"How to Make a Good Movie," or “My Obsession with Zooey Deschanel”

I don’t understand why movies are bad nowadays. On Christmas Eve I just watched one of my favorite movies ever, “Elf.” Have seen it like 7 times, never gets tiring. Here’s what we can learn about making a good movie from “Elf”:

1.) Try to be the definitive movie of a genre like Christmas. That way you’re a timeless classic. For me, Elf has transcended Home Alone 2 and How the Grinch Stole Christmas as the definitive Christmas movie and will probably stay at the top of the list barring another movie barging in.
2.) Have smart, witty humor. Audiences are smart. They understand jokes and inside jokes. To me humor is like a work of art: you can mold it over time, you can do various things with it, you can try to appeal to various tastes. However, in those 90 minutes or so you can mold a lot of jokes and situational humor in there, and common folk like me are going to appreciate it.
3.) Good music accompanying the movie. For “Elf” it’s the built-in Christmas songs, but they’re well mixed in like during a nice progression scene or used to
4.) Have the montage of scenes of people doing various things/highlight reel. Boy do I love those scenes. They show a lot of things going on in one’s life/the story in a short amount of time
5.) Have a heartwarming story. Obviously depends on what genre you’re going for, but a tried and true method of making a movie is just have a story that makes sense and is uplifting. I mean, it doesn’t take a genius to come up with, “Orphan adopted by Santa Clause, raised by Elves, tries to fit into real world at age 30 looking for long-lost father.” There’s a lot of stuff that can go from there, and lots of them end in a happy ending.
6.) Creativity. That is something that captures my interest right away. I mean, I think what Hollywood is missing sometimes is just originality. I can see the executives/suits in the studios right now looking at performance reviews and revenue charts and spreadsheets as to what works, and so you have all these prequels, sequels, remakes, copycat movies, etc., etc. that will make money but don’t tell a good story. Fortunately there are still some producers/moviemakers out there that will just try to make a good movie and bring something fresh and new to the table.
7.) Have Zooey Deschanel in the movie. That’s a joke. But she’s an example of a very classy-looking, attractive girl with great singing voice, no outside drama in her personal life, great female lead to match with any of your male leads. Appeals to various audiences: guys love her because she’s attractive and the girl next door, girls like her cuz she’s a strong woman who can sing and always looks put together, (doesn’t do nude scenes), parents like her because she’s a good influence…….put her in any real-life kind of movie and you’re going to get the right type of audience to watch. Same applies for Joseph Gordon-Levitt and a bunch of other actors/actresses.

Also, most of this list comprised of me watching not just “Elf” but also “500 Days of Summer,” (set in LA, among many movies where I've idenitified with the surrounding scenery) 2 guilty pleasures I admit to having watched multiple times. I look forward to more of those types of movies (and I’m not just talking about romantic comedies, but I do like them) coming out using my advice!
I think it’s a great idea to have an outdoor ice skating arena in the middle of downtown Los Angeles. I’ve never went there, but I think I will in the near future. It’s very nostalgic and brings thoughts of holding a woman’s hand while skiing and a “suga-sugashii” (refreshing in Japanese) feel reflecting off the ice in the coolness of winter (although it was like 65 degrees today in LA). Perfect for Midwesterners/east coasters in LA who long for the coolness of  back home. It's like a winter fantasyland. (Fantaji tochi or ファンタジー土地 in Japanese)

Fantasize on (Dewa, Jaa mata),

Robert Yan

Idioms

Ever since my 4^th grade language arts teacher suggested I read a book called “Idiot’s Guide to American Idioms,” I’ve been hooked on idioms, of all languages.

I’m not sure why idioms are called idioms and I’m not even sure what differentiates an idiom from an axiom with a proverb, but they’re nice short set of words that convey a meaning other than what the literal sense is. Chinese languages are really some of the best ones out there. They’re usually 4 words long, but they usually pack a great deal in those 4 words, and they’re rich with cultural importance: they reveal a lot about Chinese culture and values.

Most bizarre idiom: Throwing someone under the bus. For assigning blame to someone else, the bizarre image of one actually pushing someone under the tires of a bus is laughable. Really makes you wonder how people came up with this stuff.

Favorite Japanese idiom: Saru mo ki kara ochiru, aka even monkeys fall from trees. We all make mistakes; I’ve made so many of them already in my life.

Idioms to describe my fantasy football season: Pack it in. Put a fork in’em. The joke was on me. And a shared Chinese and Japanese one (the 2 languages share the same idiom): Chu song on 4 sides. Meaning you’re surrounded by the enemy and you’ve given up all hope. I am very slowly souring on fantasy football, as is Bill Simmons, according to his BS Report podcast, although for different reasons. I’ve come to realize that football is just not very conducive for playing fantasy sports. I’m not talking about popularity or appetite for it, those exist aplenty and more than any other fantasy sport, but they scoring system and style  of play of fantasy football is just not that conducive to fantasy. One outlying play can determine so many fantasy games; games are only played once a week; only about 30% of the players even matter for fantasy. It pales in comparison to basketball or baseball, where there are many more individual plays, things even out due to larger sample size, and stat categories are more than just “you get certain amount of points for a type of play.”

Most useful dating idiom: 花より団子Hana yori dango: (Prefer dumplings over flowers). Means to prefer substance over style or appearance. Definitely a good philosophy to adhere to in dating. I went on a first date recently and really got a great conversation going; it’s amazing how much you can gather from 2 hours of a first date just talking as well as observing: whether they’re early or late, what they’re wearing, how fast they respond to your questions, what kind of follow-up questions they have, if they look at you or not, if they laugh at your jokes, if they (in my case, can figure out your magic tricks), as well as what they’re saying. But the most important thing is the substance of the conversation: what one says reveals a whole lot about oneself. Sure, one sentence usually won’t make or break one’s personality (unless it’s “I’m an axe murderer” or something, and of course people can make mistakes in what they want to convey during a conversation 猿 も 木 から 落ちる(saru mo ki o ochiru) but over the course of 2 hours of conversation a lot of who one is comes out in conversation. That’s kind of where I excel, I think, although who knows, I haven’t been on the other side of a Robert Yan grill session, so it’s possible I’m horrible at it. Also, I received the following compliment from the date: I am not arrogant. If there’s one thing I get from this whole dating experience, it’s that I do not come off as overconfident or cocky on a first date. Good to know.

Reminder to self: if you need to, use the restroom to regroup yourself. You don’t need to just sit there and desperately try to find a new topic to talk about. Also, don’t ask, “do you have any questions for me?” Almost ruined the whole night, which went pretty well, when I asked this as the date wondered if I was imitating a telephone service operator asking if there was anything else the client needed help with.  Ah, I really hope this whole dating thing wont’ be “半途而废”(Chinese for stop in midstream)

Anyway, I encourage everyone to study idioms when learning a language, it really helps get a feel for that language’s accompanying culture, as well as help one understand those idioms when they randomly “make a cameo appearance” so that they don’t “throw a wrench in the works” of your language study.

Fantasize on, (Ganbatte!)

Robert Yan 

Mr. Yan Goes to China Again

A week and a half removed from my most recent Chinese experience, I’m finally ready to recap it; this is the first half as I spent 3 days in Shanghai and then 3 days in Hong Kong/Macau
Shanghai
-The Shanghai rush hour is intense. One striking feature is the rudeness of passengers; a bump or a shove is almost to be expected, and there’s no quick apology or head-bow: these things are expected in rush hour. In fact, there’s really not even a word for in Chinese, much like there’s no “bless you” when someone else sneezes.
-For some reason watches were the big thing street peddlers were selling; my American-looking friend was approached on numerous occasions asking him whether he wanted one; they ignored me, suggesting that these vultures were looking for a certain type of species to prey on.
Both Shanghainese and Cantonese seemed like this intricate maze when I was smaller, but I’m kind of getting a hang of both of them; there’s a certain rhythm to them and structure that I appreciate now that I’m kind of getting into other languages.
Tipping- a big deal. Wasn’t aware that Chinese restaurants don’t accept tips ( hadn’t ever needed to foot the bill before) and was downright rejected a couple times for giving a tip. Harkened back to the Steve Buschemi debate in Reservoir Dogs about whether tipping is necessary or not; definitely feel like it’s a government subsidy for restaurant employees.
Maybe I’m getting old, but my feet hurt incredibly on this trip. Must….walk……less not time.
-Pearl Tower’s probably the crown jewel (pun intended) of the Shanghai tourism universal, and they’ve really made it an amusement park in there. Besides the great view up high, there’s a roller coaster, arcade, fine dining area, revolving buffet, museum, etc., etc. Not exactly Disneyland (Shanghai’s Disneyland is actually being built right now) but pretty glitzy.
The Bund, however, is not glitzy and is urban scenery at its place. Gotta say that a lot of these international cities (Tokyo, Shanghai, Hong Kong) have a much better city line/ architecture than Los Angeles. Los Angeles is……..flat in comparison and without a major river running through it, just major traffic.
Shanghai, as with most modern cities, is very efficient now with its subway system. Can get almost anywhere, and quickly. I am almost positive I will live in one of these subway transportation-based cities soon…..L.A. is just not efficient.
A big thing I noticed that was similar to Tokyo was the amount of temples in urban centers; there’ll be streets and buildings and shopping malls and then suddenly one comes upon an open park with a temple inside with places of worship and burning incense. I guess these would just be churches in America, but pretty intriguing to have open-air religious establishments in such densely populated areas.

Everyone’s on their smartphones. Chinese have a word for it now called “Look-down society.” America has people who only look down at their cell phones while walking/sitting on the train/waiting/doing anything. Chinese have the same, and maybe even more so. EVERYONE has a smartphone.

Hong Kong
I was really looking forward to Hong Kong as Shanghai was more of a relative-bonding trip than sightseeing as I’d see pretty much everything as a kid; Hong Kong really was like being shut in for a while but then being unleashed into the world of Avatar or Lord of the Rings: everything was new and fresh. I didn’t know Hong Kong was a series of islands; I didn’t know Hong Kong had an accompanying Kowloon that is prominent in the urban activity of the city; I didn’t know the airport was on a completely different island (Lantau); I didn’t know horse racing was such a big deal; I didn’t know Cantonese. Ah how I love going to new places.
I was thinking that servers and employees in Hong Kong have to be one of the more language-proficient populations in the world……they have to have at least a basic knowledge of English, Mandarin, and Cantonese, and who knows what other languages for internal tourism. Truly a multicultural city.
There’s a Goldfish Market, a Birdcage Market, a Flower Market, basically a market for any kind of thing you can think of. Should I go there and start a fantasy football market?
The views of Hong Kong are spectacular. There’s a daytime view and a night view, and I still can’t decide which one is better. It is a very condensed city as the whole area is on one island, so the buildings are close to each other and you really get a nice skyline, unlike the 7 buildings that tower up above Los Angeles’s massive spread. At night all the buildings light up, and there’s even a light show every night across the Victoria Harbor that’s…..not spectacular but still pretty significant given that they do one every night.
To emphasize just how fast technology is moving, there are internet kiosks INSIDE the railroad stations one can use to access the internet (as long as you keep it to 15 minute sessions). No questions asked. Totally eliminates the need for internet cafes, etc. and shows how much people rely on their smartphones that these places are just given away for free. I personally enjoyed emailing, checking my fantasy football team from 10,000 miles away (although it turns out I would lose the matchups).
It’s really hard to describe being on the streets of Hong Kong. It’s at once disorganized and structured, kind of like controlled chaos. There are people selling all kinds of things sold on the streets and people just milling about with cabs, cars, bicycles motorcycles, trolley lines, buses,  and all kinds of transportation, but you have very defined regions too Really epitomized what I think of in a modern Asian city…..lots of people, hustle, and bustle. O and horse racing.
Lantau is a separate island from Macau and Kowloon that’s all natural beauty….it has a giant Buddha and a nice cable car system that gives a great overlook of the Hong Kong Islands and harbors……..truly a great scene. When I went to Japan I did not experience any of the seas or island nature of Japan…..in Hong Kong I did; it was everywhere. There’s also “new territories” in Hong Kong that we didn’t even have time to visit……if there was a futuristic movie setting a city on an island separated from the world, Hong Kong would be it, I’d think, or at least I’d have Hong Kong in my mind. Truly a one-of-a-kind place that I’m gonna make sure I go to only once.


Macau
We only went to Macau for an afternoon/night session, but we got a lot done and it was really pretty eye-opening. We went through perhaps the busiest and loudest street market I’ve ever been through (it may be just me but Cantonese seems like a very LOUD dialect) on our way to Fortaleza de Monte (Monte Fort) where there’s a giant fort where you can see Macau in 4 different directions. My whole time walking the streets of Macau I saw one person who looked kind of Portuguese. The rest were tourists and Chinese people.
Wynn Macau might be my favorite casino ANYWHERE. It’s got a Bellagio-like water show every 15 minutes but the fresh Asian songs really got me as well as PYROTECHNICS. Yes, fire!!!! Truly eye-opening.
My friends consider me a derelict gambler, but even I was priced out of the Macau casino’s betting limits. First off, the most popular game is baccarat, which I don’t know how to play, but the minimum bet at these places was like $500 HK minimum, aka like $75  US minimum!!!!! The Wynn Las Vegas is only $15 US! What’s up with that! It might also because people in Macau or not there to have fun while gambling, drink while gambling, or “root against the dealer” like in craps/blackjacks (very sparse amount of tables in Macau as opposed to in US where it’s the main attractions)……they’re there to win money.
Everything about Macau screams “GAMBLE!” As soon as we got off the ferry from HK to Macau (one runs every 15 minutes and they’re all sold out) you can see free buses shuttling people to each of the casinos. They want to get you to the casinos as soon as possible.
I mean, why even have the Macau dollar? Restaurants accept Hong Kong dollars or Chinese Yuan, but they’re slightly different where Macau dollar is slightly less valuable so you have to go to the trouble of calculating………we should make tourism less complicated, guys, come on!
Btw, I’m a big believer in being able to watch good movies on internal flights (mainly because you’re packed in for at least 11 hours and you can’t just nap through that)…….Don’t take China Eastern Airlines. Take China Southern Airlines. Subtle difference, but huge IMO for spending that extra vacation time on the plane. I don’t know about most people, but my idea of flying to my vacation destination involves completely letting loose and vegetating on a movie.


Coming in 2014: Austrailia/Thailand?

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan 

Luck be a lady

How much does luck play a role? Well, Andrew Luck plays a huge role on the Colts, who will easily win the AFC South season and look to do some serious damage in the AFC playoffs. But I’m talking about luck in fantasy football, and now that I lost in devastating fashion in my “this is the league I care about” league by ending the season on a 5-game losing streak and missing the playoffs by 1 game, I felt it time to (whine) write about how much luck plays a role in fantasy football. (Hint: It’s a lot)

1.)    Injuries- the amount of season-ending injuries in JUST the fantasy football landscape this year were too numerous to count.  Arian Foster, Reggie Wayne, Jake Locker, Sam Bradford, Julio Jones, Randall Cobb, David Wilson, are just some of the fantasy studs that landed on IR this season. Realize that the fantasy football players we care about cover only about 25% of the league, and we realize how much of an epidemic injuries are.  There’s an argument that one can predict injuries based on injury history, but that doesn’t explain Arian Foster, who’s been healthy every season he’s played, or Ryan Mathews, who’s stayed healthy this season despite being hurt all the time. There’s a lot of “freak” in these injuries. And football is pretty unique in that an injury to one player can devastate the value of another, i.e., Jordy Nelson when Aaron Rodgers went down (and was replaced by Scott Tolzien), or all Indy receivers a few years ago when Peyton Manning went down. Injuries are magnified in fantasy football.

2.)    Touchdowns – the fact that a TD can be worth as much as 60 yards is pretty absurd. You can have PPR-leagues, yardage leagues, return yardage leagues, etc., but no matter what format, TD’s are the great equalizer. And they’re random; how many times do you say Calvin Johnson get tackled at the 1 and then Kris Durham get the 1-yard TD pass? Or the fullback scores? Or a defensive TD? Touchdowns are the hardest things to predict for an individual player’s performance, but they’re worth the most points in fantasy football.

3.)    Less games – NFL has 16 games of stats to go off of (really 15 because fantasy football leagues don’t usually use Week 17), compared to 162 games for the MLB, 82 for the NBA. That means large swings of information based on one game. The “less games” also makes a manager less able to adjust, whereas in baseball one can adjust daily lineups, in football one cannot change lineups during a game and once the game’s over the whole week is over. No adjustments = less skill involved, more luck involved.

4.)    Less positions to fill- my “I care about it a lot league” has ample positions including 2QBs and 2 flex positions, but many leagues I play in only have 1 QB, 2 RB, 3 WR, 1 TE, 1 K, 1 DEF, sometimes even less than that. That’s 9 positions you need to account for, as opposed to 21 in standard baseball leagues, 12 or so in fantasy basketball leagues. The impact of one player having a monster game gets magnified. Anytime there’s less sample size, luck plays a bigger role.

Really, most fantasy football people realize this, which is why fantasy football has the least dealings with “advanced metrics” like baseball or other scientific stat points, it’s pretty much recognized in the fantasy world as more of a crapshoot than anything else, so people just go with it knowing that it’s more of a luck fest. But it’s very very fun, and a great way to compete with other enthusiasts, even casual ones, which maybe why it’s the most popular.

I have a theory about this. (You thought the article was over, didn’t you?) I think Americans like the fact that there’s a lot of luck involved. That’s why people play the lottery, play table games at casinos. You know there’s really no skill involved in “hitting” on a 16 against a 21, but you do it anyway because you want to “test your luck,” and sometimes it works. Even when science is screaming at you that the 45% chance that it turns out well doesn’t make sense against the 55% chance it won’t, your body feels good when that 45% chance pans out, and you have fun. That’s lady luck for you, and she comes in many forms, especially in fantasy football. 

How do you say "lucky" in Japanese? They say "rakki," or basically just "lucky." A lot of Japanese words are taken from English words. So you already  know more Japanese than you think. 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan 

Ambiguous Signals

The Japanese are great at ambiguity and subtlty. For example, the phrase “Kekko desu” can mean “yes” or “no” depending on the context, and there is no rule to differentiate them! Also, “Daijobu desu” can mean “That’s fine” or “Never mind, forget it, that’s fine.” Completely opposite meanings. Studying the language is hard enough as it is;

Ambiguities in dating/trying to get a date are difficult as well. One has to be aware of the little “hints,” “body language,” and “eye contact.” It’s not an exact science, and women don’t just go up to someone and say “I want to date you.” (Well, I guess if one is a rock star, Brad Pitt, or professional athlete, women throw themselves on) but it’s definitely tough to guess, and sometimes one makes a mistake in interpretation. Girls are weird. Some are subtle. Some are just bubbly by nature and seem flirtatious when not really being flirtatious. Some girls are crazy. Some girls might be the nicest girls on the face of the earth but one would not be able to tell. So tough.  Two cues that seem like a pretty definite sign : Recently, I went on a date and bought a “gag gift” for a girl, nothing major that was sort of an inside joke (The Japanese do this all the time when meeting someone and say, “Tsumaranai koto desu.” Meaning “It’s nothing major.” I got a text later that night that said, “Thanks for the friendship (item).” Pretty much says it all without saying too much. I get it. Sigh. Pretty much as unambiguous

(not sure why I’m publicizing all of these dating horror stories, btw, I guess I’m hoping someone will commiserate with me one day on these difficulties and justifyall the obstacles I’ve encountered, but so far everyone I’m met says stuff like “O Match.com is great! I’ve heard lots of people use it!”

Anyway, the biggest ambiguous signal in fantasy football is knowing if one big performance from a player is indicative of a trend. The span of results for a guy coming off something like a 100-yard, 2TD game (for a RB) or a 9-catch, 131 yard performance for a WR after being completely unheard of prior to that game is as wide as anything in fantasy sports. (I call it the Samkon Gado Concept- named for a GB running back several years ago who came from being a neurosurgeon to starting in the NFL). It’s a very ambiguous situation- fantasy owners don’t know whether to believe in that performance as an indicator of things to come or just a total blip on the radar. Type A is a guy like Victor Cruz, who came on the scene in Week 3 of the 2011 season with a 100-yard, 2TD game for the Giants where the Giants already had great WR’s Hakeem Nicks and Mario Manningham, but Cruz outplayed all of them and almost everyone else in WR-land that year, carrying me and many other fantasy footballers to victory. Cruz’s don’t happen that much, and for every Cruz there’s a Zach Sudfeld (heralded as the next Rob Gronkowski for Tom Brady, never did anything, and was cut) or a David Terrell, or a Frisman Jackson, etc., etc. etc. Yea you’ve never heard of those guys, but at some point they put up a fantasy fantasy performance for at least one game.

I think the code to deciphering those ambiguous performances is the type of game….if it’s 3 REC, 150 Yards, it’s a fluke. One play probably dictated that entire line. So I like to see little cuts, like the QB kept targeting that receiver, or the RB kept getting carries that made one assume he will get more. Very obvious information, but still. Also, talent wins out in the end, so a guy like Jerrico Cotchery (completely immobile receiver who only catches) will also be Jerrico Cotchery, whereas a guy like Victor Cruz (was the fastest guy on the team) or Kembrell Thompkins (1^st round draft pick) has a lot of upside and might win enough opportunities to get in a position for another explosion.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan 

Life is a Game of Inches

Life is a game of inches. Every sport has a similar phrase, and it’s pretty true in all sports: basketballs miss right off the iron, baseballs travel just over the reach of an outstretched glove, receivers’ feet step just over the end line in the end zone; Half an inch left for young Gordon Bombay and Mighty Ducks would have never happened. These are the “six inches in front of your face” that Al Pacino was talking about in “Any Given Sunday.” The difference between things happening and not happening are razor thin, have to make sure in every situation you make the best effort to be on the right side of those inches.

Life’s the same way.

1.)    My car (new 2013 Honda Accord) got grazed the other day, it is now unsightly and I had to go do a paint touch-up to it.

2.)    Lawsuits are decided because someone marked a “t” instead of a “y” and a contract does not read as it should.

3.)    Tumors spread just short of the heart and allow someone to live.

These are just some of the examples; maybe I’m just in a contemplative mood but it’s fascinating how many things turn out differently if one just does something a little differently; it reminds me (and should everyone) how diligently we need to work. I am one of those people who live like that, that life is a game of inches and I don’t want to let any bit of that inch get away. I try to get through traffic as soon as possible because (horror of all horrors) I might miss something or someone if I’m late, I need to finish these couples words of studying because they might be needed somewhere down the line in a crucial situation; I need to finish this on time or else my whole day will be ruined. It’s a bit silly, a bit perfectionist, but it’s how I go about, especially in the limited amount of time we have every day. We’re given about 16 waking hours or about 960 minutes every day to go about our business, I don’t like to waste any of those minutes. I think that’s been especially accentuated during my time as a lawyer, where billing occurs in hourly or 15-minute or 6-minute increments, depending on how one’s billables are determined, and I plan my schedule far in advance and always ask myself “am I using these hours productively?” and if the answer is “No,” I think of what I can do to start getting them productive.

It’s probably not a particularly healthy or low-stress lifestyle, but it’s the one I have chosen (and was probably destined) to lead. Life is a game of inches. I’m try to get every inch that I can get.

Fantasy sports can be a game of inches too. Here’s how to use miniscule details to extract the most minor of advantages against your opponents.  (This is for advanced fantasy addicts)

1.)    Find out which players your opponents are heavily targeting on draft day and bid them up on draft day, especially in an auction draft.

2.)    Find out what the weather conditions are before a football matchup. Heavily influences how the game plays in turns of running the ball, turnovers, kicking conditions, etc. Rain/mud = turnovers, windy = run the ball more, bad kicking conditions, etc.

2a.) Find out the weather conditions before an MLB game and see if there are chances of a rainout. Especially important in fantasy playoff time when every game counts.

3.)    IN daily transaction leagues, snatch up guys you don’t need every day so that your opponents are deprived of them, then set them free to the waiver wire so that your opponent cannot use those players prior to the players clearing waivers, thus “hijacking the waiver wire.” Use with caution; maybe seen as unethical by some managers.

4.)    Lot of information in the preseason that managers don’t utilize, instead relying on pre-draft magazines published months before the actual draft. NBA preseason is especially predictive, but every sport’s preseason has a huge impact on roles/deciding starters. Check daily news every day during this time.

5.)    Put early game guys in the most specific position slots (RB, WR, etc.) and then late-game guys in the flex spots (UTIL, FLEX, RB/WR etc.) so that if the late-game guys suddenly bail you have a wide arrangement of players you can replace them with.

6.)    Never have a kicker on your roster during the week in NFL, instead using it on a backup WR/RB in case one of the starters gets hurt, then pick a kicker up on Sunday morning as there will always be a kicker available.

7.)    In basketball head-to-head leagues, always figure out if your opponent is punting certain categories so that you can be just a little ahead of them in that category instead of wasting the stats on an abundance of counters that you don’t need. (Check minutes before lineups lock as some opposing managers can be looking at you too and making last-minute adjustments).

8.)    In making trades, try to get a small concession from your opponent by making one of the conditions that you receive the player in favorable timing, like if you’re giving up a starting pitcher, make the trade complete AFTER the SP’s final start with your team,  or if you are getting a star hitter, make the trade effective when he’s heading into a STRONG hitting situation. Opponents rarely say no in these situations. 

The Death of the Elite Fantasy Football RB

I grew up in the age of the running back. In 1998 or 1999, even before I had heard of what fantasy football was, I inadvertently turned on the radio in my parents’ old Dodge Grand Caravan (that was a great car for road trips) and heard a fantasy football program listing some of the best fantasy players of the time…….and they were all running backs. LaDanian Tomlinson, Emmitt Smith, Marshall Faulk, Brian Westbrook, Curtis Martin, Shaun Alexander, Priest Holmes. These guys were downright beasts and mentioned at the top of every fantasy football magazine, radio show, TV program, conversation, etc. With good reason. These running backs were usually good for 1,500 yards and at least 16 TD’s, some averaged 20 TD’s a year.

The landscape of fantasy football has changed in 2013. Don’t get wrong; the top picks in fantasy football are still running backs, but that’s because of position scarcity, not because these running backs are still at the top of their game. The league has become a pass-heavy league with the rules favoring wide receivers and passing, so running has become a relic. Gone are the days when LT had 4-TD games followed by Priest Holmes putting up his own 4TD game, where “feature backs” were expected to get at least 25 carries a game. Now the running back pool is inundated with timeshares, split backfields, and general lack of devotion to the run game. The run game is boring; Mobile QB’s take up carries that RB’s would have gotten before; it’s better to feature the pass, etc., etc. etc.

Case in point: Of the top 12 fantasy scorers in all of fantasy (Yahoo! Standard scoring this year), ONE is a RB: Jamaal Charles, the only exception to the new trend, the guy who runs all the time for his team, a true bastion of hope for those who cling on to the feature-RB philosophy. Then you have Matt Forte ( just ahead of the likes of QB’s Alex Smith), then a TIGHT END Jimmy Graham, another couple QB’s, LeSean McCoy (the modern-day Brian Westbrook), then WIDE RECEIVERS Calvin Johnson and AJ Green, then DeSean Jackson, and finally the a string of RB’s after that.

Adrian Peterson, acknowledged as the best runner IN THE WORLD, has the same amount of fantasy points as WR Dez Bryant. Things just aren’t what they were any more, and people can pick up time-share RB’s and emerging studs like Zac Stacy, Knowshon Moreno, Giovanni Bernard, and Danny Woodhead. The first round of drafts (traditionally acknowledged as the time of the “stud RB” yielded Arian Foster (hurt), Ray Rice (underperforming), CJ Spiller (lost starting job) and  Alfred Morris (getting TD’s vulture left and right). So these RB’s are producing like they should be AND they get injured more because NFL players are bigger and faster. So why are we picking these guys so high again? Perhaps fantasy players should really re-examine what they want to do next year and instead pick up the Top TE by far (Jimmy Graham) or a top QB (pick of Manning, Brees, or Rodgers) or rock-solid Megatron or AJ Green with that top pick. Cuz that RB? It just ain’t rock solid anymore.

Life, like the NFL, progresses quickly. Trends emerge over time. Things I value are much more different than things I valued before, just in the span of the time of this blog (coming up on 7 years in February). When I started this blog, I was on an obsession of being on The Mole, a reality TV show, that had most recently aired in 2002. I was convinced I would either get on Survivor, Big Brother, the Amazing Race, or any of the major reality TV shows I was interested in at the time. I even participated in online “Survivor simulations” where I competed against other people. Yea, it was a weird time. Reality TV was a big priority for me. It is no longer, although I still wouldn’t mind going on one of those shows (and still convinced I would do well). Amazing Race- it’s not too late call me.

Learning from that, I know that my interests and priorities will change a few years from now, and I’ll look back at some of the things I care about as trivial and mundane. I have a strong affinity of getting invited to weddings, for example. I have a feeling that will fade after the wedding rush that my friends will have soon as well as (hopefully) planning my own. Fantasy sports will probably never go away, but it will fade in intensity as I understand (even now) that it is more of a game (video game) that’s a luxury, not a way of life (and no matter how good I am at it, I can’t overcome the lack of time I will have to manage it as well as the elements of luck involved).

I’ll also look admiringly at some of the things I am able to do nowadays (like a fantasy player now hunting for a RB admiring the amazing stats that were compiled at that position in the glory years). I sometimes look back at high school, especially junior year, and wonder how I survived. AP classes, tennis, chess, SATs, orchestra rehearsal, and I had a part-time job that year on top of it. Probably the most productive year of my life, bar none, although this one ranks up there.

So I guess the lesson here is enjoy it while it lasts and take a good mental image of how it feels to feel right now, because like Ricky Watters, Barry Sanders, and Edgerrin James, it might not ever come back. For me, the next 3 years or so are probably my last being single, so it’ll be the end of eating whatever I want, dictating my own schedule, planning for myself and myself only. I’ll make sure to go on as many road trips, international trips, and random excursions as much as possible. Because one day, I’ll wake up and find myself with Arian Foster and Ray Rice hurt and the likes of Joseph Randle and Chris Ogbonnaya on the waiver wire (like I did today)

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan 

Dating Life Horror Stories for Halloween

Recently I was at a Starbucks and witnessed one of the most awkward moments in my life: a man coming from the street asking the woman next to me if she was single (after confessing that “she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen,”) and the woman promptly breaking the news that she was married. Devastating. I felt bad, almost as awkward as watching an Office episode sometimes, getting that cringing feeling and not wanting to see the car crash. But is that the worst kind of rejection I’ve ever had? The different ways I’ve been rejected:

1.)    Going to Vegas with a girl, rooming IN THE SAME HOTEL ROOM and then when out gambling, random guy cuts in and asks girl “if we were together.” She says “No.” Ouch.

2.)    Sending out “hopefully intriguing” emails on match.com and just getting no reply. That’s not that uncommon and actually preferred over some of these others.

3.)    Asking if a girl was available over the phone after texting back and forth and basically just being told no.

4.)    Asking a different girl who had gone to tennis with and chatted for months if she wanted to go out, told “she was too busy.”

5.)    Asked a girl at work (temporary position, was leaving the position soon) by card (attached a flower to the note writing a large section asking to get coffee sometime, and was sent an email later that night indicating “maybe at a later time.” Yea ,this was a confusing time…..why did I send a card, you ask? It’s complicated and has to do with “not getting the timing down when the co-worker was leaving work to ask personally as well as mental lapses caused by being “restructured” (Japanese euphemism for being let go).

Yea so a lot of NOs. Fortunately I’ve gotten a few “yes’s” in my life so I haven’t gone totally crazy, but what I’ve learned is that usually when a girl wants you to ask them out, they’ll give some hints, and you gotta pounce on those (I didn’t pounce on several “could be’s” that could have turned out to be “yes’,” and when a girl doesn’t want you to ask them out, you’ll probably know. Again, life is difficult when you’re not a movie star/very  handsome/good-looking. Again, I liken dating to buying houses or any other type of goods in supply: the best-looking houses will get snatched up quickly because most people objectively like that house, the lesser ones eventually might get picked but it’ll take some time and some massive selling for someone to go in and take a deeper look……..which might lead to GOLD! (Yes, I’m comparing myself to gold). Gosh, I really hope I can look back at these last couple posts and be able to laugh and not have it be just the beginning of a downward spiral of bad experiences.

Anyway, lots going on in fantasy right now……October, as I’m sure has been mentioned by me on this blog as well as lots of sports experts everywhere, is (along with March and April) the best sports month in the year, and it just passed. Baseball ended (congrats to the Boston Red Sox, possibly gate-to-gate the best team in baseball all year, unlike previous champions San Francisco Giants and St. Louis Cardinals), football’s in full swing, and basketball just kicked off.

Here’s Bobby’s Novel Betting Theory: Just look up what the majority of people are betting on, and just take the opposite. I just tried it on ESPN Pick’em league today, went a very snappy 8 for 12, should have went  8 for 11 if not for the Texans blowing a 24-6 lead at halftime after their coach collapsed on the field and losing 27-24 to lose a +2.5 spread. (Yea, I was not happy).

Bobby’s new “becoming an adult” theory:  In almost all fantasy leagues nowadays I’m starting to embrace a “this guy finally is becoming an adult” theory, where I try to get guys who are entering their 3^rd, 4^th, 5^th years depending on the sport. I think this has a lot to do with me personally gaining experience in the world (my 2^nd full year in the “real world” and understanding that maturity and experience sometimes trump skill and resisting the ever-so-tempting hype of a pure-talent rookie. This doesn’t always apply and sometimes applies differently for different positions, like QB (the older the better, really) v. RB’s (the younger the better) but definitely applies in baseball and basketball. I like Nicholas Batum (5^th year) more than Kyrie Irving (2^nd year), etc.

And as Alfonso Soriano, David Ortiz and Carlos Beltran proved this year (they were key cogs on my fantasy team too, btw), age can sometimes be a boon, not a deterrent.

Gravity is a great movie. The way a 3D movie truly should be. Do not watch Captain Phillips if you get seasick. I got seasick AT THE MOVIE.

The more I think about Halloween, the more I think of how great a holiday it is. Other countries don’t have it; definitely something the people should rally behind. It’s not just for little kids; sure there’s the built-in component of candy on Halloween and scary movies and what not, but one of the essential themes behind Halloween is dressing up as someone else: being able to dress like someone that’s not you for a day, take up a different identity, whether that be a superhero, a villain, a monster, a profession, a celebrity, a cartoon character, whatever, you take on the characteristics of that person and can act like that person without fear of being accused of hypocrisy or shameless pandering. We’re ourselves 364 days (sometimes even 365) days of the year, it’s good sometimes to take up another personality, see life through another’s shoes, mix it up a little bit. I’m sure most people, if not all, have wondered what it is like to be someone else for a day; I know I think about it about every day. To be able to just change personalities, change your entire way of life, now that’d be powerful. Halloween allows you to do that (with the caveat of not being able to do so permanently as well as the knowledge that you aren’t really that thing) for a day. I think that’s really powerful and should be embraced, not only in this country as a holiday that’s more significant that the no-official-recognition-you-still-have-to-go-to-school/work status it has now and in other countries as a holiday worth having.

My favorite expression (ichiban-suki na kotoba) in Japanese currently is: giri-giri maniatta!, meaning “barely making it on time,” which happens all the time in L.A. due to traffic, if not being late altogether. Also it just sounds cool. That and “Daijobu desu.” (meaning it’s OK!)

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan 

Dear Diary

The following is a blog post written in “Dear Diary” form, which means it will be monopolized by the feelings of the writer, one Robert “Da Man” Yan, and probably will not provide the fantasy advice some might seek, but will go deep into the feelings and emotions of Robert Yan, one of the most honest and self-reflective posts perhaps ever in the history of this blog.  It also happens to be 3AM in the morning when I’m writing this, so thoughts may be garbled/ unnecessarily blunt or “honest.” Read on if you dare; you have been warned.

Dear Diary, so much has happened this year, 2013, the Year of the Snake. I have different emotions flowing through; I’m at once satisfied and yearning, I’m at once frustrated and content, I’m at once finally settled and yet still searching, I’m at once competitive but lackluster. What’s going on? I probably sound like a broken record at this point, but I’ve reached another turning point in my life. For the last year or so, I’ve intermittently been doing document review (a sort of non-legal legal work is the best way I can describe it) while learning Japanese, in hopes of being fluent enough in Japanese to do both Chinese and Japanese document review. In my mind I’ve fantasized it as doing the work now to pay off the bills while my little salmon/carp self swims upstream (learn Japanese) until I turn into a dragon, but in reality it’s probably just an avaricious desire to earn more money while doing the same amount of work. That explains, though, why I’ve been so non responsive in my blog posts (this only being the 23^rd one all year, mostly because I try to squeeze every extra moment I can into learning Japanese words) -  (Japanese lesson of the day: “Ikutsu ka no jikan de shiboru.” It also gives me some firm ground to stand on in terms of work for the next few years------I can make enough to support myself  (with a bit of a surplus) for the next few years, and for someone who had been disillusioned by the law and not necessarily wanting to continue down the dark and treacherous path of litigation, I am strangely calm, although I’m always a little cautious now that this is one of those “calm before the storm” situations like when I thought I was all good going into law school.

Dear Diary, so that explains why I haven’t written to you more. But also in the last year I’ve discovered another love of my life: Dodgeball. For the last year I’ve played dodgeball 3, 4, and up to 5 times a week. I love this game; it allows me to “take revenge” for all those years I was picked on in middle school for being unathletic or chubby, for being picked last in all those pickup basketball games (although, during college I became an excellent shooter of the basketball) where in dodgeball, I have just the right combination of skill, throwing ability, hand-eye coordination, and stamina to be a pretty strong force and consensus-voted one of the “Best catchers in LA.” I now feel wanted, I feel free, and at certain times, I feel invincible, which is one of the best feelings in sports/ life. Plus the game is a great stress relief/ exercise. I can’t ask for anything more. I will probably love playing dodgeball for the rest of my love.

Dear Diary, my actual love life is still a bit of a mess. To be more accurate, it’s still hasn’t gotten off the ground. I look back at the various times in my life to explain why I’m 26 and single and not having had a serious long-term relationship yet ever. EVER! I recently read 1Q84, a Japanese classic (reading it in both Japanese and English) and it’s very similar to when the 2 main characters look back at a single moment in their childhood when they held hands, but then can never find each other again. I feel the same way except I had like EIGHT of those chances. Chances like in college when a girl actually invited me to come to a party and I declined. Chances like when I went out on a few dates with a girl in college but didn’t follow through because I was on my way to law school. Chances like in high school a really nice girl saved me from having to ask someone to prom by asking me out first (she’s now married). Chances like having a really nice conversation with a mutual friend who I really connected with and really would have liked having a relationship with but never followed through. What have I done wrong here? It’s really been a comedy of errors on my part, but also I haven’t been exactly dealt the best poker hand in the game of Matching Life.

Dear Diary, I still can’t completely rid my acne! They say that acne is indicating of a person’s total health, but I am COMPLETELY healthy. I haven’t gotten sick in 5 years. The only real problem I have is having bad skin. Acne’s better than it was in my teenage years, and I’ve founds some ways to mitigate the damage, but I still haven’t found the root of the problem, I haven’t exterminated the big rat hideout. It’s frustrating; I’ve been to various dermatologists, tried various products, diets, creams, etc., etc. It’s just like the forums for acne say: I’m one of those guys that just keep trying and trying. So yea not only did I not get dealt movie star features, but also bad skin that takes a toll psychologically; I refrain from talking to people at times, feel low self-esteem, not to mention decrease my physical attractiveness. And that’s a problem because……

Dear Diary, I recently joined Match.com on the suggestion of some friends and realized….yea welcome to the real world. Online dating is similar to real dating in one very practical area that no one talks about: people rely on physical features primarily when they first meet someone. Dating sites, matchmakers, all people in general don’t readily acknowledge it because it hurts their business/it makes them look shallow/ it hurts people’s feelings or whatever, but physical attractiveness DEFINITELY is the main factor. I mean, I do it too. Everyone does. It’s the same as when you buy a house, you look at the yard, the exterior, and how it looks on the outside first. It’s why when someone compliments your husband/wife/gf/bf/significant other, it’s a compliment to say, “Wow, they’re cute!” to show that you’ve done a good job. Physical attractiveness is the most valuable commodity in dating/meeting new people. It can be improved, but not as much as by natural means. Some people are just blessed with beauty; those people get the most interest/feel loved, while the rest of us (myself included) have to “lower our standards” or accept that someone is “out of our league.”

Dear Diary, I think there shouldn’t be leagues. I hate when someone says they’re out of a league, as if humans are based on some sort of class system. More accurately, I HATE when someone says I’m not worthy. It’s been a constant chip on my shoulder since childhood days, to prove someone wrong when they don’t think I can do it, or don’t pick them for their team. So it’s hard for me to accept that I’m “out of someone’s league,” and I haven’t found a way to solve it yet. And sure, I know that it’s really about finding someone you love and cherish and who’s perfect for you just the way you are, but I want to feel wanted, I want to feel appreciated, I don’t want to have someone have to “settle for me” like all the other good-looking M&M’s in the bag have been eaten and I’m the only one left. I have a lot going for me: I am a professional man living in one of the best cities in one of the best countries in the world. I am very well educated; I am well read; I can speak at least 2 languages fluently, hopefully a 3^rd soon. I have my own car; I can sustain myself; I am an athlete; I can play almost any sport; I can get along with almost anyone and strike up a conversation; I can make people laugh and show them magic tricks; I laugh at least twice a day; I give to charity (just gave my old car to charity, driving a 2013 Honda Accord now), I volunteer, I have family values; I KNOW I would be a good father one day.

Dear Diary, it’s hard to explain to my parents/ aunt about why I don’t have a girlfriend ready to get engaged now. The truth is, I try; I get rejected. I deal with rejection all the time; it’s becoming where each time it happens a little piece of me dies. Each time I get rejected I feel a part of me And I do get a few “yes’s,” but unfortunately they’re not the ones that really interest me, and I feel a little guilty with those because I feel like now I’m the one being picky and rejecting others. It’s very frustrating. Now with Match.com those rejections don’t just come with a nice “maybe some other time” or “I’m busy that day.” Now it’s just a no-response situation, which in some ways is worse, like a “you’re not even worth my time to respond” thing (although, in truth it’s the most accepted way and reasonable way to decline on something like Match.com) akin to the rejection method of law firms when I was trying to find a law job during law school. It’s frustrating; I keep thinking one day I’ll get on the other side of the mountain and see a rainbow (kind of like what’s happened with my job situation, which has actually kind of opened up for me), but then the flip side comes up and I picture myself as a older ojiisan (Japanese for older man) who’s still dokushin (single) and as my sister says, “forever alone.” Sigh.

Dear Diary, I’ve some interest in fantasy sports, my previous love. I’m just not that into it. Perhaps it’s some backlash from the fantasy baseball season, and I just need time to get back into it, but the more and more I think about it it’s such a trivial thing: analyzing player values and watching games just for the fantasy merit; it’s really time consuming and I don’t have much time for it anymore, and the thrill of the chase (for victory) just doesn’t give me enough motivation. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll always play and it definitely keeps me in touch with some great friends, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be the 2007-2013 “fully fantasy force Robert Yan. In some ways, fantasy has become the mistress to my main goal of finding a love interest/someone I can share the rest of my life with.

Dear Diary, Does anyone read this blog anymore? I wouldn’t blame people if they don’t read because I haven’t been writing as much this year, but if anyone read this blog they would get to know what kind of person I am, how I think, the kind of humor I integrate into my life, the things I value, my daily life. I feel like that would be the best Match.com profile instead of a random picture of my face doing something. Reading my old blog posts, I really cherish how I’ve grown since 2007, the minuscule things I think about, the things I valued back in the day but don’t really now. I wouldn’t rewrite any of that stuff; it’s how I felt in the moment, it’s who I am. One day I just wish someone would read what I have written and go, “Wow I’m glad I wound up with this guy, he’s a pretty cool dude.” Sigh. One wonders.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan 

Fantasy Football Art Auction 2013

The FantasySportGuru Draft Committee would like to welcome you to the 2013 Fantasy Football Art Auction, a comprehensive look at the fun facts, features, and most importantly, exhibits attached to this year’s fantasy football landscape. And maybe, depending on how you feel about the exhibits we show you, if you’re feeling particularly possessive of certain exhibits, you could invest in them at the end of the tour, either through our standard auction style or through the more classic “snake” style.

We’d like to first direct you to the wall of the Hall of Fame of Fantasy Football gallery, Mr. Brees, Rodgers, Manning, and Brady. These fine portraits depict men of an extraordinary nature, who have truly shaped the entire fantasy football world and are easily Hall of Famers. Not only can you see them in fine action shots throughout the museum, but their various accomplishments in long and storied careers are extolled in the displays. These Hall of Famers will garner Ooohs and Aaahs from admiring art enthusiasts for your collection, but they will come at a premium. 

To the right of the Hall of Famers you’ll find another prominent picture of one Cameron Newton, who recently have been recommended by some of our patrons to be put in this gallery. He might carve out his one spot one day, but for now we have in the same room, just not in the same Hall of Fame row. If there was one of these we would recommend, I think you will get the best value out of Tony Romo, placed this year on the back wall and not gathering much interest. The painting is just as valuable in a display lineup, but may not have the same glitz and glamor of some of the other ones. We assure you that it’ll serve almost the same purpose (4000 yards, 35 TD’s as some of these others).

We would recommend that you ignore the Steven Jackson booth, aka The Hall of Shattered Dreams and Broken Promises ; Many appreciate the grunt hard work and blunt brutality of Steven Jackson, but in terms of production it feels like every year it’s barely 1000 yards, single digit touchdowns……Even moving it from its former museum to a new gallery is not doing it. Jackson also just turned 30, a very dangerous age for a RB work.

The newly-arrived collections of Stevan Ridley and David Wilson are generating quite a buzz, but Ridley doesn’t catch passes, and Wilson hasn’t rushed for more than 400 yards in a season yet. Calm down on the hype; we still have plenty of Maurice Jones-Drews available in stock.

I know your art classes often advocated ignoring golden boots (kickers), and I’m not advocating for you to do so, but man Blair Walsh is so tempting with his big leg and playing in a dome.  Worth $1 in an auction, just for the excitement of watching a long kick in the air.

We would be remiss to not direct you to the crown jewel of our museum, the Mona Lisa, the Hope Necklace, if you will, Mr. Adrian Peterson. Collected from the battlefield of the Metrodome, Mr. Peterson become a legend of his day. Many of his disciples have sworn by his principles.  Make sure you bid high for this collection, but there are plenty of lesser-known pieces like the Rice, McCoy, Martin, and Foster collections that go for less that might some expect to possibly eclipse the Peterson, if Peterson is found to have any sort of defect. We’ll know for sure by the end of the year. 

Thank you for visiting the 2013 Fantasy Football Art Auction. We "bid" you farewell and encourage you to bid wisely. 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan 

Great Teacher Onizuka

Recently I randomly bumped into watching a show in Youtube called “Great Teacher Onizuka” or Just GTO for short (watching it in Japanese with English subtitles) and it’s one of the more enjoyable and influential shows I’ve ever seen. It was great for learning Japanese, but really it didn’t need to be helpful for learning the language to be enjoyable. It’s just a really great show. It’s got an all-encompassing theme of how to be a great teacher, good lead actor with various minor characters, has subplots and comedic moments, and things that relate to real-life events. Basically, each episode this former gangster-turned teacher Onizuka Sensei (Mr. Onizuka) helps out a student in his misbehaved 2-4 high school class and teaches real life lessons rather than the pure academia that is thrust on high schoolers in Japan (and probably many other countries, for that matter). It’s like a nice blend of Karate Kid (Onizuka befriends his students) and Boston Public (show about teachers) in Japanese. Spoiler Alert: My favorite storyline was about a ditzy girl who was controlled by the “Mean Girls” faction of the class who talked to herself through a toy duck (perhaps a metaphor about being an ugly duckling but there were no Sparknotes to help me with the interpretation of certain themes) but then (at the urging of Onizuka Sensei) entered into a talent pageant where she discovered that she had to like herself more in order to respect herself, eventually going to a talent academy and appearing on TV, going onto bigger and better things. That’s gotta be one of the best feelings of being a teacher/parent, when your protégé/child who you believe in and have invested a lot of time/effort/emotional energy actually achieves his her potential. Just great.

Basically the highlight of my day for about a week and a half. Couldn’t wait to finish my work day to get home and watch it.

1.)    TV shows back in the day (even, I guess in foreign mediums) have their deficiencies but also have their charms. Because they didn’t worry about special effects, cinematography, and the latest gadgets of moviemaking/TV-making, they focused on things they could control, like, say….the plot???? Really I think that’s something modern TV shows can work on, although I understand their motivations: TV shows have to get picked up by television programs and make it through their pilot, and the main factors in doing so are usually 1.) what the audience wants, 2.) what big-name actors/actresses can we get people to get excited about a show, and 3.) what wild and crazy things can we do to separate ourselves from every other TV show? Notice that plot isn’t really in there; TV shows just aren’t made to tell a good story anymore, IMO (with rare exceptions of Breaking Bad, etc.)

2.)    When was the last great TV show about teachers? Glee? I don’t think that counts. Boston Public?  Didn’t really watch that show. Veronica Mars? I guess the American audience is tired of real life and is in a very fantasy-driven, vampires-dragons-zombies-magical powers stretch (See popular shows True Blood, Game of Thrones, Walking Dead, Once Upon a Time, and commercial success of Harry Potter, Hunger Games type movies)

3.)    I’ve always considered becoming a teacher, and this show really gave me insight into whether I should pursue that in the future or not. Obviously very dramatized, and didn’t really depict the day-to-day grind of what a teacher is like (in fact, Onizuka Sensei is often skipping class and doing things OTHER than teaching) but the effect on student’s lives and perception of adults rings true throughout the series and emphasizes the value of teaching, especially the value of a good teacher who can relate to his students.

4.)    I perceived this too when I was in high school, and now that my sister is in high school I’m reminded sometimes of this fact, but it’s tough to be a high schooler. People in high school are mean. The high school hierarchy is dominated by young adults who have the desire to become adults and do adult things but do not have the social ability to cope with all situations and haven’t developed the maturity to know what is right or wrong. Also, one’s self identity is often overly proportionate to how one fits into the social setting, where one or two bullies/”cool kids” have way too much control over others’ lives (whereas adults can just shrug it off and ignore people who they don’t like being around, high schoolers have to be in the same setting and attend the same classes and be around the same people all the time, as if it was a prison). Some kids are just downright mean, not necessarily because they are awful people but because that is the accepted way to deal with other people, or they are asserting social power without cognizance of its effect on others. Possibly the most difficult time in one’s life, and it’s really helpful if there is someone older who has gone through that (like Onizuka in the TV series) who can give helpful advice without inserting their own desires/ambitions for the child (like parents).

5.)    For those learning Japanese, this series was a great way to hone listening skills, especially casual conversation going at the normal rate of conversation for most Japanese. It is pretty fast, and I had to rewind several areas to get a good read on the exact words they were using, and even then I sometimes only picked up a few key words in a sentence, but it was definitely helpful, especially confirming that the colloquial terms and one-word phrases that one learns in textbooks actually are used by Japanese speakers (at least they did in 1998, when this TV series was one of the most-watched TV series in all of Japan). Also, it gave me a great lesson that I have to learn the conjugations of verbs, where I had skipped a lot of the tenses and conjugations of the verbs because I was lazy and felt like I could do it later, listening confirmed that you have to have knowledge of these tenses or else you don’t understand what people are saying, or what they are referring to. It’s just like English, French, Spanish, all these romance languages (but not Chinese, where it’s not especially important): there’s a reason all these language schools teach the conjugations and drill them home.

Anyway, happy viewing! 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan 

Bargain Hunting

I learned from an early age to try to save money, be frugal, get a deal when you can, and the values of hard work. I don’t like splurging for things, I try to keep costs under control, and feel good about myself when I feel like I’ve saved myself some money. The most important catalyst to my bargain-hunting (spendthrift ways, Scroogey lifestyle, whatever you want to call it) is this thought: How much I have to work in order to recooperate the cost of whatever I’m buying. Usually that scares me out of buying anything over $100 (unless it’s like, paying taxes or something) and definitely gives me pause to buy things I don’t really need, especially at this early stage of my career and when my student loans haven’t been completely paid off yet.

I’m actually very surprised now that I’m an adult how many expenditures there are in one’s life, and I’m still single! (imagine starting a family and haven’t to spend for yourself AND other people!) Not even speaking of the discretionary expenses in my life like fantasy sports, dodgeball, charity donations, etc., there’s still the fixed matter of rent, car insurance, transportation costs (gas, train fare, etc.) food, health insurance, doctor visits, education costs, utility fees, etc., etc. That already takes a huge cut out of one’s budget, not to mention things most people have to have like pets, newspapers, internet, cell phones, TV, all of that. Without getting some bargains, these costs just become too much! So without further ado, here are Robert’s Excellent sources of every day bargain hunting:

Food: It may not seem like it, but if you only pay $5 for the same sandwich at a food truck or grocery store that you would have paid $10 at a fancy restaurant, that $5 adds up for 3 meals a day, 21 meals a week, that could be $100 per week!

Airline tickets: book early; compare. Lotsa choices here, I suggest booking through Southwest or any airlines that let you change flights without a cancellation fee because you can book as early as you want, so book it even if you have doubts whether you will actually make that trip because you can always cancel later and select another flight. What these bargains don’t have in frequency (like food) they make up in savings per time: you could save hundreds of dollars. THAT adds up.

Be nice to your parents: believe or not, can save a lot of money from 1.) living near your parents and 2.) visiting them often, which requires you to be on good terms with them. Parents aren’t like (even the closest of ) friends; they’ll always forgive you, they’ll always loan you money, they’ll always cook you food, they’ll always let you sleep in your old room, they’ll always let you do laundry. Maybe I’ve lucked out on these aspects of parenting, but I’m pretty sure that’s universal. Sure, there’s some trade-offs like you gotta actually talk to them and be cordial, but a small price to pay.

Tickets to shows/sports games:  don’t get the most expensive seats. Most stadiums are worth going to just for the experience of having been once to an iconic ballpark or being able to say “I’ve been there,” and then every time after that you can just watch on TV. The VIP seats aren’t all that much better and you’re still watching the same game. I can’t say the same about music performances or rock concerts other than orchestra concerts, and I can assure you definitely that you can hear pretty much the same classical music whether you’re high in the rafters or down next to the stage. You don’t really want to be too close when I’m playing a musical instrument, neither. Just trust me.

Bananas and water: bananas are like 30 cents each. They’re much better filling-wise than Oreos, chips, pretzels, protein bars, milk shakes, granola bars, cereal, dried seaweed, and any other kind of snack that you can think of, and probably less expensive. In that sense bananas replace a lot of high-priced time waster foods that aren’t part of your 3 meals a day and prevents you from wanting those things by making you less hungry. Water replaces a huge supply of liquids like energy drinks, Gatorade, tea, coffee, lattes, protein shakes, juice, but it is very efficient, does the job better than any of those other things, and can be bought in bulk at a very low rate. Obviously if everyone adhered to the Robert Yan Bargain Hunting Code of Ethics, Nabisco, Starbucks, and several other Fortune 500 companies would go bankrupt, but on the flip side a lot of common people would have more money lining their pockets and… not go bankrupt.

Bargain hunting is huge in fantasy football drafts, ESPECIALLY in an auction league (literally have to squeeze pennies, not waste a dollar). My strategy in auction drafts has always been to be a price enforcer, and I’ve never gone into a draft thinking I will NEVER draft that guy under any circumstances or I HAVE to draft a certain player regardless of the circumstances; I always keep an open mind and have a bottom price set for almost all players where if that player is going less than that, I’ll always bid another dollar just because that player’s going way too cheap. That is definitely a great way to get bargains in auction drafts, when guys are going too cheap just because their perceived value by the general market (or the people in your league) has fallen so low that it is much lower than their actual value.

Like most years, finding bargains involves a mix of 1.) avoiding players who are too “hyped,” 2.) finding players who have solid skills and track record but have gotten the perceived “boring” tag, 3.) understanding that you may be wrong sometimes but eventually if you pick bargains long enough you’ll save money in the long run, and 4.) my old tried and true, finding guys on less “public teams” or flashy rosters. (My “Portland Trail Blazers” or “Tampa Rays” rule).

1.)    LeSean McCoy: of all the rock-solid QB’s, this guy was a top-3 consensus pick last year and has the same talent surrounding him coming back, with no injury risk and still youth (he’s actually younger than CJ Spiller).  

2.)    Roddy White/Andre Johnson: disrespected because of their perceived advanced age, these guys are some of the best catchers of the ball I have seen and modern-day “locks.” Roddy White has NEVER missed a game since he started his career and Andre Johnson is a lock every year of a 100-catch, 1300-yard rate. And they’re the No. 10 and 11 wideouts in the preseason behind…….Randall Cobb?

3.)    Whenever Matthew Berry or other fantasy football analysts start “falling in love” with  a player and touting them relentlessly, I know it’s time to grab other guys that they don’t talk about. I actually do take note of guys who frequently appear on “Fantasy Focus” podcasts or offseason trade chatter, just because any kind of news about a player tends to raise their public awareness, and the more the public is aware about a player (not even good news, just any kind of news) their stock goes up. That’s why I go for the “non-mentioned” guys. No news is good news; they just quietly go about their business putting up the numbers. Tony Romo is that guy for QB’s this year. Eli Manning is that guy. A small blip last year doesn’t take away all the 4000 yard, 30-TD seasons he had before.

4.)    Jason Witten: proven production, proven quarterback, proven system, proven ability to catch like 90 passes and 1000 yards. Just go with what works; don’t fix what ain’t broke.

5.)    Ryan Mathews: so many people hate him it’s become personal/emotional/unhealthy. He’s still the “bellcow” back in an OK offense who’s still young and has shown breakaway and catching ability. It’s like when a stock has dropped 200% on the stock market, or a March 2009-type buying opportunity: his stock’s never gonna be lower.

FFantasize on, 

Robert Yan  

It's Not Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Never saw the show that inspired this post, btw. 

This is my 4^th week in Philadelphia now and it’s been quite a ride. I work in downtown Philadelphia, so it’s a lot like downtown LA or a lot of other downtowns I’ve been through: the mornings are bustling with businesspeople and white-collar workers commuting to work (I walk to work from my temporary apartment and there’s actually a lot of foot traffic, I feel like I need a honk or turn signal sometimes to indicate my intentions). There’s a nice statue of William Penn overlooking the city like the iconic religious figure in Rio de Janiero overlooking the city (a quick Google search indicates that it’s Christ the Redeemder), and there are really nice parts of the city, like the historic Franklin Square and Museum strip,  comparable to D.C.’s National Mall area (except the museums aren’t free).

It really hasn’t been as hot as I expected…..I figured I’d been spoilt in LA for 5 years so living in other cities during the summer would be brutally insufferable, but it’s been relatively good, not too much humidity, not too many 90+ days. Maybe it just speaks to the extreme weather patterns in Chicago that I remember as a youth.

The problem is, and I feel like a lot of cities are like this (a quick train ride through parts of Baltimore confirmed this) is that outside the city center large areas are……. What’s the word? --- dilapidated. Old buildings that look like they’re crumbling or survived multiple earthquakes, dark allies that are very dirty and unkempt, whole neighborhoods that just do not look pleasant to live in.

The great thing about Philadelphia though is its proximity to other cities. A quick train ride down to Baltimore/Washington, D.C., and almost equidistant to NYC, very close to Jersey/Atlantic City and even a reasonable distance from Toronto/Pittsburgh.

As is my tradition I visited the conjoining universities that are located in Philly, UPenn and Drexel, adjacent to each other. Very east coasty; I could have seen myself living there. One visit I would not recommend unless you’re mentally and physically prepared for it is a bike trip to Valley Forge. Certainly a worthy place to visit and brimming with history and landmarks, but not something you need to take a 20-mile bike ride to go to. Big mistake; the scenery was nice for about 3 miles but then it just turned into old country roads; I was sore the next day. Nah. You also got plenty of stuff to do in the city, like the huge LOVE sign (almost forgot that this was the City of Brotherly Love), the rebuilt Lincoln Financial Field home of the Eagles (nice modern stadium and a sleeper team to rebound in the NFL) and the Liberty Bill/Constitution Hall, which are brief reminders that this city relies heavily on tourist attractions involving Revolution War and Founding Father days, including a large reverence towards Benjamin Franklin. Man that guy shows up everywhere, including random guys dressed like him in the street.

Why are there so many horseback carriage rides offered? Don’t get that. Seems really princess-y and old relic-y especially in the modern day of Iphones and Ipads.

Meanwhile during the 3 weeks I’ve been here, lots going on in fantasy baseball, and a lot of unheralded guys making it feel like “The Summer of Esteban Loaiza,” or “The Summer of Rondell White,” guys we never hear from again.

Oldie but Goodie: Alfonso Soriano had a week that was out of this world after he got traded back to the Yankees, channeling the early 2000’s Alfonso Soriano  and batting .600 with like 5 HR’s and 18 RBI’s in a 4 game stretch in mid-August. Maybe he just likes playing for the Yankees.

The Post-Hype prospect: Andrew Cashner is now 2.45 and 1.03 in his last 5 starts. The man can throw a fastball.

The “Who is this guy?” R. Grossman: No, not Rex Grossman, Robbie Grossman, hitting .342 with 16-4-18-4 in his last 30 games  for the Team where Fantasy production goes to die Houston, almost as good as Will Venable, .380-18-7-13-6, good for 4^th in the whole fantasy world in the last month. Wow.

Finally, meet the  “Rosses,”: Tyson Ross, Ross Ohlendorf, Cody Ross, and Ross Detweiler. Tyson has been an excellent pitcher for the last month or so, Ross Ohlendorf is an Ivy League grad who has some great matchups left in the National League East, Cody and Detwiler are on the DL but almost make solid contributions when healthy.

I know fantasy football is coming. The Fantasy Football Zoo or some other form of prognostication will be here soon. Stay tuned! 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan 

Tugging at the Heartstrings: 19 Years of Playing the Violin.

19 years or so ago I started playing the violin at my father's suggestion (insistence). I didn’t like to play violin when I was a kid. I didn’t like going to violin lessons, I didn’t like going to violin recitals, I didn’t like carrying my violin around all the time. I especially didn’t really (and still don’t) understand musical theory and had no desire to learn.  I mostly did it to appease my parents, who were insistent on my musical education. Having just completed my 2^nd concert with the Lawyers Philharmonic yesterday at the Walt Disney Hall in Downtown LA, I thought of things that I might say to my kid self about violin.

1.)    Don’t do anything just because your parents want you to do it. Re-evaluate, consider where they are coming from, consider your own desires, and then come to an informed, reasonable decision.

2.)    Once you’re old enough you can dictate your own practice time and “when you feel like” playing. It’s a great feeling to have a violin around when the mood strikes your fancy!

3.)    One day you will play violin voluntarily, without any want of career aspirations or monetary gain, but simply because you enjoy it.

4.)    You will come to appreciate the sense of musical unity that comes with playing in an orchestra of amateur but advanced-level musicians, one that can produce beautiful music that inspires.

5.)    You will get a sense of gratification from inviting family and friends to a concert and proud of yourself, adding to your self-esteem and your satisfaction that your parents are proud of you.

6.)    Unlike in middle school or high school where it was more of a crutch (sign of a nerd) than a boon, later on in life in professional circles you will be admired (at least from what people say) for being able to play an instrument.

7.)    It is a great way to meet other lawyers/musicians who share their interests.

8.)    You can play the Game of Thrones theme on your violin at will.

9.)    Playing at a great concert hall like Walt Disney Hall (shaped like a piano which accounts for the improved resonance) is an honor and one of my life achievements, and you’ll be glad you were able to do it. Twice.

All great reasons for having kept up with the violin and still playing strong 10 years removed! 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan 

Baseball Stadium Trip

Recently I’ve been planning a trip in late August/early September that takes me to 11 different baseball stadiums in 2 week. It’s an ambitious journey, but one that I’ve wanted to do for awhile. The stadiums themselves aren’t necessarily the only motivation; I do have visiting all baseball parks on my bucket list, but also hitting the road is quite big.

A big part of me is a traveler. I’ve wanted to get away, do new things, go on the road. I get antsy when I’m in the same spot for too long, whether it’s for hours in a day, or weeks in a year, or years in a life. (For example, I get antsy about doing one project over and over again in a year, and I get antsy about having lived in L.A. for 5 years now-I might need a change). I think the main motivation for that feeling is a fear that life is passing me by, that if I don’t change it up and do something new I won’t be able to experience that for much longer. Maybe it’s stored memory from a past life (lives) telling me life is short. Whatever the reason, I’ve always wanted to get out there. I get excited about stories like 50 states and 50 jobs guy (see previous post) and am intrigued by “A Walk in the Woods” by Bill Bryson, about traveling the Applacchian Trail. My favorite part of “Forrest Gump” is when he runs across the country. I was a big fan of Amazing Race for many years. I like the adventure; I like the sense of not knowing what one might run it (cue Forrest Gump’s “life’s like a box of chocolates; you never know what you’re gonna get” line)

Speaking of going on an adventure, whatever happened to the “Choose Your Own Adventure” franchise books? That’s an aspect of the 90’s that might go completely forgotten, but those were excellent. It’s a great idea for a book, and especially in this era where people want instantaneous gratification and a lot of choice in what they do, a book/story/app that lets you “form your own story” would be very interesting and might just be heralded as “certified fresh” like on Rotten Tomatoes.

The Ipad is addicting. I once rejected the Ipad on this blog as nothing but another computer, but I’ve come to realize it’s more than that. The Ipad doesn’t weigh as much, plays High-definition videos, and just feels more slick and unique. You know how “Facebook”’s biggest move was going from “The Facebook” to just “Facebook?” Apple’s equivalent might be its sleek design, the black flat screen with a white trim, very simple and attractive for users. Great foresight by Steve Jobs. Certainly the Ipad still has limitations, and I’m not going to swear by it and advocate that everyone use one because it can actually be pretty addicting, but it certainly has some unique features.  

My Ruby Sparks

Just caught a movie last night called “Ruby Sparks” (2012, stars Paul Dano) that was not only very good and very smart ( in the category of “Safety Not Guaranteed”) but also brought up some very interesting themes that got me thinking.

The movie’s about a writer that writes about a girl who he falls in love with, and then that girl suddenly just appears in his apartment one day as his girlfriend. Better yet, he has the power to change her by writing about her. Awesome premise, right?

1.)    The movie’s really good, and definitely worth a watch. Set in Los Angeles, the writer mentioned that it was the ideal set because one can feel “isolated” in LA and alone even though there’s so many people and things around. And I can relate to that; one can get lost in the hustle and bustle of the city or any of the other various cultures in the L.A. area. You can lose your identity (kind of how the girl in this movie did).

2.)    If you knew you had the power to change your girlfriend, would you? It’s like a Pandora’s Box, though and definitely illicts themes of playing God, and the movie deals great with that.

3.)    On top of having that power, what a lucky guy to just have a girlfriend….no need to go on dates, no need to make the first contact, start conversation…….that’s really my biggest problem (along with a lot of other problems). I’ve always believed that if someone got to know me they’d know I’m a good person. That doesn’t necessarily reflect, though, just walking down the street or sitting at work or something when I have a near-frown on my face and am not making jokes and “revealing my true self.”

4.)    The movie at its core is about true love and finding it/producing it yourself, as well as ideas of “you can create your ideal love partner and tell her to love you back, but that’s not truly what love is.” The actors/ actresses in the movie, Paul Dano and Zoe Kagan, who are actually together in real life, do a great job of expressing this kind of love and show that they are happy together (well, most of the time throughout this book). The Japanese have a term (well, more than just one term, and other cultures/languages have similar terms too) called “kataomoi,” or unrequited love. (Japanese lesson of the day). I have yet to experience this and more research (preferably hands-on/case-study) must be done.

5.)    This movie is exactly why I can’t watch romantic comedies anymore. It’s not they’re bad movies; I actually think that some of them are done pretty well. It’s just that every time the story becomes loving and love gets in the air, I’m reminded of my own situation. Especially upsetting in this movie was that the writer was a recluse who only talked to his brother and his psychiatrist at the beginning of the movie; I actually get out there and try to talk to women but with apparently less success than the writer. Sigh.

With that said, I did 2 editions of “Ruby Sparks for myself, or in the baseball version, “Brucey Sharks.” You’ll see what it’s about. (This is basically a version of me trying to copy what the movie did, as I’m sure many people, although I guess they only took in $2 million+ box office in the U.S.     

I met “Hannah Wu” at a volunteer event for kids with disabilities. We immediately hit it off, talking about what camps we had worked for before. We laughed as we shared jokes about what our Asian parents are like and how they’d be happy each of us had met someone who was of the same race and could speak Mandarin. I apologetically mentioned that she was a lawyer, to which she replied it was OK because she was tired of talking to marketing majors anyway. As with most people in the LA area, she had gone to UCLA but really didn’t care that I went to USC law school. We appreciated going to the Getty Center/ Santa Monica Pier/ Griffith Park/ movies/ dinners/parties/Angels baseball games, but also other unique things like my orchestra concerts and dodgeball games, her product launches and dance performances. It was just a great summer of fun that turned into the fall and the winter, and then suddenly we realized we were very happy together and traveled throughout the world. Sigh.

OK, here’s the real fantasy: I met “Brucey Sharks” on the waiver wire of my 14-team USC Law keeper league, my most competitive league and the one I care the most about (and haven’t won). Brucey was a less-heralded prospect who had been a serviceable player in the big leagues for about 3 years for a small-market team but hadn’t attracted much attention from fantasy managers, having shown some signs of power, avg., and speed. The big breakout came after the All-Star Break when he started on a tear with several multi-hit games and “Combo Meals” (stolen base and home run) at which point we started a relationship. A week in, Brucey was moved to the 3^rd spot in the lineup for his real MLB team and added more runs because of his lineup protection. I rejected legitimate offers for Brucey in the face of many experts’ projected regression. Brucey’s hot streak never fizzled, lasting into September and the fantasy playoffs when in the Semifinals, on Sunday night Baseball, Brucey scored 3 runs and hit an 8^th-inning, matchup-clinching 3-run homer off of the best pitcher in the league that miraculously gave me the win over my archrival and propelling me to my first Fantasy Baseball championship ever. Brucey was named the MVP of my season despite being added after the All-Star Break and became my perennial fantasy sweetheart. Sigh.

Fantasize on (literally),

                Robert Yan