When I go on vacation, I often get lost. I don't use internet in foreign countries and I do pretty well with subway maps and reading street directions to get a general sense of where I am, but it happens to the best of them: I get lost. When I get lost, the worst of me comes out. Here's some of the thoughts I have:
1.) WHERE AM I???? Boku toshita koto ga! (What's gotten into me? It's so unlike me to get lost!)
2.) I should probably head back the way I came and find out where I am!
3.) Instant rejection of No.2 : NO! Turning back is admitting defeat! Onward or else! (For some reason I have a lot of pride about randomly picking directions)
4.) At least I'm getting good exercise (excuse to cover up how hopelessly lost I am)
5.) I should probably ask somebody
6.) Instant rejection of No. 5: NO! Asking someone is admitting defeat! I'll do it myself! (More nonsensical pride)
7.) I sweat so easily. Especially outside, a short walk in medium temperatures can make my body wet and sweat through my shirt, adding to the panic.
8.) Panic! I only have x amount of time to get where I'm going!
9.) (Curse word!) (Curse word!) (Curse word!)
10.) I'm tired!
11.) I'm wasting time going in circles! I'll never get those 5 minutes I just spent circling around back! Noo!!!!!!
12.) (If driving: When did the guy in front of me just cut me off? C'mon dude!) -cause of road rage.
Now imagine all those things about getting lost apply, and then add the part of a timeline for being somewhere, and that lovely MJ was waiting for me (when MJ waits for me, she looks in the direction of where I should be coming from and looks straight ahead unblinking, like a woman on the beach waiting for her husband's ship to arrive home - I've snuck up on her and witnessed this firsthand). It's a very loving and heartwarming symbol of her devotion and affection, but it also puts a lot of pressure on me.
Korean shopping malls are a bit of a maze, especially the Shinsegae mall in Busan, really put me to shame and humbled me quite a bit. First of all, there's 2 parallel buildings that are connected by a small walkway, and being in one can easily be mistaken for being in the other. MJ and I had gone earlier in the day to a bookstore in the shopping mall, and after splitting up at Spa World (a Disney world of spas, more on this later) we decided to meet back at the bookstore. I thought I had plenty of time entering into the mall to get to a bookstore, but immediately I was thrown for a loop by the multiple stories of the mall that all look similar, and the ground floor isn't the bottom floor.......there's a subway level as well as upper levels to the mall. I look around for the mall directory/map.....every mall has one, right? But it's all in Korean! And I've forgotten what the bookstore's name is, it has a Korean name! And I don't know the Korean word for bookstore! Ahhh!!!! I start panicking, I go up one floor by escalator, then wander aimlessly looking for the bookstore, don't find it, backtrack to go downstairs only to find out the escalator down is not in the same location as the escalator up, so I have to go find that, all the while dodging other shoppers who are packed in this mall (there are a LOT of Asian people in this world), I think of asking somone, ANYONE who can help me but I might not even know their directions in Korean, and I still don't know how to say bookstore in Korean! Then I realize there's a PARALLEL building on the other side. Now officially late and know that MJ is probably at the bookstore waiting, her gaze piercing the doorway where I should be coming through any second, she thinks. Ahhh! The one thing I dislike more than getting stuck in traffic and having to wait is making OTHER people wait and have to wait for me! In the parallel building I see familiar stores from our previous visit to the bookstore but STILL can't retrace my steps, there's too many twists and turns, the mall is not built in a square or any discernable shape or structure, seemingly a mass of stairs and escalators in random places. At this point I'm just trying everything and losing all sense of space and time and dimension, just moving my feet forward one at a time hoping I'll eventually catch a glimpse of this elusive bookstore, which might as well be a unicorn or a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow at this point, I just can't find it. I desperately need to get to MJ! She's waiting for me in such a caring and affectionate way!
And then finally my wifi connects and I can send a message to MJ. Thank god for the internet. I am really terrible at being lost.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
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