Friday, December 27, 2013

"How to Make a Good Movie," or “My Obsession with Zooey Deschanel”


I don’t understand why movies are bad nowadays. On Christmas Eve I just watched one of my favorite movies ever, “Elf.” Have seen it like 7 times, never gets tiring. Here’s what we can learn about making a good movie from “Elf”:

1.) Try to be the definitive movie of a genre like Christmas. That way you’re a timeless classic. For me, Elf has transcended Home Alone 2 and How the Grinch Stole Christmas as the definitive Christmas movie and will probably stay at the top of the list barring another movie barging in.
2.) Have smart, witty humor. Audiences are smart. They understand jokes and inside jokes. To me humor is like a work of art: you can mold it over time, you can do various things with it, you can try to appeal to various tastes. However, in those 90 minutes or so you can mold a lot of jokes and situational humor in there, and common folk like me are going to appreciate it.
3.) Good music accompanying the movie. For “Elf” it’s the built-in Christmas songs, but they’re well mixed in like during a nice progression scene or used to
4.) Have the montage of scenes of people doing various things/highlight reel. Boy do I love those scenes. They show a lot of things going on in one’s life/the story in a short amount of time
5.) Have a heartwarming story. Obviously depends on what genre you’re going for, but a tried and true method of making a movie is just have a story that makes sense and is uplifting. I mean, it doesn’t take a genius to come up with, “Orphan adopted by Santa Clause, raised by Elves, tries to fit into real world at age 30 looking for long-lost father.” There’s a lot of stuff that can go from there, and lots of them end in a happy ending.
6.) Creativity. That is something that captures my interest right away. I mean, I think what Hollywood is missing sometimes is just originality. I can see the executives/suits in the studios right now looking at performance reviews and revenue charts and spreadsheets as to what works, and so you have all these prequels, sequels, remakes, copycat movies, etc., etc. that will make money but don’t tell a good story. Fortunately there are still some producers/moviemakers out there that will just try to make a good movie and bring something fresh and new to the table.
7.) Have Zooey Deschanel in the movie. That’s a joke. But she’s an example of a very classy-looking, attractive girl with great singing voice, no outside drama in her personal life, great female lead to match with any of your male leads. Appeals to various audiences: guys love her because she’s attractive and the girl next door, girls like her cuz she’s a strong woman who can sing and always looks put together, (doesn’t do nude scenes), parents like her because she’s a good influence…….put her in any real-life kind of movie and you’re going to get the right type of audience to watch. Same applies for Joseph Gordon-Levitt and a bunch of other actors/actresses.

Also, most of this list comprised of me watching not just “Elf” but also “500 Days of Summer,” (set in LA, among many movies where I've idenitified with the surrounding scenery) 2 guilty pleasures I admit to having watched multiple times. I look forward to more of those types of movies (and I’m not just talking about romantic comedies, but I do like them) coming out using my advice!
I think it’s a great idea to have an outdoor ice skating arena in the middle of downtown Los Angeles. I’ve never went there, but I think I will in the near future. It’s very nostalgic and brings thoughts of holding a woman’s hand while skiing and a “suga-sugashii” (refreshing in Japanese) feel reflecting off the ice in the coolness of winter (although it was like 65 degrees today in LA). Perfect for Midwesterners/east coasters in LA who long for the coolness of  back home. It's like a winter fantasyland. (Fantaji tochi or ファンタジー土地 in Japanese)

Fantasize on (Dewa, Jaa mata),

Robert Yan

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