Listening to “Lovefool” by the Cardigans which amazingly
came out in 1996…..hmm is that right?
I’m not calling it a success yet, but I’m happy to report
that recently I’ve been dating a girl who I like for several weeks now, and (I
think) we actually like each other! Imagine that! It’s really one of the most
awesome feelings in the world to know that someone else in the world cares
about you. Obviously I have friends and people who appreciate me as a friend,
but having someone like me is a pretty rare experience and one that I treasure
while it’s ongoing. It makes dating worthwhile and all those other failed dates
seem like just a slight detour that I just learned from.
It also emphasizes that online dating is good and all, but
meeting someone organically is still the best policy. My special friend and I
met and started talking, so we built up a nice repertoire already, a solid
foundation of conversation that I could see myself continuing over a date or
something. It builds a more solid foundation than the dating site conversations
over the internet that don’t come over real well, there’s no looking into one’s
eyes to see if they’re genuine or not.
When I am with my date, it feels like minutes are hours, and
hours are days……and not in a bad way like in a lecture or anything. I feel like
I’m in a different world of interpersonal experience, like everything I do at
work or at home watching sports is pretty insignificant (not that I devalue my
work) compared to what is going no at that moment, where we’re getting along
perfectly. It also helps that we have a lot of common interests (I knew
watching Veronica Mars while studying for the Bar would pay off! We recently
both watched the Veronica Mars movie separately without knowing that the other
was slightly interested in it). Honestly, I am having fun on these dates, as
opposed to feeling like it’s a bit of work.
An internet date seems somewhat like work, there is a set 2
hours or so I devote to that, and then afterwards it’s pretty much over. We don’t
see each other over the course of the week, not much interaction over the
course of days. It’s not consistent contact. (Maybe that’s just my failure to
do so, but I think it’s an inherent flaw in online dating). My special friend
and I have a consistent way of contact that I really appreciate and I think it
roots from having kind of been friends first. We have a Tuesday night
facebook-chat session that goes on for quite a while. I used to just let
Tuesdays go by! (No dodgeball, generally a quite sports night, a mid-week school/work
night) Now I really look forward to that time. I have a really positive outlook
on life right now, and I think it’s because of this relationship I have…..it’s
very healthy for me, almost as healthy as laughing 2 times a day.
And how do I know she likes me back? Well there’s the
laughing at jokes, initiating conversations with me, returning my texts,
agreeing to go on dates with me…….that never happens for me! It’s like I can do
no wrong, like walking on water!
The same walking-on-water feeling can be had in playing
fantasy sports. Sometimes when a player that I’ve invested a prodigious amount
of time and effort into suddenly starts producing, I feel like they actually are
starting to love me back. “Hey, you do notice that I’ve drafted you in every
draft in the last 3 years, thanks for noticing!” In fantasy hoops this year
that player is Isiah Thomas, aka “The Pizza Guy” cuz he delivers. I’ve followed
his career ever since his time at University of Washington and this
buzzer-beating shot narrated by Gus Johnson. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlcJbATdMfA.
He came into the league with no hype as the 60th overall pick in
2011 but stuck with the Kings, emerged as an exciting rookie, and then finally “was
freed” this year after starting the year behind Greivis Vazquez, of all people.
Our relationship is very special, and I’m glad I’ve stuck around long enough to
see it all the way through.
Being liked in real life and in fantasy sports is like a
fantasy come true. (cue cheezy music)
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
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