and all I decided to do 10 predictions “I have a dream” style in honor of the late reverend. But first:

 

I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in my life as the 341^st most important day of this league’s history, a day that will serve in the memory banks only as another day I spent in the office. I have come to this hallowed webspace to remind all fantasy fanatics of the fierce urgency of Now, a mere seven weeks away from March Madness, deeply entrenched in the fantasy basketball season, the kickoff of the fantasy hockey season, and (gasp) only 3 weeks away from when pitchers and catchers report. This is no time to engage in the luxury of winter hibernation or taking the tranquilizing drug of “watching games without thinking of the fantasy implications.”  Now is the time to make real the promises of dominance. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of mediocrity to the sunlit path of excellence. Now is the time to research for your drafts and band together under the solid rock of sleeper-hood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of the fantasy gods’ children.

And so let fantasy live on from the golden ponds of hockey.

Let fantasy live on from the bracket mania of March Madness (long considered a close cousin of a fantasy leagues).   

Let fantasy live on from the dormant (for now) gridirons of football,

Let fantasy live on from the thawing fields of baseball  

Let fantasy live on from the reverberating hard courts of basketball.

From every fantasy team and fantasy sport, let fantasy live on!

 

(Parts of the previous speech were excerpted from another, less important speech delivered August 28, 1963, by someone not as relevant as Robert Yan. Copyright infringement not intended; all rights reserved).

 

Without further ado, I Have a Dream predictions about this fantasy year:  

1.)    In another wide-open filed of NCAA championship contenders, the modern day Cinderellas of the tournament, Butler and Gonzaga, face off in the Final Four in an epic rematch of their clash on Jan. 19 (Butler won by one point on a buzzer-beater). The Louisville Cardinals, though, win in anti-climatic fashion.

2.)    Kevin Durant becomes the first “Undisputed Fantasy Champion” as the most dominant fantasy player in any fantasy sport for his ridiculous 2012-2013 statistical season, taking over the title from Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, Barry Bonds 2001, and LaDanian Tomlinson 2006.

3.)    At least one significant MLB gets hurt during the World Baseball Classic and is out for an extended period, bringing scrutiny to why the event must take place just before the baseball season and whether MLB teams should let their players participate.

4.)    Adrian Peterson reveals via twitter that he is in fact from Mars and that he was using performance-enhancing Martian food during his epic 2012 fantasy season. Fantasy titles across the nation are revoked, champions are stripped.

5.)    In the Year of the Snake, various big-name fantasy players will betray and disappoint, rewarding owners who invested heavily in them with garbage performances. O wait, that’s every year.

6.)    For the first time in the post-steriods era, baseball actually gets some power hitters as balls (not players) get a bit juicier, many ballparks bring in the fences just a tad, and it’s one of the hottest summers. Not one, not two, but THREE! (gasp!!!) hitters actually break the vaunted 50 HR barrier. (Here’s hoping one or more of those hitters is Josh Hamilton, Mike Trout, and Albert Pujols).

7.)    A backlash ensues from the recent draft QBs early and often ! mantra as fantasy owners (in one-QB leagues, at least) realize they can get great value out of mid-tier QBs Josh Freeman, Tony Romo, etc. and 2^nd-year studs RG III, Andrew Luck, and Russell Wilson rather than have to invest heavily in the Big Three of Brees, Rodgers, and Brady.

8.)    Another fantasy sport comes into focus……….(I would pray for dodgeball but that’s not going to be it). Most likely candidates are golf (if Tiger continues his comeback) or Streak for Cash (lots of these “win a lot in a row” games coming on strong, could be the next great office distraction).

9.)    In a miracle of science, Derrick Rose emerges from the Adrian Peterson martian rehab clinic even better than his previous self, leading the Bulls to dominate the Celtics in the Eastern semis, dethrone “the King” in seven and then topple the Thunder in the finals. I have a dream.

10.)                        On the strength of his new “Fantasyball” strategy, Fantasy guru and brilliant fantasy manager Robert Yan finally wins his fantasy baseball league, the title he has always coveted the most. I have a dream.

 

Fantasize on,

 

Robert Yan

Food

If you wanted a food review or a cookbook post or to see what an Asian twenty-year-old eats, you came to the wrong place. I am not a "food guy," or "foodie,"


Most people, I'd say, could categorize their expenditures in terms of "necessities" and non-necessities. Ordinarily, food would be categorized under "necessities" (like, yea, you have to eat) but food is also one of those that can be ramped up so extraordinarily that it's a luxury or a non-necessity (a $5 plate of food from Ralph's is a lot different financially than a $50 steak dinner at a fancy restaurant). It's a different meal, you might argue, but it's still a meal. You've spent $45 more. Therefore, the way I look it, "enjoying food" can be a luxury non-necessity item, much in line with say, going to the gym, getting a dog, gambling, surfing, any of a list of things that are not necessary.

Food for me is like a daily schedule of activities: I know what I like, I know what's good for me, and I stick with those same things. I also go for the most efficient types of food: non-cooking, on-the-going, in-wrappers, kind of things. I try to stay away as much as possible from fancy dinners, elaborate dining menus, and the one that takes up the most time of all: cooking. O man I do not relish cooking. I haven't spent more than a half hour cooking in my life, and if it were mean I would rather not do so. I'd rather use the 30 minutes to do something more productive, because if time is money, that's money wasted right there. My motto is, "the quicker I can get it, the better it tastes." (that's one of my favorite mottos second only to "My favorite food is free food.")


Top 10 "Efficient" foods.

1.) Banana- perfect healthy food to fill you up and give you energy. Perfect to use about 30 minutes-1 hour before vigorous exercise. Any type of fruit, really.
2.) Sandwich- Open the package, put contents on bread, open mouth, start eating.
3.) milk- packs quite a punch for a liquid.
4.) Pizza- put in the oven, wind the timer, set and forget. I recommend Digiorno's.
5.) Chipotle- perfect stop-by-and get food that's actually relatively freshly made. No long lines, no long waits. I wouldn't buy the stock anymore though, too many copycat companies doing what it does and taking market share.
6.) Hawaiian bread- o man this is great with anything. one of the few types of bread that doesn't require any peanut and butter and jelly or anything, just pick up and eat. Great flavor. Very appropriate when already had a meal but still just need a little something to "get there." This hits the spot.
7.) Chinese mini-treats: there's a whole genre here, I'm talking like lotus buns, sesame rolls, and "jian bins"---- you can make these real quick.
8.) "Whatever's in the fridge at parent's house." Can't go wrong there. Usually well stocked. Full of foods you at least used to like, some that you have nostalgia about.
9.) granola bars, wrappered foods- anything that can sit in the car for 2 weeks and still be good. When in a crunch (get it?) these come in handy.
10.) Noodles/Dumplings: Ok takes a while and you have to actually boil some water (man I get antsy even doing this menial task), but very fulfilling. I only do this once in a while so as to save time. Haha.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Enjoying (Still) Being Young

I came to the realization the other day (with the help of "older" friends) how awesome it is to still be in my mid-twenties. At this stage, I can still manage to do these things that I (probably, but don't count me out) won't be able to do in around 5 years (aka when that magical "big 3-0 birthday) hits:


1.) sleep on command. It's great to be able to fall into bed and just fall asleep. No tossing, turning, no nothing.

2.) Take a trip to Japan on a whim. A little planning and booking flights needed, but really didn't have to answer to anybody, bring anybody along (more under the "I'm still single" benefits list, but that comes with the "being young" package, I guess.

3.) Run everyday. Still could do this later, but at a higher opportunity cost (of doing other things like spending times with kids, let's say)

4.) Being active in dodgeball. It's one thing to move around and throw, but getting low to the ground and diving on to the floor to make catches: that's a different story. Elbows, knees, and other body parts will NOT be happy later on.

5.) Driving with complete coordination. Hand-eye coordination, how I enjoy you now and how I miss you. That said, I just got into a (very minor) accident the other day, but really generally being able to see all around naturally and follow your movements over are

6.) Eat whatever......I've always got the safety blanket that whatever I eat (as unhealthy and fatty as it may be) I can always burn it off later.

7.) Watch football on Sundays with "the guys" (and play fantasy football).......Who am I kidding I'm never giving this up.

8.) Being able to make fun of older people........yea even now doing this feels weird because you know one day you're going to be one of those people (if you're lucky).

9.) Healing from a cut quickly.........the other day I very stupidly reached into my bag where I had left a shaving razor and cut my hand on it, making a suprisingly deep cut on my middle finger and losing some blood. It healed in about 24 hours and I have no more pain. I've always said I'm kind of like Wolverine in that department, but even Logan's got to lose his healing powers as he gets older, right?

10.) Make some bad decisions. When you're young, you can take risks. And taking risks sometimes means making bad decisions. Those are Ok when you're young cuz you learn from them. You don't get that luxury when you're older. Make those mistakes now, Robert, and learn, LEARN!!!!

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Getting Back in the Flow

Seems I've missed out on a year of news stories. And being as this is the last month of the year and the time when all the "Top Things of 2012" come out including "Top News Stories of 2012," etc., it's time to recap all the stories in order of what I think are the top news stories, as well as questions I ask that show how uninformed I am, but may be on the minds of the typical American/ fantasy sports blogger.




Greece on brink of financial meltdown: My question is, how did Greece get this way? And why is it Greece? Not like Germany, with a history of economic stagflation and catastrophic events? Or Russia, with its transition from a socialist to capitalistic society? No, Greece.....a country known more for its rich history and mythological gods and creatures. Not even sure who the president/leader of Greece is, but certainly whoever it is hasn't done enough to be famous as the butt of jokes for all international economic study. What's going on, Greece?

Hacktivists: Don't these people have anything else to do with their lives? Like getting a real job? I am not a fan of the fact that these hackers are considered "cool" or "hipster."

Hurricane Sandy: That's tough. Just saw "Twister"  and realize the extent of damage storms can cause. Different storm, but that must have been an unbearable week. I've so far dodged all weather-related catastrohies in the U.S. for the last 20 years........can I keep dodging these bullets?

Batman shooting: Every year there's random acts of violence like this: See school shootings, Gabrielle Giffords shooting in Arizona, this. Makes me wonder about gun control, especially deadly assault weapons. He wouldn't have killed 12 people and wounded 58 others if he just had a pistol. Also, I know the pool of U.S. citizens is huge, but is there any way to monitor and control the crazies. Probably futile, but we're all at risk because of a few of these people.

Jerry Sandusky: This year's Casey Anthony trial, except a lot more insidious. My prediction that more child molestation stories would come out came true, but on a much lower scale (fortunately). Sandusky was the head of the beast, and it was ugly. May that stuff never happen again.

U.S. Presidential Election: 
One where the media probably made the election closer than it seemed. According the media, the race was down to the wire. According to the media, Ohio, Florida, Pennsylvania, Colorado, and any number of swing states were in play. According to the media, election night was supposed to be tense, and may not have been decided for many weeks. And then election night came......much like a heavily hyped Sunday Night Football game, the election got one-sided really quickly and suddenly, Ohio was projected for Obama, Pennsylvania was projected for Obama, and then about an hour and a half into the election coverage, Obama was projected to be the winner. As I expected all along. Like a lot of commentators stated, the bottom line is, the incumbent has an advantage, especially one as charismatic and sophisticated (at the same time! Wow!) as Obama, who's one of the country's biggest celebrities at this point, and his exquisite handling of foreign policy was sufficient to overcome the problems with economic deficiencies (rightly or wrongly attributed to the President). O and Mitt Romney was just not strong enough of a candidate.

What's actually more important are the local elections, actually. Your vote actually matters (especially for people in California, let's say) and they much more directly affect you. As a guy who has never voted before, I resolve to vote in the next election (no matter where I am) if only for the local (and state) politics.

Lessons from Japan, Part II

11.) No matter what, no matter where you are, no matter what time of the day it is, be at a computer with internet access 15 minutes before 10:00AM Pacific time on Sunday morning. You never know what might happen right before the first NFL games kickoff, especially for fantasy football. I personally braved the langugage gap and the deepest of nights in god-knows-where Japan at 3:00AM to set my lineup. Lesson here: fantasy football comes first. 

12.) Here's an idea: a monkey park where anyone can come and see about 2 hundred monkeys in their natural habitat, as well as get peanuts/fruit/chips to give to the monkeys in an enclosed area to get the experience of "feeding the animals." Also included: a very scenic view of an entire city whence you just came. Good idea or bad idea? Well, this worked n Kyoto, Japan.......probably the highlight of my trip, feeding monkeys and watching them mess with each other/scratch their behinds/urinate freely while getting a great glimpse of the whole expanse of the second largest city in Japan. 

Picture that same monkey park.......in Los Angeles, CA. Up high, somewhere around Griffith Observatory or right near the Getty Center. I think it'd work. 

13.) Don't go to Himeji castle: not open after 4:00PM, far out of the way of anything, main building not open until 2015. Jus check it out on the internet or something. 

14.) Take out all the money you think you mae at the beginning of the trip, at the airport. The currency exchange process is unnecessarily difficult, in my opinion. I had to go to a post office, give my name, my passport, social security number, life savings deposit, favorite color, etc., etc..........just not a great experience; it was like I was checking into prison or applying for a heart transplant. Guys, it's real simple, I give you $100 American dollars, you give me 8000 Yen, minus a little for your commission. I'm not trying to rip you guy off or anything, seriously. 

15.) It's probably me, but I LOOOOOOVVVEEEE getting on a train right before it closes its doors and get off. Knowing that I JUST made it it somewhere really excites me. Like I got away with highway robbery. All right it's definitely just me. Plus, half the time I realize I'm not even on the right train. 

16.) But that leads to my next point: you can afford to get on a train without knowing exactly which one it is, or go towards a shrine without knowing where it is, try a new food you've never heard of before, or talk to someone with the proper training in Japanese.....you can afford to take risks. If you ge off or on the wrong train, you can always take the next train, arriving 5 or 7 minutes later (even in the reverse direction). If you go towards the wrong shrine, that shrine could be just as beautiful. If you talk to one Japanese person and they just stare at you with a blank look, you can just ask someone else. Doesn't hurt to try new things. 

17.) Japan is PRECISE: the gardens are managed precisely, the trains run on time, the Japanese language is spoken with precision. No shortcuts or unfinished jobs in this country, they know what they're doing. 

18.) Another idea based on animals: a city fully devoted to the deer, who is a holy messenger and considered an honored guest of the city. Deer roam all around the city; people, buses, and cars all have to stop for them. Tourists come from all around to see them; they go to tourists whom they know have food and want to feed them. GREAT IDEA! Imagine if you're a city like Milwaukee, you don't have much tourism, you're not really known for anything, and you have a sports franchise named the bucks. Get a city permit for the deer, avoid animal strict liability lawsuits, ship 1000 deer from like the Minnesota backwoods, cut off horns of the males to make sure they don't gore somebody, and have a great home court advantage for all Bucks games. The advertising campaign is already made: "Fear the Deer." TNT cutaways to the deer munching on grass outside the stadium. If you're Milwaukee, why WOULDN'T you do that? This message was approved by Robert, running for mayor of Milwaukee 2020. 

19.) NEVER take the Kodama train. It's technically a "Shinkansen" line meaning it's a "bullet train" and should go really fast, but I really wanted to just take a bullet and apply it to myself, cuz it stops at each station and is parked a LONG time at each of those stations. As if people don't have somewhere to be. Take the Hikari or Sakura instead if you have a JR pass. 

20.) Have fun. Don't stress about money, schedule, language, food, and (definitely not) work during vacation. Take a vacation. Especially now that I'm a "responsible adult" and realize how rare vacations come along, I value these things a lot more. Fantasize about something: fantasize about living in a foreign country, living a different lifestyle, being a different person. Lose yourself. 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan. 

The movie gluttony 2012

On my way to and from Japan, I watched exactly 10 movies, of varying qualities. Btw, Korean Airlines, for having tickets available for $800+ to Japan round-trip, has nice service, including a nice selection of movies, and up-to-date, a lot of 2012 hits and new releases. I tried to select a wide array of releases, genres, and actors/actresses. This is NOT including the 5 minutes I gave "Out of Africa" (couldn't bear with it) or "The Life of Timothy Green" that I literally fell asleep through. I honestly gave these movies an honest viewing and neutral mindset going in, not what I usually do, which is try to watch a movie while doing other things. I also hadn't seen the IMDB ratings for these movies, so

Watching 10 movies (4 on the way over there, 6 on the way back) has its percs: you've really got nothing else to do: reading gets boring after awhile, sleeping requires being in the right state, and and daydreaming is only exciting for so long. You get small screen, the screen can move depending on the person in front of you, and the headphone quality can get spotty, and the captain always wants to interrupt you with the completely extraneous news that "Hey we hit turbulence again!" I mean, what else are you going to do when sitting in the middle seat of a double-digit hour flight in economy class, with no legroom, poor lighting, and no access to the internet? the airplane movie probably was one of the best inventions in airplane-related history; it's like the the armchair sofa to the TV.

Without further ado, here are my top 10 movies that I saw, in order from worst to first:

10.) Seeking a Friend for the End of the World - seriously, what was this? Besides being completely unbelievable even at the end of the world that a 55-year-old boring dude whose wife just left him would fall in love with a 28-year-old hyppy woman within about 36 hours, this a character development movie that had Steve Carell and Kiera Nightly being the wrong characters. And unlike the other cruddy movies on this list, it didn't have any comedy or action to even salvage it. It's like right before one of your friends is about to make a horrible decision and you just wanna yell, NO!!! NO!!!!....that's what I wanted to tell the producers when they decided to make this movie. I wholly wish I could have had my 90 minutes back. (Rotten Tomatoes 55%- they had an extra 5 in there).
9.) Men in Black III - you'd think with all those years in between and the "Back in Time" storyline it'd be good, especially as a 3rd movie in a franchise, but this was really just bad. I coulda sniffed the plot a mile away, no love interest for either J or K, the time travel thing had more holes in it than Spongebob Squarepants. Wasn't there a time when Men in Black was good to watch? Maybe that was just me as a kid liking all movies (Rotten Tomatos 69%- woulda went MUCH lower)
8.) The Watch - was barely watchable. Ben Stiller and Vince Vaugh not funny, Jonah Hill kinda funny but not enough to salvage it. Once the aliens started popping up, the plane ride and this movie mercifully ended. (17%- about right, maybe a little higher for a tad of comedic value if you were in a lonely, lonely place and needed something, anything)
7.) Snow White and the Huntsman
- This got really weird to me, and half the time I kept thinking how Charlize Theron looked worse than she did in Monster, Kristin Stewart is just in some bad movies, and why there's like talking birds and mass violence in this Snow White story I used to know. Manageable with a bit of intrigue, but it's like a butterless piece of undercooked toast......you can do better.  (Rotten Tomatoes: 49%- I'd have went lower)
6.) Brave - seriously one of the worst Disney movies I've ever seen, and that's a euphemistic insult (the opposite of a backhanded compliment) in the sense that I at least grouped it as a Disney movie (commonly known as instant classics the second they came out). This was not. I couldn't feel any empathy for the main character (bad sign), the Scottish accents were horrible, and nothing was even solved. And there wasn't really even a villain!!!!!! No wonder Brave, for all the hype going in, got no pub after it came out. Disney/Pixar probably just wants to pretend that one never came out and start publicizing the next one.
Note: Instantly regretted not seeing Ice Age 3, which was also available as my "cartoon flick". (Rotten Tomatoes 78%- I woulda went MUCH lower)
5.) Safe -at this point watching a Jason Statham movie is like going to the zoo: You know you're gonna get a bit of excitement, you know exactly which roads to take and plot twists you're gonna get, but you go anyway and you still get some pleasure out of it. And there was a bit of a plot here, not great but made you watch.(Rotten Tomatos 57%- about right, a very bread-and-butter formula for mild success movie)
4.) Celeste and Jesse Forever (Rotten Tomatoes 70%)- also another one that Rotten Tomatoes got about right. Interesting stories, very believable (including the artsy-guy-has-awesome girlfriend and good looks but-doesn't-wanna-get-a-job part) that isn't heartbreaking but good enough to get me a glimpse of another lifestyle and all the rough edges of living out life. I'll say that it was a very interesting ending given the name of the movie, but like many good movies it wasn't about the ending, it was how they got there).
3.) The Amazing SpiderMan (Rotten Tomatoes -73%).... once again, Rotten Tomatoes, spot on. 20 minutes in I realized I knew the exact plot of this movie having seen the cartoons and Doc Croc (they called him the Lizard, which is just factually inaccurate but I'll live), but the movie still was pretty good, which is a good sign. Seems like the start of a great franchise with a better (than Tobey McGuire as Spiderman and the That-70's-guy guy as Green Goblin) Spiderman.
2.) Ted- great. Lots of toilet humor, sexual humor, crude humor to the point of being excessive, but that just made it excessively funny. Exactly what I was looking for to start off my trip to Japan, a laugh-out-loud comedy with at least one hot chick (Mila Kunis never disappoints, although there were some lookers amongst the co-workers). (69%- the movie was better than that, America's just a bunch of haters on this movie.....a great comedy and a great lesson on growing up).
1.) Safety Not Guaranteed- accidentally clicked on this just searching desperately for a good movie after having endured through Brave. No. 1 choice and boy was this movie a surprise. It wasn't a great start, and there were parts I was plenty confused about and "where is this going?" but the ending was just great and just tied everything up before that, one of the better endings I've seen for a long time that made me going "Wow" at the end of it. I'll say that it's a movie about believing, about trying something new, and a little laughter and romance in between. It's somewhat a movie about time travel, and it handled it miles better than Men in Black did: it built it up, it gave reasons for the time travel, it made the time travel realistic in terms of real life, "Can this time travel thing actually happen?" Absolutely smart and well put-together, you actually feel smarter coming out of it (unlike many of the movies on this list). Just like the theme of the movie, it made you consider trying new things again and taking a chance on things (and people). Can't recommend it more highly.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Lessons from Japan, Part I

Just came storming back from a trip to Japan...Tokyo, Kyoto, Nara, Hiroshima, Osaka, Narita, the little sushi stand at the train station in Himeji....you name it, I went there. A whirlwind of a trip (not of the hurricane or tsunami kind) and left quite an impression. Not really, unless you count the number of Japanese natives who were frustrated and impatiently waiting while I tried to understand what they ere saying or showing my inability to conjure up basic Japanese greetings and phrases.

Anyway, here are some life lessons when visiting Japan:

1.) Stay to the Left! Like the little-known and less-remembered Rihanna hit "To the left, to the left," that's what you should be singing to yourself walking (or driving) in the streets of Japan. Can't tell you how unnatural it felt to do so, fighting my every instinct, as well as how many times I almost collided with an incoming stranger because he (rightly) went left and I (not rightly) went right. (See what I did there?) That should be in every traveler's manual and tourbook about Japan. It's irresponsible not to.

2.) Sewer systems in Japan leave something to be desired. First night in Tokyo, big downpour. My Nike shoes were not well-equipped, but the real problem was the puddliness on the streets of Tokyo. I didn't see sewers or gutters anywhere. One would almost think they're not well-suited to handle water!


3.) Flip a coin when you have to talk to a random Japanese person..........about a 50% chance that person will know English and be able to converse. Relatively good odds, I'd say, for a non-European/Australian country with no history of being dominated by an English-speaking culture.

4.) Most toilets (the ones that aren't just squat-and-go, i.e. just a pit) have a Japanese symbol that means "big" and another one that means "little." Not sure about what that meant, but I have some ideas. I think it has to do with how much water is needed for flushing, if you get my "drift."

5.) unlike a lot of places I've been too (many of them in China), it smells......neutral.

6.) Subways are Amaaaaaaaaaaazing. L.A. city developers, here are tickets to Tokyo, Japan....please go through the subway system and learn from the efficiency and convenience of that city. The subways get anyone from anywhere to anywhere else, and fast.......the trains run on time, there are a lot of them, and Los Angeles needs them. NOW.

6a) Subway stations are its own little city. They have food, internet cafes, etc.... even its own map in case you get lost within the station (which I did). Quick traveler's tip: If you don't know where your hotel is yet and need to drop your luggage off somewhere quick, use the "coin lockers" at subway stations so you can just explore a city and then get out quick-like.

7.) Shin- (insert city here in Japan) is NOT the same as (insert city here). Don't make the same mistake I did and wind up in the wrong city altogether and 2 subway lines away from where I wanted to be. Not a pleasant experience.


8.) Shhhhhhh......don't talk on the trains!!!!! In fact, don't talk to anybody anywhere, is the general vibe I get. Not very communicative, except for the tourist-industry people.

9.) Sumo wrestling: Yea, not the most inventive sport ever invented. It's like when a little kid gets their first pair of monster truck toys and mashes them together to see which one will win.....it's really just brute force, in my opinion. Also, it's like horse racing or MMA fight: a LOT of build-up for not much action. The "wrestlers" throw salt around, prance around, and do the crowd favorite move (apparently): slap their naked abdominal area. The crowd cheers. O, and what's that about collusion and fixed matches? Yea, definitely rumors of that.

9a) And how do the wrestlers get so humongous? Most of the people in Japan are, for a lack of a better word, shrimpy, definitely not wide or fatty. And that's because of the food........there's just not a lot of it .They eat delicate, they eat exquisite, they eat seafood. They don't eat fatty, they don't eat a lot (judging by the amount of food I received every time I bought udon noodles.

10.) I wonder sometimes if a Japanese speaker, knowing that a tourist doesn't know a lick of Japanese and having been adequately provoked, just says "screw you" to that tourist. Can't believe that's never happened, certainly I gave enough reason to.

11.) Lot of "Hai's" meaning yes. No, thy're not saying hi to you, and you saying "hai" to them is just the equivalent of going around to everyone saying "Yes," "Yes," "Yes" to everything. The epitome of a Yes Man.