MJ often reminds me of this, but she's probably right: I could never endure everything that goes along with pregnancy. It's really a woman's burden, and the man is only there for the easy part. A primigravida (I learned this from Jeopardy on the April 25th episode!) is a woman pregnant for the first time, which is significant because there's so many unknowns, so many new things, so many new challenges like vomiting, peeing more often, hurting in places you don't often hurt, etc. And that's just for the ladies who are sure they're pregnant. For those who are a little unsure about their chances of having a live birth or birth that lasts to the second trimester there are also so many daily troublesome details like HcG levels, daily check of the pee stick to see if the second line of the two lines is getting darker (it usually starts very faint and becomes a thicker stronger line as the days go by), and changes in one's body. I really can't understand men who abandon the women they impregnate and leave them not only to raise the child by herself but also to fend for herself during the pregnancy. The woman has to do all the hard work; the least the man can do is be as supportive as possible, and just be there as if the man was carrying the baby too. That's the real gender equality that we should be talking about: men should be required, if finding out that the child is theirs, to be there for the woman during childbirth too, because that's actually the biggest injustice/ unfair part, even more so than physical differences and social equality issues, is having to carry the baby, and then after the baby born, be the provider of milk, carry the extra weight around, etc.
Friends of ours have already had their 2nd child, and for every child after the first there's a universal consensus that it's easier, which makes sense: everything that's new is always more vivid, more memorable the first time around, for better or worse. It could be like the first time you have ice cream: you'll remember it fondly forever, but it could also be the first time you go to the dentist: also remember forever but in the "I hope to never do that again" way. I imagine childbirth will be the same: all the pain and and nausea, but those 9 months of suffering hopefully culminate in one shining moment of the first day of parenthood: holding a newborn child in one's arms knowing the baby is yours. There's really no replicating that feeling, and some could say it's the day you build your whole life up for: to provide a new life for someone else so the cycle begins anew. (And then the sleepless nights, spoonfeeding, and changing diapers begins right after that).
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