No, I am not doing a Big Year that bird-watchers know and
love (try to identify as many bird species as possible, as chronicled in the
movie “The Big Year” –not a bad movie to check out, btw) I’m merely
pontificating that 2014 is a big transition year for me. It’s a year that’s not very definite and has
lots of ways it can go. Almost every facet of my life (romantic, career,
residence, free time, fantasy teams, I’ll cover each separately) is affected
and is in flux in what will probably be the most dynamic year of my life to
date. In the sense that I’m not sure where it will go but there’s a lot of
potential.
The End of 2013 will always be remembered as the 3 months I
spent A LOT of time studying Japanese, and I mean a LOT- to the point of being
an “inja” 隠者(hermit in Japanese) from October to December,
with a week in China thrown in there and 3 weekends out of 4 in Vegas in December
(I know, weird month)
1.)
Romantic
I’ve always thought that this would be the age- 26, turning
27 where I would start to settle down. (Actually when I was in a Spelling Bee
craze I wanted to have a kid ASAP to train that kid into a spelling bee champ-
but anyway) I don’t know if others share the same goal but 30 has always been
my deadline to get married. I think my parents have that goal as well, but more
importantly it’s a goal for me. It’s a big life timeline, as much as age and
things are all relative and whatnot, on a personal level it’s still a very big
number for me, like 3000 hits in baseball or 500 HRs or whatnot, as much as
athletes say they don’t focus on personal stats, there is no doubt they think
about it. I think about it. In 3 years I will be very close to turning 30, and
what will I be doing then? Who will I be with? What will I be doing? The next 3
years are SO SO crucial in determining that. (I almost wish I hadn’t wasted 3
years in law school, lol). Mottainai! (What a waste!)
2.)
Career
So I’m not sure what I had in mind
when I graduated from high school or even started college as a finance major
for what I’d be doing at this point, but it almost certainly wasn’t to be a
contract attorney. 2013 was my most lucrative year but also probably the one
where I established what my career will be- that is, probably not in the
traditional law firm setting. Being able to speak/understand 3 languages now,
Chinese, English and (limited but growing all the time) Japanese gives me some
flexibility as to what I do for work. It’s both a blessing and a curse in that
I have much more control over my schedule and how much I work but also I’m at
the mercy of the market and bereft of the guarantees of lifetime employment or
career benefits (although my argument would be that even in Japan lifetime
employment is becoming less pervasive, a global trend where people can provide
services individually a lot easier and independent contractors are more common)
3.)
Residence:
Closely related to that is of course where
I will live. Living in Los Angeles has been a blast and I’ve met a lot of new
people, but it’s always been a fantasy of mine to live in Chicago for a summer
in downtown. I’ve also had fantasies of living in various cities of the world,
like Tokyo or Beijing or Hong Kong for a short period. Seattle for some reason
sticks out as a desirable location. Last year when I lived in Philadelphia for
2 months it was enjoyable and definitely sticks out in my memory; I was totally
on my own and exposed to new things, like taking trains everywhere and East
Coast attitude. I yearn for that again, but I wouldn’t want to do it at the
expense of losing work opportunities/losing friends. It’s a tough dilemma, and
it has to be balanced with what kind of lease I sign for apartments. I am by
definition a short-term lease guy, but most complexes naturally want as long of
a commitment as possible. Ultimately, though, I wonder if I will ever get a
chance to live in different areas of the world once I turn 30, especially if I
satisfy No. 1 and start a family….then it’s not just me anymore. Sigh. Life and
decisions.
4.)
Free time activities:
Dodgeball, violin, running (I’ve had about
4 years of great running around the L.A. area)
5.)
Fantasy Sports
Even in 2013 I wrote about how I found
myself having less time for fantasy sports, especially in the baseball season.
During late 2013 it was even more so: I wasn’t on rotoworld.com that often
anymore, the fantasy football page was not the first page I checked every
morning any more, I would go whole days without thinking about which players I
would check. Is the process of “becoming an adult” starting? Or is it just a
lull? Will I ever be back to the 2010-levels of fantasy awareness and do I want
to be? A huge swing year that will probably be dictated by how well I do
especially in my USC Law fantasy baseball league- If I win the championship, I
might just retire (one of the few remaining fantasy goals I’ve yet to achieve).
6.)
Finally, through my experience with Match.com
(horror/survival stories to come in subsequent post) and dating in general I’ve
come to realize how important my family is to me… they are a constant in my
life that I can cling and hold on to, sometimes a little too much. I’ve become
a little too reluctant on my parents to support me since I’ve lived in Los
Angeles, and I wonder if that’s holding me back from pursuing my romantic
ideals. It’s not a causation, but there’s definitely a correlation. I
understand that I get great joy from my parents and I’m welcome and my parents
actually look forward to me coming home, but in the back of mind I know that at
some point the best thing for me is to be set free (cue Disney revelation
music).
That is what my 2014 will probably turn
around: Learning to set myself free.
I hope you’ve enjoyed the annual tradition of
Robert Yan babbling introspectively about his own life: back to actionable
fantasy advice/life observations/ readable material next post. Happy 2014!
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
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