I'm not the biggest fan of nighttime. I hated walking home in the dark as a kid because I was scared of evil monsters popping out, and as an adult nighttime is like the big, bad wolf that creeps up every day to take all the sunny views away, especially in the winter when it gets dark at 4:30PM.
What the dark does do, however, is to give 2 views of the same landmark/ tourist attraction: the day view and the night view.
San Francisco has some great views that I didn't know about. Especially because it's such a hilly city with so many dips, peaks, and valleys, every street can give way to going up a massive hill for a view of the city. The best view MJ and I got this trip, however, was from Twin Peaks overlooking the entire city (can see both the Bay Bridge and the Golden Gate Bridge, and everything in between) and the vista point right off the Golden Gate Bridge. Has anyone marveled before at how awesome the Golden Gate Bridge is night. Sure the orange hue stands out even in the day, but at night it's doubly impressive, almost flashing in the dark as a beacon of San Francisco's skyline. (Unfortunately also a beacon for some poor souls planning to commit suicide).
The Palace of Fine Arts is just another cool-looking thing to pass over on the way over the Golden Gate Bridge most times, and I've literally ran by it before without giving it much thought, but at night it's absolutely dazzling. From inside it looks like a magical palace from the iconic scene in Aladdin where the prince whisks Jasmine away to show her a whole new world (Remember that scene?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeDYx7Tkc7I) From outside it looks even more Disney-esque, with the surrounding pond making it look like a setup for a show of "Fantasmic" at Walt Disneyland.
Not to compare cities and be jealous, but L.A. just doesn't measure up in terms of night attractions, IMO. Lala Land plays up the Hermosa Beach Pier and Griffith Observatory as popular destinations to go for Yakei, but that's about it......the ocean is not nearly as majestic or visible at night. Hollywood Bowl is closed, Getty Center is closed.....no wonder everyone just heads to the bars and the Hollywood scene after dark, there's no natural scenery.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Tuesday, November 28, 2017
Monday, November 27, 2017
Peaceful (長閑 [のどか (nodoka)
I'm a "Hustle" kind of guy: if I was on the latest season of Survivor: Healers v hustlers v heroes, I'd be a hustler. I live a hustle and bustle kind of live by trying to squeeze every minute out of life and not waste any seconds of the day, to the point of upsetting people around me because I expect the same thing from them. One of the weaknesses of my approach is that i never seem satisfied with the current state, have to always be learning, working out, have to always find a different lane than the current one to get somewhere faster.
Which is why sometimes it's nice to see the exact opposite, peaceful people, animals, and things, basically all sorts of living beings being calm and at peace with their lives and showing that off to the world.
Mj and I have a friend who hosts parties and invites a couple with a baby boy, I'm not even sure of the child's name but he is the epitome of "peaceful," the way he sits and stares at his parents and other guests or eats his food docilely, he just seems so content with life and being in this world with us. His presence along allows MJ and I to be more at peace (it's the contagious effect of being at peace)
Walking dogs might seem like the opposite of peacefulness, but some dogs are able to strut around after doing their business and just take a stroll around the neighborhood. Mj and I were allowed the privilege of walking an elderly dog around the neighborhood and she just kept at a leisurely pace, not once requiring us to pull back in the leash, just sniffing and walking like she was meant to do in this world. No barking or violent activities, just slow movements. A very peaceful dog, which was emphasized by her lying down later on to take a nap. Most living things all look peaceful when sleeping, but sometimes a dog's sleeping posture makes me giggle and want to pet them.
Holidays, especially winter holidays where the weather slows things down and prohibits many activities, is a great chance for peaceful times. Sitting at home reading a book, taking a peaceful hike through the woods with spectacular views, these are all elements of a peaceful life, and something to be thankful for.
Happy thanksgiving! May peace be with you!
Which is why sometimes it's nice to see the exact opposite, peaceful people, animals, and things, basically all sorts of living beings being calm and at peace with their lives and showing that off to the world.
Mj and I have a friend who hosts parties and invites a couple with a baby boy, I'm not even sure of the child's name but he is the epitome of "peaceful," the way he sits and stares at his parents and other guests or eats his food docilely, he just seems so content with life and being in this world with us. His presence along allows MJ and I to be more at peace (it's the contagious effect of being at peace)
Walking dogs might seem like the opposite of peacefulness, but some dogs are able to strut around after doing their business and just take a stroll around the neighborhood. Mj and I were allowed the privilege of walking an elderly dog around the neighborhood and she just kept at a leisurely pace, not once requiring us to pull back in the leash, just sniffing and walking like she was meant to do in this world. No barking or violent activities, just slow movements. A very peaceful dog, which was emphasized by her lying down later on to take a nap. Most living things all look peaceful when sleeping, but sometimes a dog's sleeping posture makes me giggle and want to pet them.
Holidays, especially winter holidays where the weather slows things down and prohibits many activities, is a great chance for peaceful times. Sitting at home reading a book, taking a peaceful hike through the woods with spectacular views, these are all elements of a peaceful life, and something to be thankful for.
Happy thanksgiving! May peace be with you!
Wednesday, November 22, 2017
Badgers in the same hole (同じ穴の狢)
One of my favorite Japanese proverbs is "Onaji ana no mujina," or badgers in the same hole. Badgers are a notoriously deceptive animal in Japanese lore, and usually associated with performing bad deeds or even criminal behavior, so it's usually a negative nuance attached to it like "thick as thieves," differentiating it from the pretty neutral "birds of a feather flock together."
I recently got a jaywalking ticket in downtown Los Angeles (of all things, jaywalking!) for starting to walk into a crosswalk while the light was flashing red and not the white "walk" sign. A very arcane and rarely enforced rule, I was so surprised and bewildered when the police officer stopped me and asked for my driver's license. There are so many people in L.A. who begin crossing on the red flashing sign like I did, yet I was unlucky (and oblivious enough) to get caught by what was essentially a jaywalking sting operation (the officer was there to hand out jaywalking tickets and caught 3 more people on the sidewalk in the time I took to even sort out the confusion).
The fine was just under $200 (!) I decided to fight the ticket, which led me to Metropolitan courthouse (conveniently located near my home) and arrived at the scheduled court time........only to find about 70 people waiting for the same courthouse to open, all with varying traffic violations that they wished to fight (or plead guilty to and pay the fine and just get the hell out of there). I felt as close to going into jail that I ever hope to be, ushered like cattle into a small room functioning as a courthouse with other people who had committed traffic violations, forced by the police officer running the proceedings to sit in a row of chairs so tight it was impossible to move without touching one's neighbor. It really felt like we were snuggled up like badgers in the same hole, caught with nowhere to go.
After an hour of sitting waiting for everyone else's cases to be processed, the arraignment judge finally got out of his chambers, like the Man Behind the Curtain in the Wizard of Oz. What followed was a 40 hour blitz of why those of us in the courtroom were inferior species to him and deserved to suffer. Phones were not allowed. Reading material was not allowed, the judge wanted everyone's full attention on him at all times. The judge in a full hour of talking never smiled once, never changed expression really, and never stuttered or used any "um's or ah's...." really pretty impressive, like a drill sargeant barking out orders. (He actually used the words "do an about face" during his speech). The judge made us feel like we had made the worst decisions of our lives, that we couldn't worm our way out of the horrible crimes that we committed, only by changing our behavior on the road would we ever be absolved of our crimes. "You are here to prevent you from ending up in the HOSPITAL OR THE MORGUE!" Fire and Fury! (from Game of Thrones and Donald Trump) was all I could think of in my head. Really, some of these people were guilty of having forgotten their driver's license at home, or not having a taillight fixed, and in my case being 3 seconds late walking into a crosswalk, yet here we were all listening for 40 minutes about how we MUST pay the fine for our miserable deeds because the courts could attach a lien to a judgment against us. (I mean, some people had a $35 fine, I think they'll be able to pay.....?)
I think personally that the whole episode was meant to scare us common folk into pleading guilty and just paying the fine. The judge was clearly pro-law enforcement indicating that we had no excuses and law enforcement must have had a good reason to stop us and pull us over, and honestly if I knew my trial would be in front of this judge I would have pleaded guilty then and there. Luckily this was just the arraignment and I was just scheduling my case to another time, but unluckily it took four hours just to say "plead not guilty." Something about the court system is really screwed up and distorted, really, when a 3 second mishap about an arcane rule can lead to 4 hours of just sitting around listening to a ranting judge literally judging us for our behavior, and that's just the arraignment stage! Anyone would crack and just pay the fine, but the fine is hundreds of dollars! Just totally encouraging a donation to law enforcement and the government. There's something wrong about that for the common person. It's just so hard to be a common person, trying to go about your day and then getting hit with a fine or violation that you need to fight in court that takes hours to go through the processing. we may be badgers from the same hole but even badgers deserve fair treatment.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
I recently got a jaywalking ticket in downtown Los Angeles (of all things, jaywalking!) for starting to walk into a crosswalk while the light was flashing red and not the white "walk" sign. A very arcane and rarely enforced rule, I was so surprised and bewildered when the police officer stopped me and asked for my driver's license. There are so many people in L.A. who begin crossing on the red flashing sign like I did, yet I was unlucky (and oblivious enough) to get caught by what was essentially a jaywalking sting operation (the officer was there to hand out jaywalking tickets and caught 3 more people on the sidewalk in the time I took to even sort out the confusion).
The fine was just under $200 (!) I decided to fight the ticket, which led me to Metropolitan courthouse (conveniently located near my home) and arrived at the scheduled court time........only to find about 70 people waiting for the same courthouse to open, all with varying traffic violations that they wished to fight (or plead guilty to and pay the fine and just get the hell out of there). I felt as close to going into jail that I ever hope to be, ushered like cattle into a small room functioning as a courthouse with other people who had committed traffic violations, forced by the police officer running the proceedings to sit in a row of chairs so tight it was impossible to move without touching one's neighbor. It really felt like we were snuggled up like badgers in the same hole, caught with nowhere to go.
After an hour of sitting waiting for everyone else's cases to be processed, the arraignment judge finally got out of his chambers, like the Man Behind the Curtain in the Wizard of Oz. What followed was a 40 hour blitz of why those of us in the courtroom were inferior species to him and deserved to suffer. Phones were not allowed. Reading material was not allowed, the judge wanted everyone's full attention on him at all times. The judge in a full hour of talking never smiled once, never changed expression really, and never stuttered or used any "um's or ah's...." really pretty impressive, like a drill sargeant barking out orders. (He actually used the words "do an about face" during his speech). The judge made us feel like we had made the worst decisions of our lives, that we couldn't worm our way out of the horrible crimes that we committed, only by changing our behavior on the road would we ever be absolved of our crimes. "You are here to prevent you from ending up in the HOSPITAL OR THE MORGUE!" Fire and Fury! (from Game of Thrones and Donald Trump) was all I could think of in my head. Really, some of these people were guilty of having forgotten their driver's license at home, or not having a taillight fixed, and in my case being 3 seconds late walking into a crosswalk, yet here we were all listening for 40 minutes about how we MUST pay the fine for our miserable deeds because the courts could attach a lien to a judgment against us. (I mean, some people had a $35 fine, I think they'll be able to pay.....?)
I think personally that the whole episode was meant to scare us common folk into pleading guilty and just paying the fine. The judge was clearly pro-law enforcement indicating that we had no excuses and law enforcement must have had a good reason to stop us and pull us over, and honestly if I knew my trial would be in front of this judge I would have pleaded guilty then and there. Luckily this was just the arraignment and I was just scheduling my case to another time, but unluckily it took four hours just to say "plead not guilty." Something about the court system is really screwed up and distorted, really, when a 3 second mishap about an arcane rule can lead to 4 hours of just sitting around listening to a ranting judge literally judging us for our behavior, and that's just the arraignment stage! Anyone would crack and just pay the fine, but the fine is hundreds of dollars! Just totally encouraging a donation to law enforcement and the government. There's something wrong about that for the common person. It's just so hard to be a common person, trying to go about your day and then getting hit with a fine or violation that you need to fight in court that takes hours to go through the processing. we may be badgers from the same hole but even badgers deserve fair treatment.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Monday, November 20, 2017
Actual Tasting of Food (実食)
The Japanese have a word for a concept that English hasn't caught onto yet: Actually tasting a food that you've heard so much about, and presumably judging the food to see if it matches the hype. Raise your hand if you live in L.A. and have heard about an exotic-sounding food (i.e. shark-fin soup! alligator tacos!), usually with ethnic origins (dim-sum, Mediterranean, Italian sausage) that is ONLY AVAILABLE in a secluded area of the city that's hard to get to, there is always a line that forms, or you have to get there before a certain time of the day to have a chance to get it, or you have to get into an online raffle just to get a chance to purchase tickets (Actually, that's Hamilton, and I'm just bitter I'm 0 for 25 in attempts to win their lottery), so that it's almost difficult to actually taste the food.
MJ and I tried to get into Howlin' Rays (in Chinatown, mentioned before) to actually taste their hot chicken and see what the hype was about, the chicken was right there before our eyes, there were people literally digging their eager hands into the chicken and biting down into the hot spiciness or spicy hotness whatever you want it, it was so close we could touch it ourselves.........but so was a line curling out the door into the local plaza and approximately 2 hours long. No thanks.
Life is all about new experiences, which is what drives the travel industry, the social recreational sports industry (dodgeball, softball, kickball, etc.), the online dating industry, the TV industry, etc., etc., but when it comes to food people go CRAZY to actually sample a food. A lot of times I've heard so much about a food that everyone's been raving about.....the first bite goes in, I'm ready to praise it and enter a whole new world of gourmet ecstasy, to savor something from the ends of the earth, and then........it's not what I expected. Let's take a few more bites. Nope, still tastes pretty common.....is it me? Are my taste buds dulled? And just after you admit the ugly truth to yourself that the taste is not that great, you then have to be considerate to others who came with you on this Actual-tasting ride: "OH great job guys!" Or if they happen to have a confused look or disappointed look on their face, "I agree, not amazing." and out of relief you can commiserate with said friend and say you got bamboozled.
Of course, there are also seldom times I am AMAZED by a food that I've been waiting for for a long time. (Usually it has to do with Italian places, like EATALY in downtown Chicago that is as far away from my parents' cooking as a kid as possible). Those times that the tasting goes awesome, I begrudgingly turn to MJ and go, "you were right, we were justified to wait that long to get this." MJ tends to apprecitae foods much more and be impressed by the actual tasting more than me, which makes me wonder if my taste buds have dulled or I'm spoiled in terms of food.
English should definitely come up with a similar "actual-tasting of a food" term though, like "taste implementing" or "hype bursting" or "taste hopping," something catchy, and it's not exactly like "wine tasting" or "bar hopping" where you're just randomly sampling wines, it has to be tasting food you got hyped about for a while, where the finally knowing about what this food is is half the battle, almost more than getting to taste the (presumably delicious food).
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
MJ and I tried to get into Howlin' Rays (in Chinatown, mentioned before) to actually taste their hot chicken and see what the hype was about, the chicken was right there before our eyes, there were people literally digging their eager hands into the chicken and biting down into the hot spiciness or spicy hotness whatever you want it, it was so close we could touch it ourselves.........but so was a line curling out the door into the local plaza and approximately 2 hours long. No thanks.
Life is all about new experiences, which is what drives the travel industry, the social recreational sports industry (dodgeball, softball, kickball, etc.), the online dating industry, the TV industry, etc., etc., but when it comes to food people go CRAZY to actually sample a food. A lot of times I've heard so much about a food that everyone's been raving about.....the first bite goes in, I'm ready to praise it and enter a whole new world of gourmet ecstasy, to savor something from the ends of the earth, and then........it's not what I expected. Let's take a few more bites. Nope, still tastes pretty common.....is it me? Are my taste buds dulled? And just after you admit the ugly truth to yourself that the taste is not that great, you then have to be considerate to others who came with you on this Actual-tasting ride: "OH great job guys!" Or if they happen to have a confused look or disappointed look on their face, "I agree, not amazing." and out of relief you can commiserate with said friend and say you got bamboozled.
Of course, there are also seldom times I am AMAZED by a food that I've been waiting for for a long time. (Usually it has to do with Italian places, like EATALY in downtown Chicago that is as far away from my parents' cooking as a kid as possible). Those times that the tasting goes awesome, I begrudgingly turn to MJ and go, "you were right, we were justified to wait that long to get this." MJ tends to apprecitae foods much more and be impressed by the actual tasting more than me, which makes me wonder if my taste buds have dulled or I'm spoiled in terms of food.
English should definitely come up with a similar "actual-tasting of a food" term though, like "taste implementing" or "hype bursting" or "taste hopping," something catchy, and it's not exactly like "wine tasting" or "bar hopping" where you're just randomly sampling wines, it has to be tasting food you got hyped about for a while, where the finally knowing about what this food is is half the battle, almost more than getting to taste the (presumably delicious food).
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Sunday, November 19, 2017
Pro Bono (プロボノ)
After a sustained time off from volunteering my services as an attorney, I was back at it on Wednesday! Attended the Monterrey Park Free Legal Clinic on Wednesday night geared towards low income citizens with legal questions and a limited proficiency in English. So basically, right up my alley: I got to use both my legal knowledge that I paid 3 years of law school tuition for and my inherent Mandarin Chinese language abilities. It is truly one of the more gratifying experiences to help someone who doesn't have the same abilities as me (basic understanding of the American legal system) or dual fluency in Mandarin and English. Really, that is what "work" was supposed to be originally: a trading of services using abilities that certain people possess and others don't, and trading for what you don't have. Then money got in the way and corrupted everything, and people like me have to chase whichever job pays the most money. It's also time: As I grow older I agree more and more with the phrase time= money, where life only has so many precious minutes and opportunities to create moments, and however you can save time at working and trying to earn money can lead to more opportunities to create those great moments.
Anyway, pro bono is so important in the legal industry because not everyone can afford to pay. The dirty secret for attorneys about how we're taught to think about clients and choosing who to sue/ represent: go for the guys with the deepest pockets, aka have a lot of money. It's a business that revolves around money. You have money, you can afford the best attorneys who can offer the best advice and an army of attorneys to mitigate your troubles (see Donald Trump). You don't have money, well, attorneys won't have much incentive to take your case, or do a good job at it. It's not like McDonald's where everyone can afford a $5 burger, or college where it's an investment in yourself so most people take the gamble of spending a lot of money to build a better future, lawsuits can be supremely costly and yet not have the benefits of things like health insurance and education. That's where pro bono comes in: the legal profession encourages lawyers to do pro bono on top of their normal business, in fact the Professional Code of California suggests every lawyer do 50 hours of pro bono every year (roughly an hour a week, which doesn't seem too bad). I unfortunately haven't met that in any of the 6 years I've been an attorney in the state of CA, and probably won't be able to, but if I feel needed and respected at legal clinics, I feel better about going. (At a lot of volunteer events and clinics, it feels like there are too many attorneys and a lot of just talking to each other,a lot of people are there just to be able to say that they volunteered, without much impact). When you do get to help someone in need, though, it makes you feel like a valued member of society, which is sometimes an even better feeling that earning money.
Free legal clinics also make me appreciate my status in life: As much as I worry about money or the future or possible legal problems, there are always people in worse positions, who don't even speak English, or don't know that they have been sued, or are taken advantage of by people with superior knowledge, so it is important not to always lament why I can't have a better life (actors, CEOs, etc.) and appreciate that I have freedoms more than most people. And I realize why pro bono is important: There are people who do get screwed over by big companies with aggressive attorneys, but they don't have money to pay legal fees, which doesn't mean their claim is any less meritorious, or they be afraid of seeking legal help because they're afraid it will cost them so much to even walk in the door and get a consultation. Free legal clinics at least can look at their case and point them in the right direction.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Anyway, pro bono is so important in the legal industry because not everyone can afford to pay. The dirty secret for attorneys about how we're taught to think about clients and choosing who to sue/ represent: go for the guys with the deepest pockets, aka have a lot of money. It's a business that revolves around money. You have money, you can afford the best attorneys who can offer the best advice and an army of attorneys to mitigate your troubles (see Donald Trump). You don't have money, well, attorneys won't have much incentive to take your case, or do a good job at it. It's not like McDonald's where everyone can afford a $5 burger, or college where it's an investment in yourself so most people take the gamble of spending a lot of money to build a better future, lawsuits can be supremely costly and yet not have the benefits of things like health insurance and education. That's where pro bono comes in: the legal profession encourages lawyers to do pro bono on top of their normal business, in fact the Professional Code of California suggests every lawyer do 50 hours of pro bono every year (roughly an hour a week, which doesn't seem too bad). I unfortunately haven't met that in any of the 6 years I've been an attorney in the state of CA, and probably won't be able to, but if I feel needed and respected at legal clinics, I feel better about going. (At a lot of volunteer events and clinics, it feels like there are too many attorneys and a lot of just talking to each other,a lot of people are there just to be able to say that they volunteered, without much impact). When you do get to help someone in need, though, it makes you feel like a valued member of society, which is sometimes an even better feeling that earning money.
Free legal clinics also make me appreciate my status in life: As much as I worry about money or the future or possible legal problems, there are always people in worse positions, who don't even speak English, or don't know that they have been sued, or are taken advantage of by people with superior knowledge, so it is important not to always lament why I can't have a better life (actors, CEOs, etc.) and appreciate that I have freedoms more than most people. And I realize why pro bono is important: There are people who do get screwed over by big companies with aggressive attorneys, but they don't have money to pay legal fees, which doesn't mean their claim is any less meritorious, or they be afraid of seeking legal help because they're afraid it will cost them so much to even walk in the door and get a consultation. Free legal clinics at least can look at their case and point them in the right direction.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Monday, November 13, 2017
Idol (アイドル)
I'm not talking about immunity idols (of which there are still plenty floating around on Survivor islands, I would still love to join!), I'm talking about entertainment idols, people who become stars due to their singing, rapping, dancing, etc. and attract a tight, passionate group of followers. There's a lot of things I like about Japanese and Korean culture, I've learned tons of unique ones as I've studied both languages the last several years, from samurai to temples to games to how they address elders to popular holidays that give the culture a flair I really appreciate, but one of the things I just can't appreciate or sympathize with is the obsession with idols.
Maybe it's because I recently went to a Japanese idol concert in West Hollywood at The Troubadour (a small room with a small stage with bar service trying to get as many people as they could to buy alcohol), an artist by the name of "Sky High," a stage name derived from his last name which roughly translated is "sky high." It was what could be expected, there was an opening act by another band that was equally as contrived and aroused my suspicions of lip-syncing, although I'm not an expert in that department by any means. Then when "Sky High came out with strobe lights shooting out, his female fans screamed and welcomed him with shrill shouts of ecstasy, like I imagine how Justin Bieber or Gavin DeGraw or any other famous male singer is introduced, except instead of thousands of fans at the Staples Center or Greek Theatre it was in front of a small circle of 20 diehards in West Hollywood (kind of sad really, but probably sadder that I paid to get into this show). He did a rap, had his backup dancers dance with him, played the piano, spoke to the audience in broken English during the breaks to catch his breath (he was dripping sweat towards the end from moving so much which I can empathize with but I imagine might DEMYSTIFY him for some of his female fans) and played an encore. Not bad really for a $32 show, but what I don't get is the attraction to become mega fans of this kind of show. I arrived an hour before the show time due to misunderstanding the start time (doors open means there's like an hour before they even begin, and that's just the opening act) where VIP guests were already waiting to get in to shake hands, take photos, and just be with SKY HI. They were so worried about getting to do this that they were rude to me in line for allegedly cutting them one space in line. Really? Aren't these idols all very similar? There wasn't anything particular special about SKY HI, maybe something about the lyrics that went too fast in Japanese for me to understand? (I can't even follow the lyrics for English songs most times)? He's really attractive? I feel like everything about Mr. SKY HI could be replaced by someone else pretty easily, from his very Asian hairstyle, his all-black outfit, his choreographed dance moves. Isn't there just another idol right around the corner? I guess we can all be replaced, sadly, who am I to say?
There's a very "otaku" culture in Japan and the same idea in other Asian cultures of being obsessive about certain things, and it can be very good for loyalty and devotion but dangerous in rejecting everything else and being so emotionally invested. That's why people get so upset about SMAP (Japanese equivalent of the Beatles) breaking up or some AKB48 (Akihabara 48, a Japanese girl idol group) member leaving. Really? What do these idols do for you, the fan? Sure they're saying, "I love you, LA!" but I'm sure they're saying "I love you New York, I love you Tokyo!" too, why the undying loyalty for mere entertainment? It's the same thing I guess with avid sports fans who live and die by their favorite sports team, they go to every game and feel like they're part of the team, even if the team loses all the time and doesn't care about its fans. At some point, don't you need some sort of reciprocation for all the love and energy you put into it? Music groups move on and break up all the time (sports teams lose and suck for years and years at a time or never win the championship) without blinking an eye, but fans have to stay with them forever? Seems like an unfair deal to me, I admire the devotion of those super fans and wish I am jealous of the idols who get all that loyal attention I'm out. ( I really only need one superfan, anyway! MJ!)
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Maybe it's because I recently went to a Japanese idol concert in West Hollywood at The Troubadour (a small room with a small stage with bar service trying to get as many people as they could to buy alcohol), an artist by the name of "Sky High," a stage name derived from his last name which roughly translated is "sky high." It was what could be expected, there was an opening act by another band that was equally as contrived and aroused my suspicions of lip-syncing, although I'm not an expert in that department by any means. Then when "Sky High came out with strobe lights shooting out, his female fans screamed and welcomed him with shrill shouts of ecstasy, like I imagine how Justin Bieber or Gavin DeGraw or any other famous male singer is introduced, except instead of thousands of fans at the Staples Center or Greek Theatre it was in front of a small circle of 20 diehards in West Hollywood (kind of sad really, but probably sadder that I paid to get into this show). He did a rap, had his backup dancers dance with him, played the piano, spoke to the audience in broken English during the breaks to catch his breath (he was dripping sweat towards the end from moving so much which I can empathize with but I imagine might DEMYSTIFY him for some of his female fans) and played an encore. Not bad really for a $32 show, but what I don't get is the attraction to become mega fans of this kind of show. I arrived an hour before the show time due to misunderstanding the start time (doors open means there's like an hour before they even begin, and that's just the opening act) where VIP guests were already waiting to get in to shake hands, take photos, and just be with SKY HI. They were so worried about getting to do this that they were rude to me in line for allegedly cutting them one space in line. Really? Aren't these idols all very similar? There wasn't anything particular special about SKY HI, maybe something about the lyrics that went too fast in Japanese for me to understand? (I can't even follow the lyrics for English songs most times)? He's really attractive? I feel like everything about Mr. SKY HI could be replaced by someone else pretty easily, from his very Asian hairstyle, his all-black outfit, his choreographed dance moves. Isn't there just another idol right around the corner? I guess we can all be replaced, sadly, who am I to say?
There's a very "otaku" culture in Japan and the same idea in other Asian cultures of being obsessive about certain things, and it can be very good for loyalty and devotion but dangerous in rejecting everything else and being so emotionally invested. That's why people get so upset about SMAP (Japanese equivalent of the Beatles) breaking up or some AKB48 (Akihabara 48, a Japanese girl idol group) member leaving. Really? What do these idols do for you, the fan? Sure they're saying, "I love you, LA!" but I'm sure they're saying "I love you New York, I love you Tokyo!" too, why the undying loyalty for mere entertainment? It's the same thing I guess with avid sports fans who live and die by their favorite sports team, they go to every game and feel like they're part of the team, even if the team loses all the time and doesn't care about its fans. At some point, don't you need some sort of reciprocation for all the love and energy you put into it? Music groups move on and break up all the time (sports teams lose and suck for years and years at a time or never win the championship) without blinking an eye, but fans have to stay with them forever? Seems like an unfair deal to me, I admire the devotion of those super fans and wish I am jealous of the idols who get all that loyal attention I'm out. ( I really only need one superfan, anyway! MJ!)
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Genius ( 지니어스)
Is there a scientific definition for who qualifies as a genius? Apparently there is a designated IQ score for someone to be a genius, but there could be so many different variations of who qualifies as a genius. For instance, I think I am a dodgeball "genius" due to my vast knowledge of the sport and the way the game works and have constantly studied strategies and techniques. Others may say genius is being able to adapt to different situations and be able to react accordingly in any situation appropriately, or a genius can be someone who has a broad array of knowledge in a wide array of disciplines.
Recently I became addicted to a Korean show called "The Genius," what I like to describe as a cross between a Korean game show and survivor. 13 contestants try to win games every week that challenge one's social abilities as well as thinking abilities, putting contestants through new games each week that require unique ways to solve the puzzle. The games are not that "hard," per se, and the host gives a great detailed explanation of the rules, it's just applying it is hard given so many different variables. I love it. It's a lot like party games I used to relish in college like "Mafia" or "Catchphrase," mind-bending activities that I got as much of a high from as others who chose to use recreational drugs like alcohol or marijuana. It's really sad, in my opinion, that the golden college years is wasted by so many (in the U.S. at least) on drinking, fraternities, drunken parties, and other debaucherous behavior that doesn't use up much brain cells. Indeed, 18, the time when young people are at the absolute apex of their mental abilities and the absolute apex of their free time/ lack of responsibilities and work obligations and ability to make their own decisions, is spent pursuing the party life. Sure there's studying for school, but then what better way to use your non-studying time to engage in intellectually challenging activities that are also really fun?
Sorry for the nerdy rant. Do check out "The Genius," though, there are 4 full seasons of the show, unfortunately all in Korean (there are subtitles though!) but a nice peek into Korean culture and different social interactions and balances, such as the Yutnori game that is apparently ubiquitous in Korea, or the amount of respect "hobae" (disciple) have for their senior (songbae), or in Japanese, senpai. It's just a really smart show for smart people. like humans on a chessboard or watching a really skillful game of "Mafia" being played. Or just go watch the new Marvel comics movie (the most recent one Thor:Ragnorak is apparently very good and let your mind go to waste. I feel like one of my passion projects if I ever make gobs of money (like $10 million +) would be to create an American version of The Genius (either that or The Mole), that's 2nd only to my No. 1 passion project of creating my own dodgeball association. All I need now is to get those millions of dollars first!
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Recently I became addicted to a Korean show called "The Genius," what I like to describe as a cross between a Korean game show and survivor. 13 contestants try to win games every week that challenge one's social abilities as well as thinking abilities, putting contestants through new games each week that require unique ways to solve the puzzle. The games are not that "hard," per se, and the host gives a great detailed explanation of the rules, it's just applying it is hard given so many different variables. I love it. It's a lot like party games I used to relish in college like "Mafia" or "Catchphrase," mind-bending activities that I got as much of a high from as others who chose to use recreational drugs like alcohol or marijuana. It's really sad, in my opinion, that the golden college years is wasted by so many (in the U.S. at least) on drinking, fraternities, drunken parties, and other debaucherous behavior that doesn't use up much brain cells. Indeed, 18, the time when young people are at the absolute apex of their mental abilities and the absolute apex of their free time/ lack of responsibilities and work obligations and ability to make their own decisions, is spent pursuing the party life. Sure there's studying for school, but then what better way to use your non-studying time to engage in intellectually challenging activities that are also really fun?
Sorry for the nerdy rant. Do check out "The Genius," though, there are 4 full seasons of the show, unfortunately all in Korean (there are subtitles though!) but a nice peek into Korean culture and different social interactions and balances, such as the Yutnori game that is apparently ubiquitous in Korea, or the amount of respect "hobae" (disciple) have for their senior (songbae), or in Japanese, senpai. It's just a really smart show for smart people. like humans on a chessboard or watching a really skillful game of "Mafia" being played. Or just go watch the new Marvel comics movie (the most recent one Thor:Ragnorak is apparently very good and let your mind go to waste. I feel like one of my passion projects if I ever make gobs of money (like $10 million +) would be to create an American version of The Genius (either that or The Mole), that's 2nd only to my No. 1 passion project of creating my own dodgeball association. All I need now is to get those millions of dollars first!
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Tuesday, November 7, 2017
お菓子 = Candy
It's that time of year again: A string of holidays that promote the consumption of candy, chocolate, and other sweets. The offending holidays' names? Halloween (all about candy), Thanksgiving (you need some dessert and apple pie to balance out all the turkey and gravy, right?), Christmas (Candy canes and silver lanes aglow and all that), then a sneaky one because it's the next calendar year but still in that winter season: Valentine's Day in February, and in Japan there's even a BACKWARDS Valentine's Day called White Day where there's even more chocolate consumed......Really a damning time for our already inflated waistlines, especially with all the processed sugars in candy, the winter hibernation and sitting around and cold weather really doesn't help any of that.
Continuing the rant (It's not over!), candy is the one food that actually gives no nutritional value! All it does is give people a sugar high and doesn't fill them up (actually does the opposite by giving a stomache). Count running out after sugar too, because sugar that tricky fellow gives a quick boost of energy for like the first minute of the run, you feel on top of the world, and then it rips the high from under you and there's a major crash, no energy.
My personal nutritionist (she also happens to be my wife) tells me that we should eat a lot of foods that have different colors because they all have different nutrients to them.....especially green, red, purple, orange, etc.......that's awesome for a salad. But chocolate.......chocolates have all the wrong colors, the thick coating of brown, the milk chocolate white indicating dairy, cheese, and richness.....and the golden yellow of peanut butter, very ominous colors for a healthy lifestyle. Also black? really dark chocolate = really bad for teeth.
With all those caveats to discourage kids from eating candy and getting hooked on candy, here are my top candies to have (if you must, use with extreme discretion):
1.) Snickers: Hungry? Why wait. The heyday of the chocolate/sweets industry left us with so many great commercials, and their advertising campaign still produces great ones like "You're not yourself when you're hungry. Have a snickers." Couple that with the rich creamy milk chocolate and peanut butter taste, it's what most people think about when they think of a chocolate bar.
2.) Kit Kat: Gimme a break, gimme a break. Break me off a piece of that.....(even featured in an episode of The Office, Andy trying to sing that song, it was so mainstream). Very crispy, has its name ingrained on each piece for more subliminal enforcement, wafer-style makes me want it just thinking about it. Also comes in Green Tea now, and Japanese people give them out for people taking exams as encouragement because it sounds like "Must win" in Japanese.
3.) M&M's: still people dressing up in the colorful costumes and used to own a M&M shaped chair. Like the variety of peanut butter, cinnamon, and the ability to stop after consuming just a few pieces of regret.
Further down: Reese's gets mushed too much
Underrated: Almond Joy. Almond + chocolate + coconut = enough of a taste differentiation from other chocolates to feel really special (ever notice how some chocolates just mix together and it all starts tasting the same after a while?)
Only consume if you're in a bind and there's literally no under candy around: Hershey's. Bland, no innovation, maybe they shouldn't stay "unchanged since 1899" anymore and actually like, you know, evolve and improve .
Snickers's inferior cousins: 3 Musketeers, Milky Way.
Twizzler's or Red Vine: really, are these even candies?
Seriously though, I can't believe my parents let me consume all this stuff when I was a kid and ruin my teeth/my diet/ become chubby! They're scientists too, they should know about addiction! I had to become an adult to detox on all these sugars! Shame! Only give ONE piece of candy as a reward for eating a WHOLE salad or doing a FULL workout. Nothing tastes good anymore after eating candy, and the artificial of it all comes out. Eat sweet fruits like grapes or oranges as a replacement, you'll thank me later, kids of the world.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Continuing the rant (It's not over!), candy is the one food that actually gives no nutritional value! All it does is give people a sugar high and doesn't fill them up (actually does the opposite by giving a stomache). Count running out after sugar too, because sugar that tricky fellow gives a quick boost of energy for like the first minute of the run, you feel on top of the world, and then it rips the high from under you and there's a major crash, no energy.
My personal nutritionist (she also happens to be my wife) tells me that we should eat a lot of foods that have different colors because they all have different nutrients to them.....especially green, red, purple, orange, etc.......that's awesome for a salad. But chocolate.......chocolates have all the wrong colors, the thick coating of brown, the milk chocolate white indicating dairy, cheese, and richness.....and the golden yellow of peanut butter, very ominous colors for a healthy lifestyle. Also black? really dark chocolate = really bad for teeth.
With all those caveats to discourage kids from eating candy and getting hooked on candy, here are my top candies to have (if you must, use with extreme discretion):
1.) Snickers: Hungry? Why wait. The heyday of the chocolate/sweets industry left us with so many great commercials, and their advertising campaign still produces great ones like "You're not yourself when you're hungry. Have a snickers." Couple that with the rich creamy milk chocolate and peanut butter taste, it's what most people think about when they think of a chocolate bar.
2.) Kit Kat: Gimme a break, gimme a break. Break me off a piece of that.....(even featured in an episode of The Office, Andy trying to sing that song, it was so mainstream). Very crispy, has its name ingrained on each piece for more subliminal enforcement, wafer-style makes me want it just thinking about it. Also comes in Green Tea now, and Japanese people give them out for people taking exams as encouragement because it sounds like "Must win" in Japanese.
3.) M&M's: still people dressing up in the colorful costumes and used to own a M&M shaped chair. Like the variety of peanut butter, cinnamon, and the ability to stop after consuming just a few pieces of regret.
Further down: Reese's gets mushed too much
Underrated: Almond Joy. Almond + chocolate + coconut = enough of a taste differentiation from other chocolates to feel really special (ever notice how some chocolates just mix together and it all starts tasting the same after a while?)
Only consume if you're in a bind and there's literally no under candy around: Hershey's. Bland, no innovation, maybe they shouldn't stay "unchanged since 1899" anymore and actually like, you know, evolve and improve .
Snickers's inferior cousins: 3 Musketeers, Milky Way.
Twizzler's or Red Vine: really, are these even candies?
Seriously though, I can't believe my parents let me consume all this stuff when I was a kid and ruin my teeth/my diet/ become chubby! They're scientists too, they should know about addiction! I had to become an adult to detox on all these sugars! Shame! Only give ONE piece of candy as a reward for eating a WHOLE salad or doing a FULL workout. Nothing tastes good anymore after eating candy, and the artificial of it all comes out. Eat sweet fruits like grapes or oranges as a replacement, you'll thank me later, kids of the world.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Monday, November 6, 2017
中華街 (Chinatown)
Whenever I go to a new city, I'm interested in ballparks, tallest buildings, landmark structures, statues, and.....where its Chinatown is located. My first residence in America was near Chicago's Chinatown, after all. Like major airports and sports teams, a city is not complete without its Chinatown.
I've lived in Los Angeles and surrounding areas for several years now, and there are some atypical things about this city: the lack of tall buildings in downtown, the lack of public transportation (one of the only cities I've ever been to without a direct train ride form the main airport (LAX) to downtown, or anywhere for that matter), the proximity to the beach and large expanse of beach land, the forced relocation of many families from Chavez Ravine to build a baseball stadium (Dodger Stadium), etc., etc. This past Friday night, MJ and I visited one of the more puzzling aspects of the city, to me: the relatively abandoned Chinatown.
First of all, there are 2 Chinatowns in Los Angeles, "old Chinatown" near L.A. downtown and then "new Chinatown" in the San Gabriel Valley areas of Monterrey Park, Alhambra, etc. As far as I can remember, my family has only ever gone to the "new Chinatown," and left the "old Chinatown" behind. But as MJ and I walked down the mostly-abandoned streets of Broadway and Main making up the main areas of old Chinatown (you can even find street parking, which is a sure sign an area is not busy!) we couldn't help but wonder why the place wasn't more bustling with activity. It's got a lot going for it:
1.) location near downtown L.A. and Dodger Stadium: I pass Chinatown every time I run from my office in downtown L.A. to Elysian Park and Dodger Stadium. It's a short bus ride away from downtown and even has a gold line subway stop now connecting to L.A. Union Station. It's more accessible than the airport and much closer to the financial center! Don't have to wait in traffic!
2.) Recognizable film presence! Rush Hour starring Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker was filmed at the Foo Chow Restaurant and it's displayed prominently on its walls attracting patrons to come in, as well as parts of Lala Land.
3.) New restaurants springing up! MJ was very interested in Howlin' Rays, a fried chicken joint imitating the famous Nashville hot chicken places. Videos showed lines formed for lunch, but the restaurant was closed by 4PM on a Friday! Incredible, indicating that there's demand for stuff, just not at dinner, when people go to more hip areas of Los Angeles. The legendary french dip sandwich place called Philippe's is also there. The place is just brimming with history and tradition!
4.) New residential developments cropping up, although local residents (mostly Chinese and Hispanic) are not happy because the higher-end shops and residents they're attracting are not the type that fit the local tradition.
5.) Food's pretty good and cheap! People love Chinese food! Store owners seemed to be Chinese and making authentic Chinese food (dim sum!) and prices were certainly low enough to get my attention as opposed to blowing $60 plus on the newest trendy joint in Hollywood/Santa Monica.
L.A. supposedly is an upcoming and city, and there are new areas that become hip and trendy, so there's definitely hope for "old Chinatown" to have a makeover, especially the convenient real estate where it sits. I just wish that on a Friday night after a long week for Los Angeles residents where Halloween happened and the Dodgers lost an epic 7-game World Series and have many reasons to disperse of some pent-up energy, that MJ and I would not be the only ones sitting in a decent Chinese restaurant (the B rating just shows how authentic and hole-in-a-wall it is!) and disappointed to find that the hot chicken place we heard so much about was closed. Free Chinatown! Make old Chinatown great again!
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
I've lived in Los Angeles and surrounding areas for several years now, and there are some atypical things about this city: the lack of tall buildings in downtown, the lack of public transportation (one of the only cities I've ever been to without a direct train ride form the main airport (LAX) to downtown, or anywhere for that matter), the proximity to the beach and large expanse of beach land, the forced relocation of many families from Chavez Ravine to build a baseball stadium (Dodger Stadium), etc., etc. This past Friday night, MJ and I visited one of the more puzzling aspects of the city, to me: the relatively abandoned Chinatown.
First of all, there are 2 Chinatowns in Los Angeles, "old Chinatown" near L.A. downtown and then "new Chinatown" in the San Gabriel Valley areas of Monterrey Park, Alhambra, etc. As far as I can remember, my family has only ever gone to the "new Chinatown," and left the "old Chinatown" behind. But as MJ and I walked down the mostly-abandoned streets of Broadway and Main making up the main areas of old Chinatown (you can even find street parking, which is a sure sign an area is not busy!) we couldn't help but wonder why the place wasn't more bustling with activity. It's got a lot going for it:
1.) location near downtown L.A. and Dodger Stadium: I pass Chinatown every time I run from my office in downtown L.A. to Elysian Park and Dodger Stadium. It's a short bus ride away from downtown and even has a gold line subway stop now connecting to L.A. Union Station. It's more accessible than the airport and much closer to the financial center! Don't have to wait in traffic!
2.) Recognizable film presence! Rush Hour starring Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker was filmed at the Foo Chow Restaurant and it's displayed prominently on its walls attracting patrons to come in, as well as parts of Lala Land.
3.) New restaurants springing up! MJ was very interested in Howlin' Rays, a fried chicken joint imitating the famous Nashville hot chicken places. Videos showed lines formed for lunch, but the restaurant was closed by 4PM on a Friday! Incredible, indicating that there's demand for stuff, just not at dinner, when people go to more hip areas of Los Angeles. The legendary french dip sandwich place called Philippe's is also there. The place is just brimming with history and tradition!
4.) New residential developments cropping up, although local residents (mostly Chinese and Hispanic) are not happy because the higher-end shops and residents they're attracting are not the type that fit the local tradition.
5.) Food's pretty good and cheap! People love Chinese food! Store owners seemed to be Chinese and making authentic Chinese food (dim sum!) and prices were certainly low enough to get my attention as opposed to blowing $60 plus on the newest trendy joint in Hollywood/Santa Monica.
L.A. supposedly is an upcoming and city, and there are new areas that become hip and trendy, so there's definitely hope for "old Chinatown" to have a makeover, especially the convenient real estate where it sits. I just wish that on a Friday night after a long week for Los Angeles residents where Halloween happened and the Dodgers lost an epic 7-game World Series and have many reasons to disperse of some pent-up energy, that MJ and I would not be the only ones sitting in a decent Chinese restaurant (the B rating just shows how authentic and hole-in-a-wall it is!) and disappointed to find that the hot chicken place we heard so much about was closed. Free Chinatown! Make old Chinatown great again!
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Saturday, November 4, 2017
口出し and わりこみ - Interrupting someone
Speaking to other kids was a chore as a kid. No rules to social etiquette, so lots of speaking whenever one wanted (irresponsibly), butting in to someone else's sentence without a second thought. Upon becoming an adult one learns a lot about how to behave, unwritten rules about proper etiquette in various types of situations, but people still butt in and break the rules . It's often not listed in a handbook or cheat sheet anywhere (although, I've always advocated for a "How to be an Adult" guide for those who don't get it, but it's a subtle art to master everything. One of the most important indicators of someone "getting it" is when to jump into a conversation, avoiding interrupting someone.
It depends on the culture, but it's important to let someone finish their sentence or train of thought. This is often indicated by the sentence losing steam or coming to an end, at which point there is a slight pause and an opportunity is presented to give one's own thoughts and reply to what the speaker had just said. This is often an important time also to let anyone else who's listening get a chance to speak, so as not to monopolize the conversation. It's called being courteous and being considerate of others. Sometimes, even around my "friend circle" and very educated adults, the etiquette of not "cutting in" gets lost as people just jump in with their own ideas without letting someone finish their own thought.
1.) Often, Japanese people complete their conversation partner's sentence for them. This is actually considered polite if it's just to confirm what they were saying, not just jumping off into a new topic and totally dismissing what the original speaker said.
2.) Someone who always butts in can be diagnosed as "not being able to read the air," or just not gauging the atmosphere, unable to read the room. "Reading the room" is one of the most important cliches in social circles, knowing who is who and who has what agenda, who is friends and allied with whom, those are super important.
3.) If you do happen to interrupt someone who wasn't done talking, apologize and ask him/her were finished .Let him or her finish.
4.) One of the most frustrating things when talking in a group is having a great follow-up or joke right after original speaker is done speaker, but someone else jumps in first and takes the topic in a different direction, and the joke/thought doesn't make any sense anymore.
5.) What happens if 2 more more speakers start speaking at the same time? BOTH should stop! Then make eye contact and defer based on various factors like age, sex (ladies first!), and then maybe urgency to make the point, how much each potential speaker has been given a chance to speak earlier, etc. Whatever the case, don't just keep talking thinking the others will stop by their own accord! Some inconsiderate people will just keep talking in a daring game of "chicken" to see if the other person will just stop if they're persistent enough. HAVE COMMON COURTESY!
6.) If you originally interrupted somebody when starting your thought but made the statement anyway, at the end of your statement direct it to the interrupted party by going "sorry what did you want to say?" etc. By this time they might have lost all interest to speak and clammed up but it's important to give them a chance to get back into the conversation that they just got elbowed out of.
7.) It's different when engaging in a domestic quibble/fight/verbal battle/ debate. In those ways words are used as a weapon in a mounting conflict, so I understand sometimes emotions and competiton getting in the way of things and things being blurted out. But in fights (MJ and I unfortunately do this and know all too well!) it might more important than usual to listen to what the other person says first before blurting one's own thoughts.
"Warikomu" in japanese can mean either cutting into a conversation OR the traditional sense of cutting in line, and line-cutting is definitely something society needs some rules for. Can you cut in line if your partner/friend was saving a spot for you? If it's ok for 1 person, what about 6 or 7 people coming into the line with just 1 person holding a spot? Is that OK? Are lines even an effective way to order people anymore? (maybe create a market where people who pay more get to go to front of line?) There's definitely been times I thought I was in line, then someone just comes in from somewhere else and doesn't see the imaginary construct I created and just goes up to the front, leaving the line in his or dust. I'm super conscious now of it and make sure I ask if anyone is in line BEFORE I step to the front of the register nowadays to make sure I'm not hypocritically committing my own pet peeve.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
It depends on the culture, but it's important to let someone finish their sentence or train of thought. This is often indicated by the sentence losing steam or coming to an end, at which point there is a slight pause and an opportunity is presented to give one's own thoughts and reply to what the speaker had just said. This is often an important time also to let anyone else who's listening get a chance to speak, so as not to monopolize the conversation. It's called being courteous and being considerate of others. Sometimes, even around my "friend circle" and very educated adults, the etiquette of not "cutting in" gets lost as people just jump in with their own ideas without letting someone finish their own thought.
1.) Often, Japanese people complete their conversation partner's sentence for them. This is actually considered polite if it's just to confirm what they were saying, not just jumping off into a new topic and totally dismissing what the original speaker said.
2.) Someone who always butts in can be diagnosed as "not being able to read the air," or just not gauging the atmosphere, unable to read the room. "Reading the room" is one of the most important cliches in social circles, knowing who is who and who has what agenda, who is friends and allied with whom, those are super important.
3.) If you do happen to interrupt someone who wasn't done talking, apologize and ask him/her were finished .Let him or her finish.
4.) One of the most frustrating things when talking in a group is having a great follow-up or joke right after original speaker is done speaker, but someone else jumps in first and takes the topic in a different direction, and the joke/thought doesn't make any sense anymore.
5.) What happens if 2 more more speakers start speaking at the same time? BOTH should stop! Then make eye contact and defer based on various factors like age, sex (ladies first!), and then maybe urgency to make the point, how much each potential speaker has been given a chance to speak earlier, etc. Whatever the case, don't just keep talking thinking the others will stop by their own accord! Some inconsiderate people will just keep talking in a daring game of "chicken" to see if the other person will just stop if they're persistent enough. HAVE COMMON COURTESY!
6.) If you originally interrupted somebody when starting your thought but made the statement anyway, at the end of your statement direct it to the interrupted party by going "sorry what did you want to say?" etc. By this time they might have lost all interest to speak and clammed up but it's important to give them a chance to get back into the conversation that they just got elbowed out of.
7.) It's different when engaging in a domestic quibble/fight/verbal battle/ debate. In those ways words are used as a weapon in a mounting conflict, so I understand sometimes emotions and competiton getting in the way of things and things being blurted out. But in fights (MJ and I unfortunately do this and know all too well!) it might more important than usual to listen to what the other person says first before blurting one's own thoughts.
"Warikomu" in japanese can mean either cutting into a conversation OR the traditional sense of cutting in line, and line-cutting is definitely something society needs some rules for. Can you cut in line if your partner/friend was saving a spot for you? If it's ok for 1 person, what about 6 or 7 people coming into the line with just 1 person holding a spot? Is that OK? Are lines even an effective way to order people anymore? (maybe create a market where people who pay more get to go to front of line?) There's definitely been times I thought I was in line, then someone just comes in from somewhere else and doesn't see the imaginary construct I created and just goes up to the front, leaving the line in his or dust. I'm super conscious now of it and make sure I ask if anyone is in line BEFORE I step to the front of the register nowadays to make sure I'm not hypocritically committing my own pet peeve.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Wednesday, November 1, 2017
청개구리 (The Green Frog)
Just learned more Korean today! (Was very inspired by the "Do you want to eat some ramyeon?" idiom from last night). Apparently, a green frog is a rebellious child who does the opposite of what his mother tells him (or her? not sure but I feel like it's more likely to be a son) to do. So the mom, anticipating the son to do the opposite of what she says, tells him to bury her near the river, thinking he'll do the opposite, but instead he actually for once in his pathetic life does what he's told and honors his mom's last wish, and the mom's body washes away when the river swells up. First of all, sad story, and a great lesson about not burying people in low sea levels, but I feel for the parents! Some kids are just born to never follow directions, and you never know when these "green frogs" will finally mature and turn into full adults and actually get it. It could be really early (teens), 20's, or never! It's different for everyone. Second of all, these are the kinds of stories parents deliberately tell their kids to affect behavior, and now having gone through that process I see how effective it is. It's like the story of Santa Clause to get kids to behave well, or Gods, or the story of the Boogeyman, or that there are sharks in the ocean that will eat them if they go too far out, or that if you swallow gum it'll take 7 years to pass through your system, etc., etc. As a lawyer it sounds like the kids should band together as a class action and sue their parents for fraud and deliberating misrepresentation, but as parents it's brilliant: kids will always be curious if parents tell them "NOT to do something," they'll inevitably want to do it. (Should have told the kids recently who threw rocks on a highway overpass and killed a driver with a rock- horrible story, every car driver and passenger's worst nightmare) You need something so scary but believable to scare the kids straight into not doing that activity, ever.
I often feel like the green frog in my relationship with MJ. She says don't get blood on the towels, I inevitably get blood on the towels. She says don't put fruit garbage in the wastebasket because they attract fruit flies (and instead put them in the freezer, an ingenious idea I never thought of), I inevitably leave some fruit in the wastebasket. Maybe one day she will say the opposite of what she wants to happen and that'll be the one time I finally heed her orders! Maybe she should make up a story about bad stuff that will happen (like if I don't pick up all my nails I'll turn into a green frog or something, and it'll effect change- incentives drive people's actions).
The green frog is just one in several animal imagery words Koreans use, like "all women are foxes, all mean are wolves." I love animal imagery when learning language, which is pretty universal in most languages: we learn faster things we can visualize, like equating women to the image of a fox, as opposed to all the different ways to say "agree" or "support" that have so many different variations and require the most brutal method of rote memorization. I feel like if corporate tax law or the California Code of Civil Procedure had animal metaphors and laws that were named after animals or related to animals, I (and many others) would remember a lot more of them. (OR if the punishment for felonies was something incredible like the offenders will turn into green frogs or something)
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
I often feel like the green frog in my relationship with MJ. She says don't get blood on the towels, I inevitably get blood on the towels. She says don't put fruit garbage in the wastebasket because they attract fruit flies (and instead put them in the freezer, an ingenious idea I never thought of), I inevitably leave some fruit in the wastebasket. Maybe one day she will say the opposite of what she wants to happen and that'll be the one time I finally heed her orders! Maybe she should make up a story about bad stuff that will happen (like if I don't pick up all my nails I'll turn into a green frog or something, and it'll effect change- incentives drive people's actions).
The green frog is just one in several animal imagery words Koreans use, like "all women are foxes, all mean are wolves." I love animal imagery when learning language, which is pretty universal in most languages: we learn faster things we can visualize, like equating women to the image of a fox, as opposed to all the different ways to say "agree" or "support" that have so many different variations and require the most brutal method of rote memorization. I feel like if corporate tax law or the California Code of Civil Procedure had animal metaphors and laws that were named after animals or related to animals, I (and many others) would remember a lot more of them. (OR if the punishment for felonies was something incredible like the offenders will turn into green frogs or something)
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
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