CBA (Chinese born American)

For most of my life I've identified myself as an ABC- American Born Chinese, as I for all intents and purposes was born in the U.S. and lived my entire life here, growing up listening to baseball games, watching Transformers on TV, eating Honey Nut Cheerios, and attending school with Americans. But "ABC" isn't entirely correct: I was actually born in China; Shanghai to be exact, and only came to America when I was 4.5 years old, on a glorious winter day on December 13, 1991. I seriously do remember it like I was yesterday, one of the first memories I've ever had (that and being pulled out of school the day before and told I was going somewhere very, very far away). 

Anyway, I personally think the "ABC" that America associates with all Chinese Americans should expand a little to my new category, "CBA" or Chinese born American. This correctly identifies a lot of Chinese immigrants or children of immigrants who came to America, but also more functionally gives a middle ground between the pure immigrants who are more Chinese than American and came as adults versus the purely American people born in the U.S. who don't really care about China and sometimes don't even speak Chinese (my sister). I'm stuck somewhere in between, with mostly American values from going through the American educational system and having mostly American friends and doing all American things, but still ingrained with a Chinese heritage. I describe it rather pompously sometimes as "taking the good parts from both cultures." 

This sharing of both American and Chinese cultures really came into light this weekend when MJ and I visited friends with a newborn baby for the baby's baptism (my first baptism! I was never baptized as my parents wouldn't even know what it was other than in Chinese it's called a "cleansing ceremony.") Our friends are a Ukranian- Chinese couple, which is one of the most unique ethnicity combinations in the world, but also means there's a clash of cultures within their in-laws, between our Chinese friend's mother who doesn't speak English at all, versus the Ukranian father whose family all speak Ukranian amongst themselves plus English, but no Chinese. The family picture looks.......interesting. But the important thing is, the baby is healthy and loved by all, and the love really transcends all differences in religion, language, race, food, etc. The priest asked MJ, the godmother of the baby, if she was Buddhist!!!! in a Ukranian-Greco church. The post-baptism feast was also a mishmash of Chinese's spices, oils, heat, and flavor versus the cold cut meats and caviar of Ukranian cuisine. Really unsettling for the stomach to eat both at the same time; like eating peanut butter and soy sauce. Ultimately though, after sitting down and eating, I was able to cut through differences by discussing where I was from, the families' backgrounds, and just cut through the differences through food. I really enjoy that. I am extremely fortunate to have grown up in a land that has so many different cultures that allows for understanding, whereas China and most Asian societies have a closed society with a tendency towards narrow-mindedness. But then I'm also Chinese enough to understand the values of China in putting as much food onto a table for guests as possible, knowing what words to say to describe a situation, know how Chinese people might react in a situation, their way of raising kids and dealing with babies, etc. I am proud of my Chinese-ness, and I'd like to emphasize my American identity (passport is American, pay money to the American government) while also putting that "Chinese" in front as a modifier of that idenity. I'm a CBA ( not collective bargaining agreement).