The Smartest Guy in the Industry

Recently I've come to a revelation: I'm not that smart.

As arrogant as this seems in that it presupposes that I AM smart and also indicates that I once thought I WAS pretty smart, I think it's a very humble and honest assessment of my place in the world.

In grade school up until high school, I felt smart. Things came easily, I did my homework quickly, I got good grades, got awards for being smart. Yay for me. Everybody congratulated me, I tooted my own horn, felt great. BAM....get to college, and find out everyone at college did pretty well in high school too...so it's the cream of the crop. It's harder to get an A, people in discussions think of things that I never thought of, others' essays are more brilliantly written, things don't come so easily to me anymore, I often find myself confused. Go to law school, find out there's even SMARTER people here, it's the cream of the cream of the crop from college, and now I'm definitely not at the elite status. People do better than me in school, people think more clearly,


this is definitely a problem in a knowledge industry. Especially in a field like law (kind of like philosophy, mathematics, etc.), it's an industry primarily based on knowlege, and the smartest guys in the industry are the ones people want to hire, people look to. Not being smart in this industry is definitely a problem.

But it's not a mortal failing. I can still go back to my main strengths: determination, work ethic, and a new one I'm finding quite suitable for myself: likability. As much as I don't get something, or have a hard time understanding a concept, I make up for it by reading it over and over again, owning it. If all else fails, I admit defeat, and try to wiggle out through some self-deprecating humor.

It's definitely a limitation I'm a little worried about, but I have to keep it in perspective: I'm a law school graduate from a top law school who will hopefully (gulp, cross fingers) be licensed to practice law in California very soon. I don't have to be the smartest guy in the industry; I'm already pretty smart. (Keep telling myself that, keep telling myself that)


Now a little note about the Penn St. scandal that's been all over the news: If you haven't been following, Penn St. assistant coach Jerry Sandusky allegedly took showers with several boys at Penn State facilitiates over the span of more than a decade but was never stopped by Penn State officials, and head coach Joe Paterno knew about the behavior but only reported to the higher authorities.

Here's my feeling: I love kids. I've always stated that. I love their enthusiasm, their energy for life; it can be one of the best times in a person's life. But it can also be the worst, because you can be taken advantage of by adults who abuse their position of power. This is the worst kind of abuse of power oo: Using the power to exploit other people who are powerless into doing what you want for you. We as adults have so much power to make a positive change in a child's life, and that responsibility is an ultimate duty that we cannot breach. You can breach your duty to clean up after yourself, you can breach your duty to feed your pets, you can even breach your duty to be a good spouse (although, not recommended), but you CANNOT breach your duty to a child. That duty is inherent the day you become an adult and applies to everyone, even those who do not actively victimize children but know that it is going on. You have a duty to each and every child that is living, especially when you know they are being victimized by someone they cannot combat. So shame on you, Joe Paterno, shame on you, Penn St. administration and everyone who took a blind eye. May your failings be a lesson and a reminder to us all of what children mean to us.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

NFL Rewind

Not a salesperson for the National Football League, but nfl.com has this nice feature called NFL Rewind that lets you go back and watch all the games for the whole season for a pretty-neat deal of $40.00 for the whole season. Get a couple of your friends to chip in, gather around, each game only lasts about an hour for the "full version," 30 minutes for the condensed. Nothing like the 3-hour marathons you sludge through on Sundays. Only problem with it? You don't get the games until the day AFTER the games are played, when all the excitement is gone and your co-workers at the water cooler have already talked about it. I still love it. Great for tracking your fantasy players' progress.

Now imagine if you had this feature for life....called Life Rewind. O man, how useful would that be. Top 5 things I could use it for:

1.) Rewind and watch myself in key moments of my life, like job interviews, dates, sports games, etc......watch myself and evaluate my own performance.

2.) Go back and relive cool moments in your life, or vacations.....see what you missed. It's like watching a movie a second time.... you always find something new. That would be what Life Rewind would be all about. I'm a guy who dwells on things (for example, I look back on my high school chess games all the time and think what I could have done differently), so Rewind would allow me to go back and relive.

3.) Fast forward through the boring stuff. The long rides in traffic, boredom, hearing your parents lecture you about brushing your teeth the right way, blah, blah, blah......"

4.) Settle your doubts. If you're anything like me and are awaiting the California bar results, it's the sense of not knowing that's driving you crazy. What if you missed this issue on the test? What did I answer for that specific question? Life Rewind would let you go back and know what you did, when you did it.....at least you would know.


Anyway, now that I think about it, probably not as cool, and seems like a terrible waste of time.....gotta live in the now, plan for the future....the past is behind us.

Which is why I'm looking ahead to the rest of the fantasy football season.

Fred Jackson can't continue to be the #1 running back in all of fantasy, can he? I'd let someone else take a chance. However, remind yourself that football more than any other season is very different year to year.....you'll never have a nobody in fantasy baseball finish in the top 5 in all of fantasy, but you might get TWO in fantasy football (Peyton Hillis, Mike Vick last year), so you never know.

I'd avoid trading heavy for Running backs. The way RB's take abuse and get injured this year, I'd take a chance on any other position. Hate to try to predict injuries, but just look at Jamaal Charles, Felix Jones, Darren McFadden, and Peyton Hillis and you know I'm right. Backup RB's can also fill in and do the job right away....WR's and TE's usually cannot. Certainly not QB's......Donald Brown can do just as good a job as Joseph Addai, Chris Ivory for Mark Ingram, Jackie Battle for Jamaal Charles, to name a few. It takes a while for receivers to build a repertoire with QB's even if they step into a featured role... the QB can just go elsewhere.

Buy Ben Roethlisberger. The casual fan might not know it and think the Steelers are a ground-and-pound football team with lots of running, but that's dead run. Big Ben operates a spread offense-like attack and hands it off only as a breather and to keep the defense honest. Also with that, take Steeler WR/TE's.

I TOLD you about Mike Vick. For the umpteenth time since Vick broke into the league, the Bears handled him and exposed how you beat him on Monday Night Football. I'd stay away from his WR's neither, but not Shady McCoy. He's a beast.

More from my NFL Rewind observations: Aaron Rodgers will throw at least 3 touchdown passes every play, and they have like 1 rushing TD all season and no 100-yard rushing days. It's strictly passing all the way.

The Seahawks are bad. But you didn't need me to tell you that.

Jake Ballard and Victor Cruz are like the best receiving targets for Eli Manning, and Manning throws a lot. Get them.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

New York City Weekend

Just got off a grueling 3-day weekend spent in NYC. Took one-stop connections there AND back (so 4 planes all told), lotsa subways, slept on wooden floors, and verbally assaulted by enraged taxi drivers. But I'm alive.

Observations about NYC:

1. There's a noticeable difference between "Uptown NYC" and "Downtown NYC." East Village, Manhattan, Downtown is very nice, you got Wall Street, Central Park, Fifth Avenue, nice shops, great restaurants, great sights. But once you go up the subway to like the Bronx, it gets shady.... it looks more run-down, not-so squeaky clean anymore. It's perceptible just by riding the "4" "5" or "6" subways. Big difference just by the type and demeanor people getting on and off at different stops. Really highlights the "have and have-not" culture of the U.S., especially in the preeminent city in America, the Big Apple.

2. LaGuardia's a lot closer to everything than JFK, and riding into LaGuardia at 6:00PM evening gets you a GREAT view of the whole city. Holy moly, was I glad I stuck w/ a left-side aisle seat on the way there. Citi Field, Hudson Bay, Downtown Manhattan, Statue of Liberty, etc., etc. I highly recommend it.

3. NYC Marathon is a pretty big deal. Happened to be there this weekend, and visited in Central Park. Pretty cool; goal is to one day run in one of these, whether it be LA, Chicago, Boston, or NY.

4. Highland Park is apparently the big, bad, new thing in NYC, and it really matches the hype. Pretty much a big part on top of a bunch of buildings, it gets you a pretty clear view of a lot of NYC. Liked it.

5. Found it ironic that the Occupy Wall Street protestors are within shouting range of the 9/11 World Trade Center Memorial. The two most defining events of the last decade, represented within a 2-block radius, with contrasting messages highlighted by loss and tragedy. There's got to be a poem in there somewhere, it seems intensely ironic.

6. Lotsa, lotsa couples walking around NYC. It's stunning how many faces you see just walking around; whereas LA is defined by people driving around in their cars behind a shield made of protective steel (a.k.a. your car), in NYC people are always out, there's nowhere to hide.

7. Rudeness. Yea, East Coasters are rude. I mean, it's not just me, my New York friends were telling me about this before I even got there. Cab drivers give you a hard time if you don't tip them enough (first-hand experience), people walking behind you get peeved if you don't jaywalk in an obvious situation, drivers honk at the slightest perceived slight, etc., etc. If you think LA didn't have patience for people, o jeez wait for NY. Although, it makes you wonder, doesn't it? Weren't we all, no matter where we grew up, taught the same basic lessons of manners and sympathy for each other? Empathy/put yourself in others' shoes? I feel like somewhere along the way in the busy, make money-or-leave atmosphere of New York, those basic tenets of life fade way to capitalism and individualism. The city is that powerful.

8. O ya, everything in New York costs A LOT. Biggest motivator for me yet to make money in this world: New York will take your money and take a LOT of it. $6 for a hot dog (and not even at a baseball stadium). $15 for a bowl of Ramen. $2.25 in a subway to go 3 blocks. In no other city, I feel, are you defined so much by the way you dress/how much you make/your overall success. The whole city seems to demand that you be successful, or leave.

9. Yankee Stadium- made possibly my one and only trip. Pretty cool.

10. Times Square- tourist trap. Sure you got the bright lights and all, but you also got so many people you can hardly breathe. Avoid. (Sell, sell, sell)


All in all, my research of NYC this weekend and over the years ( remind me to relate the story of the 2003 NYC Blackout that I lived through) suggest that I should NOT live in New York. Not now; not ever: Don't try to worm your way into the Big Apple.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan


Robert Yan

Yea, It's the Freakin' Weekend

Title inspired by a recent song (not sure of the song or the artist, just that it's super-catchy) that is right-on about the anxious waiting for the weekend to begin.

Now that I'm working, I appreciate the weekend that much more. You have 5 days working, and just 2 days of the weekend, plus the goes-very-quickly Friday night. Here's a sample of what I've done the last few weekends:

1. Sit home and read the WSJ
2. Sit home and watch movies
3. Tennis on Saturday mornings.
4. Run up and down the stairs to save time not having to run outside.
5. Work out (probably the only time I have to develop my killer biceps, and by killer I mean very miniscule)
6. Santa Anita racetrack( went with work to bet on some horses, as luck would have it I bet on 4 different horses, none won, lost $20).
7. Watched NFL football at a bar with friends.
8. Survivor audition video (haven't heard back, probably have been rejected by reality TV for the 6th time).
9. study Chinese.
10. Halloween event at a bar

Notice nothing in there about a "date" or "wild party" or "stayed out all night." Man, by the end of the week I have no energy BUT to rest a bit at home and do some menial activities. Friday night, instead of being a big go-out time, is unwind and watch a movie time. Plus, I travel so much in my car from Monday to Friday I don't want to go anywhere during the week, just sit home for a while and enjoy some me-time, not go back outside and face the world. It's really a completely different mindset than when I was a 3L, when it was "go out, meet people, enjoy life, don't spend a second at home wasting your last year of freedom." Now that I'm not free, I am almost allergic to "freeing" activities.


* Btw, I do realize that the lack of date thing needs to change. I'm 24.5 years old and have been pretty much single exclusively throught law school....Ladies, you're telling me this blog doesn't convince you of how cool I am?


So yea, the bottom line is, I enjoy my weekend now in totally different ways. And I'm okay with it. Ultimately, the weekend is about how YOU want to enjoy YOUR free time, not how society usually spends it, or how other people spend it. It's what YOU feel like doing. Sometimes (Many times) there's nothing better than to just sit home and let the cable TV wash over you. As you listen to the song, "Yea, it's the freakin' weekend......"


O, here's a tip: Get the NFL Rewind package for $40.00 for the whole season, split the prescription with a friend, total cost $20.00 for all the games you want to see in their entirety. Great deal if you like football; I get all Charger games, all Bears games, and all my fantasy players' scoring plays. It's like heroin for fantasy football fanatics.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Mr. Yan Enters The Working World

So Yea, the end of September and all of October went by in a blur. My last post, September 18, was the day before I entered into the Full-Time Working World, My Last Day of Freedom, if you will. Since then.....it's been difficult. I've worked internships before, with summer jobs and 40-hour-a-week gigs sprinkled in there, but working full time is tough, especially since my job is like 1.5 hours and a harrowing (well, not harrowing but strenuous) 70-mile drive through suburban Los Angeles. I've found a law school friend of mine who will house my a couple nights of the week at his home closer to work, but still it's difficult.

It's hard to describe what the working world feels like. The positives: there's no more homework, the first time I've been able to say that since.....well, 4 years old, I think. I get paid. Not all that much, but I get paid for my labor, which is necessary since my first law school loan payment is due Dec. 24. I learn on the job......you know how they say you learn a lot more on the job than in school? "They"'re probably right. And I want that experience, I need that experience. Work leads to more work, which in itself is a little exciting but a little scary at the same time: You're an adult now.

The negatives: Long hours. Obviously different for different jobs, but I suspect many people share my same conditions: hours and hours at your desk in front of a computer, only briefly interrupted by the lunch hour, and constant drone of work. At school, you go to class for an hour or two, take a break, walk around, go to your next class....work is one long 9-hour stretch that blends into each other. A boss or two will monitor your work; you have assignments that actually need to be turned in (especially at a law firm, where there's court deadlines and whatnot). The most negative part of working (note: these are not at all complaints about the law firm I work at, which I actually like, these are complaints about work in general, the lifeblood of most humans everywhere where we spend almost half our waking hours but ironically kind of sucks the life out of us).

Anyway, long way of saying it's been a long 6.5 weeks (which isn't even as long as my longest stints of internships). It unfortunately leaves little time for me to do the other things in life I enjoy: Tennis, running, fantasy football, TV shows, web surfing, watching sports, reading novels, reading newspapers, trading stocks, visiting friends, vegetating, etc. etc. It alerts me to a somewhat grim but necessary reality: I'm going to be doing this for the rest of my working life (at least 40 years or so). Unless I'm struck my lightening, the world ends, or I win a ridiculous amount of winnings on the lottery, I will be working for the foreseeable future, and I have responsbilities to myself and others to do a good job. I'm up to the challenge.

I've been re-learning a lot of Chinese the last few weeks while at work (during my down-time); it's pretty exciting. I'm pretty sure I can go to China and live with the natives now, no problem; even maybe hold a job there, not that I'm considering that. But it really speaks to the whole "immersion" experience: You have to be in the environment of it, have to force yourself into situations where you use a different language, hear the other language, process the other language, feel it in your bones. Pretty much only way to get better for normal folk like me (maybe some language prodigies can just pick up a language from reading a book?) I can't. Heck, I've been learning and re-learning Chinese for 24 years now......I'm still not all the way there yet.

Quick suggestion: watch a Chinese TV show with subtitles. Specific one I just wrapped up is called "Marriage Battle" about contemporary Chinese families. Great show, gives you subtitles, and gives you a good sense (I think) of what goes on in modern Chinese society (the new Superpower of the World, rumor has it). Where can it be found? The Great Holy Channel that is Youtube.

I got a lot of catching up to do to match or exceed the 88 blog posts of 2010, back when I was still a student. Alas, I'll suck it up and give it my best shot for the rest of 2011.

Btw, My fantasy football winning streak is at 6. Lovin' life.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Halloween Happiness

Halloween's my second favorite holiday. I don't do much for my birthdays (if you count that as a holiday), I do nothing for Easter, eat a lot and feel bloated on Chinese New Year, feel sad that another year has passed on (The Normal) New Year's, eat a lot and feel bloated on Thanksgiving, celebrate off-days from school on MLK Day, Labor Day, etc. which I won't be getting off anymore depending on where I work, so yeah, Halloween and Christmas are pretty much it.


I love handing out candy. Something about it is gratifying; people from the rest of the community come to your door and share in the occasion that is Halloween: the yearly handoff of candy from one stranger to the next, which is basically an exchange because most likely as you're handing out candy to these strangers at your door, their parents/relatives are handing out candy at the same time to your children/relatives, so it's just a lot of candy changing hands.

I love it for another reason: I get to scare people. Ooooo boy. 3 years ago, my sister bought a Scream outfit with a bloody Scream mask.... it's really not that scary so much as scary, but to evidence the reality of "scary" being one-half being startled, people get really scared when they come to the door, it suddenly bursts open, and out pops me in the Scream costume right in their face!!!!! Awesome; I love it. Here are tips to pull this off, for those who share in my ambition of scaring others:

1. Only try it on Halloween night. You can't do this regularly and get away with it; It's once a year, one night only.
2. Obviously, wear something that's at least a little scary. No need to overdo it and get 3 costume designers, but a mask/face paint is necessary for the proper effect.
3. Wait right behind the front door for people to come. Don't let them see you!!!! (through the windows or something, it ruins the surprise) It takes some patience, I know. I've tried outside in the bushes, the garage, and other places. The door works the best, for you and for the element of the surprise.
4. As you're waiting behind the door, look through your peephole for people to come. Also use those flaps of skin hanging off your head, a.k.a. your ears, for enthusiastic victims, er, trick-or-treaters.
5. Timing is key: Just as your (victims) get to the door and are about to ring the doorbell, don't give them a chance to and rip open the door, and in one smooth motion (it has to be smooth, darn it!) jump out through the door at them. Not TOO close......
6. Watch out for kids. 4 ft and below is a good standard, I say, for how short is too short. Sure it's funny scary really young kids and making them have nightmares, but it's too easy. You want a challenge? Try scaring a skeptical 17-year-old teenager who's seen it all and wants to challenge your "aesthetic" interpretation of the Scream character and compare it to other mega-villains of horror films. Scare that kid and you get a bonus prize.
7. For added effect, after you hand out the candy to the kids, follow them creepily as they move on to the next house. That look over the shoulder might not indicate total fright, but I bet there were some goosebumps and shivers forming on the backs of those kids.
8. Probably the most important: DON'T SAY ANYTHING!!!! Especially if you're a non-human thing like Scream (who doesn't talk in the movie) or like a werewolf or something. It's the creepiness factor that gets to kids: Talking just humanizes and spoils the character; this is like Acting 101, I bet. If you want to be even creepier, pause a while and just stare at the kids. I got a couple kids to slink back toward their mommies waiting in the trick-or-treat van just by standing still.


This is just a little creepy tradition of mine; it's always fun and inspired by some of the houses I used to trick-or-treat at: dads faking their own deaths, scarecrows popping out of nowhere, etc. Halloween is the one time of year you get to be someone else for a change: why not be someone super-scary?

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Fantasy Football Euphoria

With Tenacious determination, uncanny talent evaluation, expert maneuvering, and a little bit of luck, DaMan has had one of the best managerial stretches of his fantasy football career in the last 10 days or so. Let’s replay what happened.

1.) At 3-2 and winner of 3 straight, DaMan enters Week 6 of the season having to face arguably the best 2 teams (Lee’s team is no joke, he could easily end up 7-6 and make the playoffs and the Rhythm Methodists) in the league, heavily equipped with breakout stars and fantasy studs like Jennings, CJ2K Johnson, Mathews, Graham, Gore, Garcon, Stafford, etc., etc. He’ll be lucky if he splits the games, and probably will go 0-2.
2.) DaMan picks up the Chicago D and Billy Cundiff (Baltimore K) from the free agent pool.
3.) DaMan has an awful beginning of the Sunday and is losing most of the way to Lee; it looks over. NOT SO FAST, my “Harvin an awful day” friend…… Billy Cundiff kicks 5 field goals (20 fantasy points),and Devin Hester+ Julius Peppers lead the Chicago Defense to a crucial 32 fantasy points on Sunday night, stunning Lee and edging him in the matchup 132-125 in come-from-behind fashion.
4.) Bobby trades Charlie Whitehurst quickly to Lance for Early Doucet (one-week rental)
5.) Later that night, DaMan gets busted for picking up too many QB’s in what he will refer to as “Pondergate,” thus depriving him of Christian Ponder and Carson Palmer.
6.) DaMan is thrown in jail without a hearing or trial, as the Commish enforces the harsh consequences of his own rule. Interestingly, the Commish does NOT pick up Christian Ponder for himself, even though he knows exactly when Ponder/Palmer will be released to the public.
7.) Lee owns Christian Ponder for all of 5 minutes before his own violative conduct is discovered; Ponder is released back into the pool and picked up by Liz Jiang. (Again, the Commish does NOT pick up Ponder even though he has 1 active QB for the next week).
8.) DaMan and Derek have heated exchange on the phone; Bobby’s pleas fall on deaf ears; Derek hangs up phone after hearing enough.
9.) Bobby apologizes, claims not to be a crook; Derek releases Bobby from his wrongful imprisonment.
10.) Bobby immediately picks up Maurice Morris knowing Jahvid Best left the game with his 19th concussion-related injury.
11.) Bobby picks up the “retired” Carson Palmer on Monday after the whole league had a chance to pick Palmer up KNOWING Bobby had tried to pick him up.
12.) On Tuesday morning, Carson Palmer is traded to Oakland from Cincinnati.
13.) Bobby makes several offers to QB-less teams for a one-week rental for Palmer…..gets Volk to bite and trade him Darius Heyward-Bey for the week.
14.) Bobby trades Sam Bradford (who was supposed to start at the time of trade, but later announced out for the week) to Liz Jiang for the aforementioned Christian Ponder, thus claiming both QB’s he wanted DESPITE being deprived of them earlier in the week.
15.) Lance scoffs at Bobby’s offer of Maurice Morris for Nate Washington
16.) Carson Palmer announced to be NOT starting for the Raiders
17.) Lance and Hayden compare ego sizes mid-week as to who’s the best team in the league. Hayden talks of routing DaMan; he has legitimate case with almost his whole team playing in Week 7 while DaMan has Nicks, Maclin, Cruz, and Vernon Davis on the Bye.
18.) Christian Ponder throws (and runs!) for 17 fantasy points; Sam Bradford declared out before the game; status for Week 8 in doubt.
19.) Early Doucet gets late TD to post 11.5 fantasy points; Charlie Whitehurst gets -3 points for Lance.
20.) Darrius Heyward-Bey posts 10.5 points; Palmer throws 3 picks en route to -5 fantasy points.
21.) Maurice Morris posts 7 points; Nate Washington puts up 1.5.
22.) DaMan leads the self-proclaimed “Best Team in the league and knows where he’ll be at the end of the season” Rhythm Methodists 144.5-125 with only Hayden’s kicker to go.
23.) Unless Lance pulls off a Monday Night Miracle, DaMan has a great chance to vault into first place in the league if MJD can outscore Mike Thomas.

Sorry to brag, but I will probably never have such a euphoric week of managerial prowess. Call me lucky, call me “peaked too soon,” whatever, but there’s no doubt in my mind I turned 2 losses into wins the last 2 weeks and turned a devastating situation (3 QB’s injured + 4 other guys on a bye) into an advantage into a win. I LOOOOOOOOVVVVEEEEE Fantasy Football!!!!
5-game winning streak. Who’s next????? Who’s left?????????


Fantasize on,

Robert Yan