Losing on Your Home Court

You know that feeling of “I’m supposed to know this stuff, but I just don’t?” Or, “I’m supposed to be good at this, but I’m really doing quite poorly?” That’s losing on your home court. I do it all the time. I’m fine with losing at certain things, like poetry, or art history, or 1970’s musical hits. But if I lose at the things I’m supposed to be good at, like finance, law, fantasy baseball, Chinese, or counseling kids, I am really disappointed in myself.

Which is why I’m so disappointed that I’ve lost at stocks. It’s basically been a wasted year on my etrade accounts: I started at 69 with John Deere Stock in October and rode it until it hit 95, then sold and then inexplicably bought back in at 93…….and watched it go back down the hill and now hit 67 (With no signs of hitting the brakes) Wow. What a roller coaster. (And a financial disaster). How did I do so poorly here? For a guy who claims to be “good at picking stocks,” I truly messed up here. I feel like a fraud; like everything I ever believed in was a lie, like I need to re-evaluate a lot of things; like my life is not as promising as it was; like I’ved peaked; like the future is really uncertain. Sigh.

Living in the Wrong Era

Speaking of the equity markets, what is going on here? Another recession? Geez, my resilience just can’t take it anymore. Going through this economy really makes me feel like I missed the boat. As lucky as I have it, growing up in an relatively affluent family that benefited from the 90’s boom and America’s prosperity in the late 90’s and being part of a 2-parent household, I can’t help but wonder how different things would have been if I had grown up say 10, 20 years ago. If I had entered the workforce around 1995: when all stocks were going up, economy was BOOMING, or in 2001, just after the back-to-back Enron and 9-11 crisis, when America was slowly recovering, or even in 2005, when the housing markets were at its best. I grow up in any of those economies, I’d have a steady job, be solidly in Corporate America, be primed for a very productive string of years in my twenties. (Especially in a Corporate Law department for any big AmLaw law firm). Yet I to come of age in the worst economic climate America has witnessed in the last century or so…….The Great Recession followed by what’s looking like ANOTHER recession of the double-dip variety…..reports of 20-somethings still living with their parents, difficulty obtaining entry-level employment, jobs becoming more and more scarce, stubborn unemployment, and a worsening outlook on the American economy. Sorry, sounds like a huge whine-fest and pity party, but there it is: I really feel like I’m a victim of the times. Bottom line is , I’m a guy just trying to make it in this world, and these times are making it hard on a fella.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

What would I do if were a millionaire

It's weird: When you're in the midst of a VERY busy period, like studying for the bar...all you think about is how much you hate it, what you would be rather doing, how much more efficiently you could be spending your time, how much alcohol you will drink after it's all over (not suggested for readers under 21 years of age; drink responsibly).....

But once you've gotten over that period in your life, oddly you miss things about that time, like the single-mindedness of your efforts, how much you felt like you learned in a day, the sense of achievement....

Eh, who am I kidding. I would rather be on vacation all the time.

Makes me wonder, though, what I would do if money wasn't an issue anymore, I had all the money I needed for the rest of my life.....a very common thought for a lot of folks, not usually a realistic concern for most. Some say they would actually just...go back to work. I say, yes, that might be true for some lucky folks who really enjoy their work and they stumbled into a profession that they're really passionate about, but I don't think that's the case for the vast majority of people. Having never really worked for more than 3 months consecutively at a full-time job, I can't say for certain what I would do.

1. Pro bono legal work: Yea, I could see myself doing this for awhile. Lots of people in need of free legal advice, attorney services who can't afford it. But dunno if it would be a lifelong pursuit.

2. Baseball stadium trip: all 30 MLB stadiums. That'd be exciting, but it'd last for.....like a month.

3. Travel: sure, sure, standard. But that'd get old after probably a year, right?

4. Alternative Spring Break: Ah, yes, here I think I've touched on something: I've done Alternative Spring Break since college began (traveled to faraway places like Seattle, Florida, and Virginia), and I gotta say it's one of the best experiences ANYONE can have. Hands down. I'm pretty sure I would never get tired of Alternative Spring Break because a.) issues are all different....each trip has a different purpose in mind, whether it's children in crime-ridden areas, children with disabilities, environmental aid, etc., etc. b.) you meet lots of great people on each trip...all peers who also have volunteering on their minds...and c.) it really actually makes an impact....you feel like your reachign out to others, as well as doing great things for your self-development. I'd love it.

So yes, 50 Alternative Spring Break trips in 50 weeks (maybe in 50 different states too?) Yes, my idea is motivated by Daniel Seddiqui's 50 jobs in 50 states, but it's really just a good thing to do.

Now if I can only accomplish the first part, of attaining as much money as I could ever need.....

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Greetings from Alaska!!

Yes, I know, I know....long time, long time.

Since last time I wrote (wow, more than a month ago, July 5) a LOT has happened. Let's run it down:

1. 3 more weeks of studying for the bar. Grueling process, do not wish it on my worst enemy. The stress, the 12-hour-days, the practice essays, it was rough. Please, please, PLEASE let me pass!!!!

2. Taking the bar itself. 3 full days, an endurance competition. Basically, 6 full-length law school exams, except all packed into a stretch of 3 days, one after the other. I felt uneasy on some of the essays, rebounded with the multiple choice, and if there was any doubt, I think I salvaged myself on the performance tests. Overconfidence won't affect my score now that the test is over, so I'll say I'm fairly certain I passed, but that doesn't mean I won't be opening my results on Nov. 18th with baited breath.

3. The stock market crashed. Sigh. All those impressive gains I achieved over the past several months, all down the drain. The federal government had a debt crisis and ALMOST defaulted on its loan, which would have been a global disaster. The equity markets responded accordingly by nosediving. Portfolios around the world are hating life right now, including mine ( Why didn't I just stick with Chiptle and Amazon? --- those 2 down but still holding pretty strong).

4. I achieved a W17 streak on Streak for Cash, 2 short of getting $50,000. Kicking myself so hard, although the 17-gamer was no joke and feel proud of myself, also realize I got super-duper lucky just to get that far. Still, the soccer match between Columbia v. Peru (a.k.a. my streakbreaker game) will forever haunt my memories. Columbia should have scored like 7 different times that game, missed a penalty kick, and hit the post twice. URRRRRGGGG!!!!

5. Disastrous month of July saw my fantasy baseball team go 19 games under .500 and currently out of a playoff spot. Murphy's law: anything that could go wrong did go wrong for me (actually, one of the bright spots of the month was picking up Daniel Murphy, who hits everything). Frustrating, to say the least.

6. Dodgeball team riding strong, winning 3 in a row to roll into the playoffs and then won our opening-round playoff match, but now it might be naught because......

7. I'm in Alaska for a week. Post-bar trip with the parents because I'm poor, I don't have a girlfriend to go on a romantic trip with, and I needed to get away. Living in an RV with my parents in blustery, windy Alaska in the middle of summer....... yea, it's the high life.

8. Big Brother stinks. I now see how blinded I was by my eagerness to get on the show....looking at it neutrally now, it's really not even that great of a show and really depends on the casting. Big Brother 11 looking like a perfect storm of great characters coming together....prospects for 12 and beyond look bleak.

9. Reading "50 jobs in 50 states" by Daniel Seddiqui....yea you might remember him, the guy who went around the country doing odd jobs representing those states over the course of a year. I'm more impressed by his story now that I know more about it. He was at an absolute low point in his life: jobless out of college, living with his parents, unsuccessful interviews, no girlfriend (very similar to my situation, by the way) but came up with an original, creative, sustainable, cost-effective idea that propelled him to national prominence and a slice of the history books, and plenty of supporters. Truly, it's a real-life success story that has me pumped up about the future: it IS possible in the world to do something like what Mr. Seddiqui did, to do something that he truly wanted to do and achieve success.
O yea, I also realized it was NOT easy for him to do what he did. Driving across the country by himself, waking up at 4 in the morning to book future jobs in other states, calling all kinds of people and being rejected MANY, MANY times. Sounds like a lot of perseverance was needed, something not everyone possesses. Well done, Dan. And good book.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Buy Chipotle Stock Part 2

Studying for the bar but have to rant about this:

SO upset with my parents about hanging on to RIMM stock, which is down to like 28 and still going lower. In the last year, it's lost 200% of its value, going from 70 to 28. In the meantime, Chipotle has gone from 200 to 320 as of today.

If you would have asked me a year ago which of those 2 stocks I wanted to own, without hesitation, I would have said Chipotle. Immediately. Gosh, I wish my mom would just LISTEN for once.

My recommendation: If I had money, KEEP BUYING Chipotle Stock. This thing's not going anywhere fast, guys. Welcome to the 2010-2020 Decade Food Giant.

Also, buy DE on the low. It took a dive earlier this year when I bought at 93, but now it should be back on the downswing and you have the benefit of my mistake to know it will now rebound. Also, sell NKE until it goes back under 90, then buy it again once it reaches a reasonable low. Seriously, I've made money through 90 twice using this method.

O and lovin' Amazon.

2nd half of the year? Looking good, but there's gonna be some dips, try to sell at the market's most exuberant cuz it's never gonna go in one direction for more than a month; Do the choppy stuff, do your due diligence and make money. Lol.

Ok, back to strict liability crimes, balancing of hardships, and Ultra Vires activity in corporations.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Graduation

For all students who are graduating from grade school, middle school, high school, college, or even law/medical/some sort of graduate school, congratulations. You made it. Obviously, lotsa people have great things to say about graduation; my words are far from the most articulate nor meaningful. However, the fact remains that graduating from ANY school is an accomplishment itself: it means you applied yourself, went through the rigorous curriculum of an accredited school system. Having gone through many school systems and graduated many times now, I know: graduating from a school is the end of an era, the end of a period of your life. Your life will basically never be the same. You won't do a lot of the things in your life again: you won't take that same route to the school anymore, you won't use your locker anymore, you won't go to Professor X's class anymore, you won't be a (high school, college, grad, whatever you are) student anymore.

But along with the end of an era, comes something much better: new opportunity. The start of a new era, a chance to do something great with the rewards you earned through getting through school. They say that after high school is when your life really begins: you leave your old friends, you go to college, you leave the home you grew up in, etc.......So for many students everywhere, this is where your life really begins. Enjoy.


Inevitably after getting through a school year, summer ensues. Some people go on to work interesting summer jobs; some go abroad; some take EXTRA summer classes; some take the summer off. High school graduates in China go on to take the biggest exam of the their lives: The college entrance exam.

For me, it's BarBri. (Studying for the California Bar).

BarBri's been going on for 3 weeks now. Spirit Waning. Mind tiring. Endurance deteriorating. Body weak. My team is all gone. Don't know how long I can continue doing this. Running out of air. Living on bare biscuits. It's only a matter of time now

.....Haha, not actually that bad, not the Armageddon end of days I described, but BarBri is definitely taking a toll.

I know I'm nervous about the test when I read BarBri outlines while I'm eating... A lawyer friend of mine said she thinks about certain topics on her runs, so I might have to do that. And when July comes around, it's really gonna be pressure-cooker time. Sigh. I have just begun to fight.

Fortunately (or not), my roommate has the MLB Extra Innings Mix, so i put that on mute, study my notecards, motivates me to sit down. But it also distracts me. I miss going to the gym, I miss going outside, I miss doing the normal things in life.....that part of my life has ended; BarBri is my life now.


Subject I feel worst about? Contracts. Lotta stuff I didn't learn. Subject I feel best about? Evidence. I'm on top of that. Does it matter? Not really..all you need to do is pass.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

National Spelling Bee Finals

Finally, in Round 9, we got some really tough words. They’re really getting away from commonly-seen words now…..this is getting into the nethworld, the outer limits of the english language.

First time Sriram Hathwar seemed like he was a little troubled, but no problem.


This Arvind guy has been very unheralded by me today, but he’s a contender, man. He really is. Can’t tell if he’s more prepared than Sriram Hathwar, but they’re both REALLY good.


This bee has played out very much as expected, something I couldn’t say for the last 2 years. I’d say that’s actually an indication of good work by the bee: narrowing it down to the very best spellers. For me, the casual viewer, it actually DOES seem like the rounds are getting progressively harder. Early on some random easy words, but none in Round 9 here. This is getting REALLY hard.

Quick work of “schokker” by Joanna Ye. O man. Sukyana Roy and Joanna Ye might be sitting next to each other at the end of this night. I see this final in 3 pairs: Team Canada (Newcombe-Penny), Team New York (Sriram-Hathwar) , and Team Older Girls (Joanna Ye- Sukyana Roy)


When your favorite comes up, your heart beats a bit faster. You’re nervous too. Doesn’t help that she’s always the first speller up.

It’s a numbers game: You’re on a train full of familiar faces, but eventually you meet a word you haven’t met before. Nothing to be ashamed of,


Dakota Jones smiles like he’s got it, he seems like he’s got it, his mom’s worried but he’s got it. Looking a little lonely at the end of that bench over there. Dakota from Vegas is the wild card. The green on the roulette table, if you will.

Sriram on the brink again……Is this it? He’s stumbling….yes. He’ll be disappointed, but upon further reflection, he’ll be there. Whoosh. He gone!!!! Wow the Hathwar train gets derailed.
So I guess the Arvind Express > Sriram Subway this year at least. Arvind moving on..he sounded confident.

Sum YELL or sum yell? L-o- l………

Dakota Jones doesn’t laugh when he thinks something’s funny, he laughs when he thinks he’s found out what the word is.

….and at this point my DVR cut out, with Dakota Jones getting knocked out in Round 15, and then Arvind and then Joanna bowing out in Round 180. Well, it felt like 180, it was more like 180. I had to find out later that Sukyana defeated Laura in what seemed like triple-triple Overtime.


A National Spelling Bee for the ages, I would say. I don’t know if it was cuz of the new facilities, the new TV arrangement with ESPN, the quality of the spellers, whatever, but this year’s spelling bee was really intense and satisfying, dramatic…..and hard. The spellers really got to show off their abilities to spell some hard, hard words in front of a national television audience.

In reflection, that’s what I like about the National Spelling Bee. I’ve had to fend off a lot of half-hearted jokes about why I like watching young kids spelling words ( suggesting that I have a tendancy for pedophilia, no doubt), but I like it because it rewards some really ambitious, intelligent, and motivated kids to show off their abilities and let their hard work finally bear fruit. After hours and hours of preparation and memorization and strategy games, you finally get to use some of that hard work and spell in front of people, say, “HA! I worked damn hard to know that word, and now I got it on national TV.” That has to be a great feeling for a kid, to know that you’re capable of something big, something beyond just yourself. That’s what the National Spelling Bee allows kids to do, and I love it for that.

Plus, I love some of the great stories that the Spelling Bee brings in every year. Sure, most kids have similar interests and hobbies like music, some kind of sport, a favorite word, a favorite movie star or sports star, but you realize from the diversity of geographic regions that these kids are from how many kids around the country are prepping for the national spelling, representing their respective cities and states. Just this year we had a kid from Las Vegas (Dakota Jones) competing against a girl from Ontario, Canada (Laura Newcombe) competing against a girl living right outside of Disney World (Grace Remmer) competing against kids form the Big Apple (Arvind) competing against a Midwest girl from the Land of Ten Thousand Lakes (Anna-Beth Swoap). They all live in their own little world, their own little bubble, but they come together every year to compete and represent their areas as well as themselves. Great event, the Spelling Bee is, and I hope it continues for the foreseeable future.

Btw, how do I feel about Sukyana Roy winning the National Spelling Bee? Congrats……I knew it was possible, and after watching her during the semifinals and early in the Finals I dare say I knew it was probable. I was rooting for Laura Newcombe all the way, and she did great too and could have easily won too, but like every year, I think the winner is the winner for a reason, there are no fluke winners. Congrats, Sukyana Roy, you go down in Spelling Bee history and have a great future ahead of you. As for Laura Newcombe, this was her last year, but she’ll go down in spelling history as one of the more entertaining, charismatic, and memorable non-winners, maybe spellers, of all time. After the end of what I like to call the “Shivashankar Era” in 2009, Laura Newcombe really defined 2010 and 2011 for the National Spelling Bee.

Quick look forward to 2012?

Man we are going to have a PACKED field of favorites next year with some legit claim to being the top dog. We got Nicholas Rushlow who should come back as a 5-year repeater, first time we’ve had one in a while, we got the surprise-out-of-nowhere Dhivya Murugan from Denver, and some dark-horses in the field that we gotta watch out for. But the 2 co-favorites next year will almost certainly be, IMO, the 2 boys from New York, “The Arvind Express” v. “The Sriram Shuttle,” get out of their way cuz they’re coming through. Until next year, spelling bee!!!!!!

Spelling Bee Semifinals Coverage

Spelling bee comments

Snigdha: spellers from San Diego are always good, always dangerous. Always in the semifinals.

Yo, Paul Loeffler, Anna Newcombe, JUST a contender?

Think it’s interesting that Veronica and Laura not acknowledging each other at all……..
Smile, guys, smile.

Ahh, good work, Disney, commercial within the TV show itself for Disneyworld. Well played for Grace Remmer’s intro.

Not a big fan of the new music. Not a big fan of the new stage. Big fan of the trophy that these spellers get. That’s legit.

This Sriram Hathwar kid might not win this year, but if he wants, he can win in 1 or 2 years. If you’ve been spelling competitively since 3rd grade, you know A LOT of words.

Consider this a “warm-up round” for the contestants.

“Cicerone” may be the easiest of words in a round of fairly easy rounds, for a national spelling bee semifinal, that is. NOT tat easy.

Round 4 is all about anticipating the treachery that will come in round 5: Just when you think you’re safe, they pull you back in!!!! Seriously, though, the real action comes in Round 5 or later, for sure….that’s when you show ‘em what you’re made of. Expect lots of hard words, lots of time deliberating, lot of disappointment….just sayin’.

This Samuel Estep kid EXACTLY like Dr. Jacques Bailley! Uncanny resemblance.

Anna Newcome turning into the Rock? - using the People’s eyebrow. Awesome rooting, Lauara Newcombe.

Dude, Veronica Penny is SO nervous right now. Smile, breathe!!!!
Mom’s ALSO not smiling…..Geez.

Man, what did I say about Angela Beth Swoap? Maturity…….could be a dark horse here!!!!!

“conteur” for Connor…….seems like you could just guess that. Am I wrong?

So far, Round 5 not the bloodbath I was predicting…….this might go longer than 3 hours, folks. Just sayin’.
GET MIKE PELFREY OUT OF THE METS GAME!!!! Guy is giving up hits everywhere to the Pirates, and Andrew McCutchen going off. C’mon, guys.

People, listen: Sriram Hathwar is FOR real. Won’t be surprised to see him go deep into the night tonight.

Sriram and Arvind……Tick and Tock?????

Syringadenous………long word with a rich history, I believe (2006, Theodore Yuan?). Winning word from awhile ago……..Is Tony a spelling bee fan?


Nicholas Rushlow and Joanna Ye going back-to-back in the later statges of the rounds…….sheould be a force for the rest of the day. East Coast division v. the Canadian division at the beginning of rounds. So far, no favorites out yet. All going according to plan……..

“OK, I think I got this.” --- No, Anna-Marie ddidn’t get this. Oops. Tough ,though…..at least she was confident.

Anna Newcombe to start each round now……..Round 6. Chlorthalidone…….uh-oh, she’s having troubles with the word again……is this another 2010 situation?

WHEW…….sometimes championships are won in the last round, but sometimes they’re won in Round 6…….that might be the bullet she dodges.

Lol, renminbi……….geez, my parents, my aunts, my grandparents, EVERYONE in my family could get this correct. Love this word. MONEY!!!

Lily Jordan

Welschmerz….ANOTHER word with a long history…………2006 Finola Hackett, the word that got her out. Man, not a historian of the bee. If I’d gotten that word, I would be moving on.

Sensing a shift here……they’re dropping like flies!!!!!!

Dakota from Nevada…..may be in the spotlight tonight.

Sriram Hathwar: PURE.

Sensing some love on the right side of the stage (high fives, etc. fist pumps, etc.) for the nervous spellers yet to go, as opposed to the isolated Canadian/East Coasters on the other side who have already gone this round.


Nicholas Rushlow facing his first test……he doesn’t seem to know it. Guess on its way? Yes, and it looked educated. That’s one of the tough short words you either know or don’t know………..Woo. Things getting good.

David Phan…..impressive, but not up to the task.

Who is Dhivya Senthil Murugan? One word away from the finals as a 10-year-old. Wow!!! First name remind you of anyone? (like Kavya?)

Ah…. Grace Remmer. Tough exit. One of the first frontrunners to go out……

“Sleeper” alert: Lily Jordan, from Portland, Oregon……called it.

Sriram Hathwar liking Aaron Rodgers………quite a surprise. The favorites really showing up tonight.

Joanna Ye has literally been up on the stage for a minute total….get the word, know the word, spell the word. Sit down. Seems like an easy formula.


Alright, 13 Spellers left. Good field for the finals tonight. Should be some compelling stories with young spellers, spellers from exotic states (Oregon, Nevada), etc. Rankings for tonight in order of likelihood of winning:

1. Laura Newcombe
2. Joanna Ye
3. Sriram Hathwar
4. Sukyana Roy
5. Veronica Penny

That Sriram kid looks determined, man. Scary. Gaining momentum. We'll see tonight. Can't wait.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan