Two and a half years ago, I embarked on a journey that I knew would be difficult and treacherous, a journey that would test my inner resolve and give me an opportunity to see what I was really made of. On Friday, that journey ended with my law school graduation at USC. In many respects, it was a great accomplishment: obtaining a graduate degree at a top-tier university like USC is no laughing matter in the US, something that most people in the world do not have the opportunity to attempt, much less complete. My two hundred + JD colleagues and I did it: we stuck around long enough and fought hard enough to get through, and now we have that golden diploma to hang on our walls forever, two extra letters next to our credentials that we can add.
So why am I not necessarily satisfied? Well, as I had feared for the past 2 years now, ever since I "struck out" at OCI (On-campus interviewing) at USC in August 2009, I do not have definite post-graduation employment plans. I have missed the boat on "Big Law," the proverbial Promised Land for law school graduates everywhere, where successful law school careers are supposed to begin, and salaries begin in six figures. Like about 60% (rough figure based on anecdotal evidence and educated projection of the employment status of the class) of my class, I have joined the ranks of "still looking for work."
Honestly, I am pretty discouraged by my current situation. I've been trying to avoid this position all my life: working hard in grade school through high school to get good grades and make it to a good college, joining all kinds of extracurricular programs to bolster my resume, joining different honors programs to make myself more marketable, choosing a career-oriented major in undergrad (finance), going to a professional degree program (law), working various internships during law school to try to develop into a full-time position, working my butt off throughout law school, all while hoping to get going in my career as the first-born in my family to help out my parents, letting them retire early and contributing to my sister's college fund. Honestly, those goals were not that far off; if I had just done maybe 0.2 GPA points better in law school, I would have most likely landed one of those coveted "big law" positions in my 2nd year of law school; I would have had a good shot at being offered a full-time attorney position at one of those law firms, and I would be starting sometime between September-December of this year at one of those law firms. The goal's happening for several of my friends; it is not for me. That is maybe the worst part: knowing that the classmates I started law school with are going on to bigger, better things, while I'm doing the opposite, falling to ground zero and having to start my career from basically, scratch. Knowing that a couple minor things going differently would have allowed me to join their ranks, but now I will never ever have a chance to break into this mystical land called "big law," that that "door of opportunity" has forever closed for me.
How bad is it? "Experts" in the legal market disagree, but the general consensus is that law school students graduating without a job lined up are in deep trouble. Sure, you can wait for your bar results (come out November), but there's no guarantee you'll find anything, and graduates are basically at the mercy of hiring needs in "small and mid-size firms" world, where jobs are far and few between and sometimes are not even publicized; the firms definitely are not coming to recruit you; you'll have to do whatever you can to even get those interviews, including utilizing this vague, undefined skill set known as "networking." The problem with a law school degree is, if you play your cards right, you land a job that begins at $160,000 annual salary plus bonuses; if you play your cards wrong, you end up volunteering your time for pro-bono or working for very low wages and having to start at a bargain-basement level for independent law firms: 2 very divergent outcomes; no in-between. I have apparently played my cards wrong. Sometimes, my hopes will be raised by obtaining part-time employment through an internship, or hearing about some sort of job opportunity, some macroeconomic pattern supposedly leading to stronger hiring trends, but in general, there is a general mood of dissatisfaction and discouragement in terms of my career prospects in the law.
In fact, one of the most discouraging stories came the morning before graduation, where I just smack ran into a former law student at USC who graduated a year before me. After the initial formalities, I asked him a fairly standard question that I'm coming to suspect I will have difficulties answering soon: Q: "So what are you up to?" The answer was expected, but devastating nonetheless: "looking for work." Ouch. That's tough. So not only is my class struggling, the class from last year is STILL struggling. Sigh. How big's the logjam of unemployed lawyers? USC won't tell us, but it doesn't look very good.
I feel it necessary to supplement my post with the qualifier that I'm still upbeat about other parts of my life; I'm now in the best shape of my life, I have a great relationship with my parents and sister, who are all really healthy, I haven't gotten sick in 3 years, I enjoy life and realize how lucky I am to be young and living in America with my own car, on top of living in one of the most vibrant cities in the world, Los Angeles. I get that; that is all totally separate from my work life, which is in a much more unfavorable position.
So looking back on my last 3 years, there's definitely a sense of regret, a fear of "have I wasted 3 prime years of my life to get a worthless degree that puts me in a worse career position and in much deeper debt than I would have been in 3 years ago?" settling in. It's a very important and costly life lesson to have learned. But I go back to some of the old sayings that got me through tough situations in the past: "Energy, Optimism, Enthusiasm." "When the going gets tough, the tough get going." "Character is how you deal with adversity." I go forth with a mix of discouragement and subdued optimism and a question that can only be answered three years from now: "What will I be up to 3 years from now?"
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
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