Always nice to appreciate myself once in awhile, and after this I'll go grab myself a cookie too.
I see that I'm on my 52nd post of 2009 already, and it's only August 31st. Really proud of myself this year for posting consistently, got representation in every month which is more reflective of an overall body of work (like a series of balance sheets of a Fortune 500 company) showing various states of mind (or in the case of spelling bee/Big Brother this year, addiction) that I've been in.
I really appreciate that I have this blog. And I know people actually read it. Next to academic prowess + character fitness, probably one of my long-lasting achievements.
I really appreciate that I can look at things w/ a sense of humor. Broken record alert: * you gotta laugh at least twice a day. *
I appreciate that I take responsiblity in a lot of things that I do. I really do take leadership, whether it's helping running different organizations in college (Illinois Fantasy Football, SIFE, and now APALSA), make sacrifices for the team.
I appreciate Juan Gutierrez.
I appreciate that there's something in the world like Big Brother that can allow me work my competitive juices, hone my chess-playing skills to think about different scenarios, and have 5-minute sweat sessions where all the power in the game shifts in the span of 4 questions.
I appreciate not being involved in any California wildfires yet.....cross fingers.
I appreciate still being able to appreciate Chinese food after all these years of eating it. Like college freshman, the beauty of Chinese food is that they never get older.
I appreciate that I will start an internship at a law firm tomorrow and appreciate its value to me even though it's unpaid.
I appreciate that things might if things aren't going so well now, life has twists and turns, you just gotta hold the steering wheel level, laugh in the face of adversity (again, part of the laughing 2 times a day) and stay on the road, cuz something good can be right around the next bend.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Monday, August 31, 2009
The "Omega" Fantasy Baseball Post
Calling it "Omega" cuz I did a prodigious midseason report for my 16-person fantasy baseball league that I'm not sure all members appreciated, but I consider it a masterpiece. Sigh, if only firms would read it as my writing sample. Why am I posting it? Cuz it's like a time capsule, don't want to lose it, and I know it's probably safe on the Internet. And, I want to justify the hour of my life I will never get back working on it. Enjoy.
This was posted on my league in mid-July, so slightly out of date, but the jokes are (hopefully) very original and very fresh.
___________________________________________________________________
Last night, I had a dream. The dream had 3 unforgettable portions:
1.) I was in court and the judge asked me a question and I responded, "yea." The judge immediately rebuked, "That's yes, your honor." I looked up into the face of the Honorable Michael Jackson.
2.) I was walking along Broadway in downtown LA and wasn't watching where I was going and tripped on a homeless guy on the sidewalk, who got up and started yelling at me in slurred and incomprehensible language. At first I thought it was a judge, but the unmistakable face of Michael Jackson looked back at me.
3.) the last part was just words, no visuals: I heard a divine voice in my head, saying, “ Go forth, RobertDaManYan, and createth me a midseason report on USC Law 2011 Fantasy Baseball website. The speaker of these words was no other than Michael Jackson.
I will now fulfill Michael Jackson’s dream and proceed to drop my pants…..I mean write this midseason report (sort of).
1.) Team Katinja:
My reaction to Katinja’s performance is like waking up in a Vegas hotel with a tiger and a baby in the same suite, or getting grades back at USC Law and finding that that the guy who smokes the most pot got the best grades…..”WHAT THE &*^% HAPPENED?” Through the first part of the season, Katinja has won twice as many games as he has lost, hasn’t lost a matchup since the first week of finals, and doing all this while in a drunken stupor most of the time. Impressive is understating it.
Grade: A
Area most in need of improvement: Outfield star power. Cody Ross will not do it for a championship team.
2.) Joe’s Bombers:
Joe needs to do to his players what Donald Trump did to Miss California: fire them w/o remorse. Finding talent on this team is like finding jokes on “The Office” nowadays: few and far between. The truly sad part is that Fat Albert is having the year of his life but doing it for a last-place team including the likes of Casey “Is this Willis?” McGehee, Adam “not as sexy as JF, Robert, or even Ted” Kennedy, and absolutely no closers. The Washington Nationals look at Joe’s team and cringe.
Grade: D ( and you gotta try to get a D in law school)
Area most in need: Pick up a “How to play fantasy baseball” newspaper at your local grocery store.
3.) IceCream Socialists:
Winless in his first 4 matchups, Hayden fooled us all and is in playoff contention, coming a carlos lee 3-run homer short of beating Team Katinja last week. Like Jose Canseco, Sammy Sosa, and o so many others, Hayden has injected himself into the stream of conversation and now is solidly in the hunt and has the tools to do damage.
Grade: B+
Most needed: Catcher (I’ve exhausted the bad things I can say about John Baker)
4.) Michael’s Boys:
Every time I see this team I think of the Lady Gaga saw “Love Games” because Derek brings new meaning to “taking a ride on a disco stick,” getting screwed in various trades he’s made like sending off Russell branyan for a bag of peanuts, jettisoning A-Rod for a bag of balls and deciding Ryan Braun and Nick Markakis were not good enough for his exquisite tastes, then brilliantly proclaiming he had become the “favorite in the league.” If he means “everyone’s favorite team to play,” then yes.
Grade: B
Most in need of: a better team name (too soon, too soon)
5.) inAD:
Like Jamie Lynn Sigler (Meadow Soprano) hooking up wiith Turtle in Entourage, inAD does not deserve what he’s got. Somehow, with some of the greatest hitters in the league in Carlos Beltran, Mark Teixeria, Raul Ibanez, and Ryan Zimmerman, inAD is 15 games below .500. No amount of phone sex, driving to San Diego, or being Vinny Chase’s personal errand boy is gonna get this guy back in the game. He’s ruined his season, and there’s no turning back.
Grade: C
Most in need of: better management, get better supporting cast around your stars and you can tear up the league.
6.) Kevdog’s Ballers:
When I see this team I’m reminded of Lost when Richard went to Locke as a kid and let him choose between all sorts of crap like a baseball, comic book, knife, compass, fishing net, etc., and Locke eventually became the chosen one. Kevin is the opposite of what inAD has been, being the leader of his people and leading them to victory after victory, despite until-now-unheard-of guys like adam “even though toronto is a horrible city” lind, aaron “toronto has homeless guys on every street that you might trip on” hill (nice trade with lance), and scott “everyone who goes to toronto grows an extra nipple” rolen.
Grade: A-
Most in need of: the Mets to get healthy and relevant so Reyes and Delgado can supplement the incredible pitching prowess.
7.) JC’s Crusaders:
New christened as “Optimus Prime,” Imran truly channels the spirit of the Transformers by reinventing himself into a .500 team. In the first 6 weeks, this team was like the 101 FWY every evening, clogged with sweaty, white men going nowhere, trapped by the inevitability of traffic, eventually turning into a clusterfuck. The last few weeks have been like having to do legal writing and then not having to do legal writing: so much better.
Grade: B-
Area need to improve most: power. Not a home run hitting team.
8. Comedic Relief
It’s hard to describe how I felt when Lee picked up Scott Richmond and cheated to win his matchup a few weeks ago. At first I denied that it happened, telling myself repeatedly that this was Lee, we had gone through Legal Profession together, he couldn’t have. Then I was angry, yelling unspeakable profanities in the middle of court, challenging my sister to tennis just so I could hit Andy Roddick-like serves at her face, and sending abrasive emails to Gabby Ryan demanding she dress better next time she strutted around test rooms during exam season. Next, I tried to bargain with a higher being- if I help an old person across the street today, can Lee’s mistake never have happened? I was also depressed for a while, taking up bikram yoga just to subject myself to extreme pain and unendurable positions. Finally, after Lee wrote his tearful apology, I accepted the state of things and realized that no matter how good a fantasy commissioner I am, there are some things I cannot control, including how god-awful Lee’s team is.
Grade: F
Area need to improve most on: not cheating.
9. UCanPutitOntheBoard:
Like a young boy w/ Turret’s, Lance periodically yells out smack talk, urging his players to “Stretch! Stretch!” And stretch they have, getting to 20 games above .500 despite david wright’s utter inability to hit home runs, carlos pena’s utter inability to bat for average, and Milton Bradley’s utter inability to avoid ticking off his manager, throwing the ball into the stands with 2 outs or just being a general menace to the Cubs organization.
Grade: A-
Needs to improve: having Milton Bradley on his team, easily resolved by the “drop” button.
10.) Praying to PECOTA:
Watching Jibraun’s team has been like watching dumb contestants play the Wheel of Fortune: constantly doing the wrong things. When the answer should be painfully obvious, they guess wrong. When they should spin again, they buy a vowel. Supposed to solve the puzzle, they spin one last desperate time and look shocked when they go bankrupt. Shame. A guy who I thought was guaranteed one of the playoff spots at the beginning, I am no longer so sure as the team hovers around .500, andy “not even as good as adam” laroche starts at 3rd, and the stable of young pitching that seemed like an asset now looks as weak as Shouvik’s pre-Viagra sex drive.
Grade: B-
Needs to improve: elite starting pitching (needs an ace)
11.) Tony’s Tigers:
Hard to say what’s wrong with this team, feel like Tony needs to speak up more, get the blood riled, act like ozzie guillen and curse profusely while killing some chickens or lou pinella by kicking and screaming and throwing bases and raising blood pressure to the point of almost blowing a gasket.
Grade: C-
Needs to improve: pitching staff (both relief and starting) behind Santana.
12. phillyrepeat
Picked at one time by “the Man” to work his way into the playoffs, phillyrepeat has went the way of the actual Phillies: lots of flash, big names galore, enough potential to fuel a power plant, but not enough results. Random lawyer joke: There are three reasons why lawyers are being used more and more in scientific experiments. First, every year there are more of them around. Second, lab assistants don't get attached to them. And, third, there are some things that rats just won't do.
Grade: C
Needs to improve: the whole offense besides Bay and Howard.
13. Lawyroids:
I can’t imagine anyone who’s more devastated by Michael’s passing than our league’s very own Pedophile. I picture Ian’s room filled with pictures of him and Michael at Neverland Ranch, smiling raucously as they ponder the delicious things they will do. The similarities are eerie: Ian, at his computer, scouring the waiver wire looking for fresh, young talent; Michael, on his computer, scouring Boy Scouts profiles for young talent; Ian, taking the talent under his wing and using them to his delight, then dropping them off like nothing ever happened. And then today, picking up Elvis Andrus again for a 2nd go. Sigh. I suspect Ian has managed his team well enough to make the playoffs as Nolasco, Vazquez, and Sabathia should give him enough pitching while just getting enough offense.
Grade: B+
Needs to improve: outfield and shortstop.
14. Learned Handjob:
The outfield of Braun, Sizemore, and Markakis could be the best there is. Otherwise, with Webb probably out for season, Billingsley not enough to be a one-man pitching staff.
Grade: C
Needs to improve: Lotsa stuff to get into contention.
15. PirateShoes:
Like watching a typical Disney movie in reverse, Blake had a happily ever after April in which all the flowers bloomed, he slipped on the glass slipper, met the man of his dreams, and found his Prince Charming, but ever since then he’s bit into the poison apple, got pushed off the top of the league mountain to be trampled by the herd below, and don’t forget about being plowed by Creepy Rodney. In a typical Disney, the time of most despair is the time when the hero bounces back. Can Prince Fielder and his gazillon RBI’s and gazillon pounds of fat or Josh Hamilton and his gazillon tattoos depicting his weird cocaine-induced experiences be that hero? Doubt it.
Grade: B
Needs to improve: catcher and plugging in random bad guys at Util.
16. RobertDaManYan: The man amjur’ed all his fantasy baseball classes in fantasy baseball school and will make it onto fantasy baseball review and moot court baseball because he’s just that good. Plus, next year he will be a fantasy baseball writing fellow, teaching fantasy baseball players everywhere how to write excellent midseason preview.
Grade: DaMan’s so good he gives out the gradesNeeds to improve: making other managers feel better about themselves and not as inadequate.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
This was posted on my league in mid-July, so slightly out of date, but the jokes are (hopefully) very original and very fresh.
___________________________________________________________________
Last night, I had a dream. The dream had 3 unforgettable portions:
1.) I was in court and the judge asked me a question and I responded, "yea." The judge immediately rebuked, "That's yes, your honor." I looked up into the face of the Honorable Michael Jackson.
2.) I was walking along Broadway in downtown LA and wasn't watching where I was going and tripped on a homeless guy on the sidewalk, who got up and started yelling at me in slurred and incomprehensible language. At first I thought it was a judge, but the unmistakable face of Michael Jackson looked back at me.
3.) the last part was just words, no visuals: I heard a divine voice in my head, saying, “ Go forth, RobertDaManYan, and createth me a midseason report on USC Law 2011 Fantasy Baseball website. The speaker of these words was no other than Michael Jackson.
I will now fulfill Michael Jackson’s dream and proceed to drop my pants…..I mean write this midseason report (sort of).
1.) Team Katinja:
My reaction to Katinja’s performance is like waking up in a Vegas hotel with a tiger and a baby in the same suite, or getting grades back at USC Law and finding that that the guy who smokes the most pot got the best grades…..”WHAT THE &*^% HAPPENED?” Through the first part of the season, Katinja has won twice as many games as he has lost, hasn’t lost a matchup since the first week of finals, and doing all this while in a drunken stupor most of the time. Impressive is understating it.
Grade: A
Area most in need of improvement: Outfield star power. Cody Ross will not do it for a championship team.
2.) Joe’s Bombers:
Joe needs to do to his players what Donald Trump did to Miss California: fire them w/o remorse. Finding talent on this team is like finding jokes on “The Office” nowadays: few and far between. The truly sad part is that Fat Albert is having the year of his life but doing it for a last-place team including the likes of Casey “Is this Willis?” McGehee, Adam “not as sexy as JF, Robert, or even Ted” Kennedy, and absolutely no closers. The Washington Nationals look at Joe’s team and cringe.
Grade: D ( and you gotta try to get a D in law school)
Area most in need: Pick up a “How to play fantasy baseball” newspaper at your local grocery store.
3.) IceCream Socialists:
Winless in his first 4 matchups, Hayden fooled us all and is in playoff contention, coming a carlos lee 3-run homer short of beating Team Katinja last week. Like Jose Canseco, Sammy Sosa, and o so many others, Hayden has injected himself into the stream of conversation and now is solidly in the hunt and has the tools to do damage.
Grade: B+
Most needed: Catcher (I’ve exhausted the bad things I can say about John Baker)
4.) Michael’s Boys:
Every time I see this team I think of the Lady Gaga saw “Love Games” because Derek brings new meaning to “taking a ride on a disco stick,” getting screwed in various trades he’s made like sending off Russell branyan for a bag of peanuts, jettisoning A-Rod for a bag of balls and deciding Ryan Braun and Nick Markakis were not good enough for his exquisite tastes, then brilliantly proclaiming he had become the “favorite in the league.” If he means “everyone’s favorite team to play,” then yes.
Grade: B
Most in need of: a better team name (too soon, too soon)
5.) inAD:
Like Jamie Lynn Sigler (Meadow Soprano) hooking up wiith Turtle in Entourage, inAD does not deserve what he’s got. Somehow, with some of the greatest hitters in the league in Carlos Beltran, Mark Teixeria, Raul Ibanez, and Ryan Zimmerman, inAD is 15 games below .500. No amount of phone sex, driving to San Diego, or being Vinny Chase’s personal errand boy is gonna get this guy back in the game. He’s ruined his season, and there’s no turning back.
Grade: C
Most in need of: better management, get better supporting cast around your stars and you can tear up the league.
6.) Kevdog’s Ballers:
When I see this team I’m reminded of Lost when Richard went to Locke as a kid and let him choose between all sorts of crap like a baseball, comic book, knife, compass, fishing net, etc., and Locke eventually became the chosen one. Kevin is the opposite of what inAD has been, being the leader of his people and leading them to victory after victory, despite until-now-unheard-of guys like adam “even though toronto is a horrible city” lind, aaron “toronto has homeless guys on every street that you might trip on” hill (nice trade with lance), and scott “everyone who goes to toronto grows an extra nipple” rolen.
Grade: A-
Most in need of: the Mets to get healthy and relevant so Reyes and Delgado can supplement the incredible pitching prowess.
7.) JC’s Crusaders:
New christened as “Optimus Prime,” Imran truly channels the spirit of the Transformers by reinventing himself into a .500 team. In the first 6 weeks, this team was like the 101 FWY every evening, clogged with sweaty, white men going nowhere, trapped by the inevitability of traffic, eventually turning into a clusterfuck. The last few weeks have been like having to do legal writing and then not having to do legal writing: so much better.
Grade: B-
Area need to improve most: power. Not a home run hitting team.
8. Comedic Relief
It’s hard to describe how I felt when Lee picked up Scott Richmond and cheated to win his matchup a few weeks ago. At first I denied that it happened, telling myself repeatedly that this was Lee, we had gone through Legal Profession together, he couldn’t have. Then I was angry, yelling unspeakable profanities in the middle of court, challenging my sister to tennis just so I could hit Andy Roddick-like serves at her face, and sending abrasive emails to Gabby Ryan demanding she dress better next time she strutted around test rooms during exam season. Next, I tried to bargain with a higher being- if I help an old person across the street today, can Lee’s mistake never have happened? I was also depressed for a while, taking up bikram yoga just to subject myself to extreme pain and unendurable positions. Finally, after Lee wrote his tearful apology, I accepted the state of things and realized that no matter how good a fantasy commissioner I am, there are some things I cannot control, including how god-awful Lee’s team is.
Grade: F
Area need to improve most on: not cheating.
9. UCanPutitOntheBoard:
Like a young boy w/ Turret’s, Lance periodically yells out smack talk, urging his players to “Stretch! Stretch!” And stretch they have, getting to 20 games above .500 despite david wright’s utter inability to hit home runs, carlos pena’s utter inability to bat for average, and Milton Bradley’s utter inability to avoid ticking off his manager, throwing the ball into the stands with 2 outs or just being a general menace to the Cubs organization.
Grade: A-
Needs to improve: having Milton Bradley on his team, easily resolved by the “drop” button.
10.) Praying to PECOTA:
Watching Jibraun’s team has been like watching dumb contestants play the Wheel of Fortune: constantly doing the wrong things. When the answer should be painfully obvious, they guess wrong. When they should spin again, they buy a vowel. Supposed to solve the puzzle, they spin one last desperate time and look shocked when they go bankrupt. Shame. A guy who I thought was guaranteed one of the playoff spots at the beginning, I am no longer so sure as the team hovers around .500, andy “not even as good as adam” laroche starts at 3rd, and the stable of young pitching that seemed like an asset now looks as weak as Shouvik’s pre-Viagra sex drive.
Grade: B-
Needs to improve: elite starting pitching (needs an ace)
11.) Tony’s Tigers:
Hard to say what’s wrong with this team, feel like Tony needs to speak up more, get the blood riled, act like ozzie guillen and curse profusely while killing some chickens or lou pinella by kicking and screaming and throwing bases and raising blood pressure to the point of almost blowing a gasket.
Grade: C-
Needs to improve: pitching staff (both relief and starting) behind Santana.
12. phillyrepeat
Picked at one time by “the Man” to work his way into the playoffs, phillyrepeat has went the way of the actual Phillies: lots of flash, big names galore, enough potential to fuel a power plant, but not enough results. Random lawyer joke: There are three reasons why lawyers are being used more and more in scientific experiments. First, every year there are more of them around. Second, lab assistants don't get attached to them. And, third, there are some things that rats just won't do.
Grade: C
Needs to improve: the whole offense besides Bay and Howard.
13. Lawyroids:
I can’t imagine anyone who’s more devastated by Michael’s passing than our league’s very own Pedophile. I picture Ian’s room filled with pictures of him and Michael at Neverland Ranch, smiling raucously as they ponder the delicious things they will do. The similarities are eerie: Ian, at his computer, scouring the waiver wire looking for fresh, young talent; Michael, on his computer, scouring Boy Scouts profiles for young talent; Ian, taking the talent under his wing and using them to his delight, then dropping them off like nothing ever happened. And then today, picking up Elvis Andrus again for a 2nd go. Sigh. I suspect Ian has managed his team well enough to make the playoffs as Nolasco, Vazquez, and Sabathia should give him enough pitching while just getting enough offense.
Grade: B+
Needs to improve: outfield and shortstop.
14. Learned Handjob:
The outfield of Braun, Sizemore, and Markakis could be the best there is. Otherwise, with Webb probably out for season, Billingsley not enough to be a one-man pitching staff.
Grade: C
Needs to improve: Lotsa stuff to get into contention.
15. PirateShoes:
Like watching a typical Disney movie in reverse, Blake had a happily ever after April in which all the flowers bloomed, he slipped on the glass slipper, met the man of his dreams, and found his Prince Charming, but ever since then he’s bit into the poison apple, got pushed off the top of the league mountain to be trampled by the herd below, and don’t forget about being plowed by Creepy Rodney. In a typical Disney, the time of most despair is the time when the hero bounces back. Can Prince Fielder and his gazillon RBI’s and gazillon pounds of fat or Josh Hamilton and his gazillon tattoos depicting his weird cocaine-induced experiences be that hero? Doubt it.
Grade: B
Needs to improve: catcher and plugging in random bad guys at Util.
16. RobertDaManYan: The man amjur’ed all his fantasy baseball classes in fantasy baseball school and will make it onto fantasy baseball review and moot court baseball because he’s just that good. Plus, next year he will be a fantasy baseball writing fellow, teaching fantasy baseball players everywhere how to write excellent midseason preview.
Grade: DaMan’s so good he gives out the gradesNeeds to improve: making other managers feel better about themselves and not as inadequate.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Prognosticating Fantasy Football, a.k.a. Rolling the Dice...
You know, a few years ago I would be deliriously looking forward to this post. Eyes bloodshot from reading all the fantasy football cheatsheats, mind racing from devouring every piece of information I could find, finger hurting from clicking on Shaun Alexander's stats all the time, mouth salivating at the thought of stealing Clinton Portis in the late first-round, I would be all over this. After all, fantasy football was my maiden voyage into the mystical realm of fantasy sports. and I have never left. However, my course has admittedly shifted a bit to basketball and baseball, while millions of football fanatics turn to it every year as a source of relief from one's home football team, and as a source of soothing their gambling needs (which I condone, but it happens).
What I've realized (and reiterated time and time again on this blog) is that fantasy football is more a roll of a dice, a shot in the dark, a prayer that your #1 RB won't blow out his MCL in Week 2. Thing happen week to week, guys are picked up from off the street by teams (mostly by Denver) and made into the feature back, guys you haven't even heard of sub in and toss up 4-TD games....it's crazy, but I still love it.
Here are my gut feelings/ analytically-supported findings (with the VERY STRONG precaution that I'm not responsible for them):
1.) DeAngelo Williams fits my "don't draft immediately after he's had his career year" criterion, but what I'm more worried about is how much playing time he gets w/ Jonathan Stewart there, and if there's any question about that, he shouldn't be your #1 RB. Avoid.
2.) Ronnie Brown: Picking the best player is so crucial in fantasy football, I know plenty of years where someone's invested on a player "in the best situation" and then found the guy playing themselves out of position cuz they didn't have the skills to start with. Folks, Ronnie Brown has the skills. And he's only 27.
3.) Peyton Manning: Am I missing something here? He had 4 less TD's last year and people calling it the apocalypse, never mind the guaranteed 4000 yards and eliteness. If you're drafti this guy after Dwayne Bowe, Pierre Thomas, or Aaron Rodgers!!!!?????, you're kidding yourself.
4.) Every year I'm reminded that football is a young man's sport, especially at the RB position. (Last year, Matt Forte KILLED me). I'd say it's like casting cute kids for toothpaste commericals, the younger the better. That's why Ray Rice comes to mind, Knowshon Moreno is enticing, and Donald Brown seems like one Addai injury away from stardom. I'd say snag one of these guys late and just sit there w/ them like a fat cat.
5.) Finally, I make this recommendation every year, and this year's no different: I personally will be making my appearance at my Fantasy Football draft with an Antonio Gates jersey on. 8-5, GATES, BABY! F'real though, he's still good, still has his QB, and might actually do everything w/ healthy body parts this year.
Ahh, football. Still got me going, after all these years.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
What I've realized (and reiterated time and time again on this blog) is that fantasy football is more a roll of a dice, a shot in the dark, a prayer that your #1 RB won't blow out his MCL in Week 2. Thing happen week to week, guys are picked up from off the street by teams (mostly by Denver) and made into the feature back, guys you haven't even heard of sub in and toss up 4-TD games....it's crazy, but I still love it.
Here are my gut feelings/ analytically-supported findings (with the VERY STRONG precaution that I'm not responsible for them):
1.) DeAngelo Williams fits my "don't draft immediately after he's had his career year" criterion, but what I'm more worried about is how much playing time he gets w/ Jonathan Stewart there, and if there's any question about that, he shouldn't be your #1 RB. Avoid.
2.) Ronnie Brown: Picking the best player is so crucial in fantasy football, I know plenty of years where someone's invested on a player "in the best situation" and then found the guy playing themselves out of position cuz they didn't have the skills to start with. Folks, Ronnie Brown has the skills. And he's only 27.
3.) Peyton Manning: Am I missing something here? He had 4 less TD's last year and people calling it the apocalypse, never mind the guaranteed 4000 yards and eliteness. If you're drafti this guy after Dwayne Bowe, Pierre Thomas, or Aaron Rodgers!!!!?????, you're kidding yourself.
4.) Every year I'm reminded that football is a young man's sport, especially at the RB position. (Last year, Matt Forte KILLED me). I'd say it's like casting cute kids for toothpaste commericals, the younger the better. That's why Ray Rice comes to mind, Knowshon Moreno is enticing, and Donald Brown seems like one Addai injury away from stardom. I'd say snag one of these guys late and just sit there w/ them like a fat cat.
5.) Finally, I make this recommendation every year, and this year's no different: I personally will be making my appearance at my Fantasy Football draft with an Antonio Gates jersey on. 8-5, GATES, BABY! F'real though, he's still good, still has his QB, and might actually do everything w/ healthy body parts this year.
Ahh, football. Still got me going, after all these years.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Friday, August 28, 2009
Kendry!
One of the best things this sumer for me has got to be one Kendry Morales, who has just gone bonkers replacing Mark Teixeria in Anaheim. I change the channel from BB After Dark to Fox Sports, and on the first pitch I see (an 0-2 submarine from Brad Ziegler) Kendry hits a 3-run jack to cap a 2-HR night, propelling my fantasy team to a much-needed margin in the weekly matchup. Love this guy. Compare these 2 stat lines:
.306, 29 HR's, 69 R's, 90 RBI's
.295, 29 HR's, 80 R's, 96 RBI's
.286, 31 HR's, 78 R's, 97 RBI's........
Which stat line do you prefer? Doesn't matter, right? Pretty much the same? Well, those are the stats (in order) of Morales, Justin Morneau, and Mark Teixeria. The difference? Morales didn't get to start every day, and he didn't require a 2nd-3rd round pick. More like a 20th round. Awesomeness personified, this guy. Savior comes to mind: don't know where I'd be w/o him. And this guy's batting 6th in the Angels lineup? Looks like their best hitter to me.
Other summer man-crushes:
Randy Wolf: Proof that baseball allows for renaissance seasons. Only complaint is the meager win total, but not his fault. Has been money down the stretch, especially for a guy who's 33.
Joe Blanton/ Jonathan Sanchez/ Jorge De La Rosa: proof that my "take starting-pitchers-last or even just straight off the waiver wire strategy" works. These guys were all available mid-season despite being high-K guys on winning teams, I snatched them up and enjoyed the ride. Props to Sanchez for a perfect game, props to the Aztec Warrior for three multi-digit K games. Keep it up guys, you have my undying love.
Chris Coghlan: Where'd this guy come from? Overtook Brandon Phillips in my book, he's eager to prove himself so he can get traded out of Florida to a real major-league team. Excited: He definitely can hit, this guy, even if his name sounds like one of a certain big-boned pitcher called Bartolo.......
Big Brother update:
Have been absolutely addicted to this season, have watched every episode and even get bored in the episodes from having already seen something through BB AfterDark. Having Showtime is gonna ruin me.......
I have similar views w/ BB8's Eric Stein, who posts weekly thoughts on the houseguests here:
http://www.realitywanted.com/newsitem/2259-eric-stein-sizes-up-the-big-brother-11-houseguests-week-7
I still want Michelle to win cuz like she herself claimed, she resembles Eric's gameplay in many respects, with all the floating ingredients needed for a sustained stay in the house, not as much pull as Eric except she's actually a better competitor than Eric and can win the House-related questions in the game. Needs to survive this week, though, cuz Jeff and Jordan inexplicably have turned on her and now trust Kevin and Nat.
Here's my take on Jeff: my friend absolutely hates him now because he's sort of let the power rush to his head (as has happened many times in BB history), but I'm just disappointed in him. Not very strategic, this guy, taking out Russell who at the very least has been with him for weeks on end, Jeff turning on him simply because "word got around" to him from the self-preserving mouths of Natalie and Kevin that Russell wants to target him. OF COURSE Russel wants to get close to Michele, Jeff, you and Jordan are attached at the hip, what's wrong w/ having a final 2 deal? You just want everyone else to not talk to each other and try to work together while you're the only person who's allwed to have a definite final 2? It just doesn't make sense to jump Final 4 alliances because you're not improving yourself, the alliance is only still gonna get you down to the final 4 people, PLUS the fact kevin and nat had more guaranteed votes in the jury house already, so they're more likely to win. I buy the argument that Russell was the biggest threat in the house, but that's again going w/ the "alpha male= threat" argument. If you look at what Russell won vs. what everyone else won, Kevin might be more dangerous, and Michelle is DEFINITELY more dangerous w/ questions, which will definitely encompass the Final four Veto competition, one of the most important in the game, plus 2 of three games in the Final HoH. The only way to justify axing Russell was for personal reasons, and that's no way to win Big Brother.
Plus, I'm disappointed in Jeff because he fell for Natalie's little ploy. I HATE Natalie, always have, always will. First of all, there's been at least 3 Natalie's now in BB history, WAY too much for one first name. Whereas i still like Jeff (and I'm sure most of America still does, hotness gets you a long way in life), I'm disappointed in him. This disappointment is NOTHING compared to hating Natalie and her gameplay. I just want to scream at the screen for everybody else in the house to compare notes and expose Natalie's lies (she's even lied about what Kevin's doing), and she's gone. But admittedly, she's been going on a Dr. Will route and convinced everyone else of everything. If only a smart, dedicated, fun-loving, competition-ready, student-of-BB like myself were in the house to out this girl ( instead of the nothing that is Jordan, which from thi
Btw, I relish in the fact that Lydia won no competitions during her time at BB, as predicted (if you don't count the ridiculous Unitard she won for herself.) So far, BB has somehow made it so that all wearers (4) of the red unitard have been women. They're due for a guy to fall into it......(it'll be just my luck if i go in the house and get it. But, I'd gladly wear it the whole time if they told me I could be in the house......)
Ahh, the sacrifices we make. To get a better education and a professional degree (and hopefully a well-paying job after all of it), I went to law school and took on tens of thousands of dollars in debt. Let's hope it pays off.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
.306, 29 HR's, 69 R's, 90 RBI's
.295, 29 HR's, 80 R's, 96 RBI's
.286, 31 HR's, 78 R's, 97 RBI's........
Which stat line do you prefer? Doesn't matter, right? Pretty much the same? Well, those are the stats (in order) of Morales, Justin Morneau, and Mark Teixeria. The difference? Morales didn't get to start every day, and he didn't require a 2nd-3rd round pick. More like a 20th round. Awesomeness personified, this guy. Savior comes to mind: don't know where I'd be w/o him. And this guy's batting 6th in the Angels lineup? Looks like their best hitter to me.
Other summer man-crushes:
Randy Wolf: Proof that baseball allows for renaissance seasons. Only complaint is the meager win total, but not his fault. Has been money down the stretch, especially for a guy who's 33.
Joe Blanton/ Jonathan Sanchez/ Jorge De La Rosa: proof that my "take starting-pitchers-last or even just straight off the waiver wire strategy" works. These guys were all available mid-season despite being high-K guys on winning teams, I snatched them up and enjoyed the ride. Props to Sanchez for a perfect game, props to the Aztec Warrior for three multi-digit K games. Keep it up guys, you have my undying love.
Chris Coghlan: Where'd this guy come from? Overtook Brandon Phillips in my book, he's eager to prove himself so he can get traded out of Florida to a real major-league team. Excited: He definitely can hit, this guy, even if his name sounds like one of a certain big-boned pitcher called Bartolo.......
Big Brother update:
Have been absolutely addicted to this season, have watched every episode and even get bored in the episodes from having already seen something through BB AfterDark. Having Showtime is gonna ruin me.......
I have similar views w/ BB8's Eric Stein, who posts weekly thoughts on the houseguests here:
http://www.realitywanted.com/newsitem/2259-eric-stein-sizes-up-the-big-brother-11-houseguests-week-7
I still want Michelle to win cuz like she herself claimed, she resembles Eric's gameplay in many respects, with all the floating ingredients needed for a sustained stay in the house, not as much pull as Eric except she's actually a better competitor than Eric and can win the House-related questions in the game. Needs to survive this week, though, cuz Jeff and Jordan inexplicably have turned on her and now trust Kevin and Nat.
Here's my take on Jeff: my friend absolutely hates him now because he's sort of let the power rush to his head (as has happened many times in BB history), but I'm just disappointed in him. Not very strategic, this guy, taking out Russell who at the very least has been with him for weeks on end, Jeff turning on him simply because "word got around" to him from the self-preserving mouths of Natalie and Kevin that Russell wants to target him. OF COURSE Russel wants to get close to Michele, Jeff, you and Jordan are attached at the hip, what's wrong w/ having a final 2 deal? You just want everyone else to not talk to each other and try to work together while you're the only person who's allwed to have a definite final 2? It just doesn't make sense to jump Final 4 alliances because you're not improving yourself, the alliance is only still gonna get you down to the final 4 people, PLUS the fact kevin and nat had more guaranteed votes in the jury house already, so they're more likely to win. I buy the argument that Russell was the biggest threat in the house, but that's again going w/ the "alpha male= threat" argument. If you look at what Russell won vs. what everyone else won, Kevin might be more dangerous, and Michelle is DEFINITELY more dangerous w/ questions, which will definitely encompass the Final four Veto competition, one of the most important in the game, plus 2 of three games in the Final HoH. The only way to justify axing Russell was for personal reasons, and that's no way to win Big Brother.
Plus, I'm disappointed in Jeff because he fell for Natalie's little ploy. I HATE Natalie, always have, always will. First of all, there's been at least 3 Natalie's now in BB history, WAY too much for one first name. Whereas i still like Jeff (and I'm sure most of America still does, hotness gets you a long way in life), I'm disappointed in him. This disappointment is NOTHING compared to hating Natalie and her gameplay. I just want to scream at the screen for everybody else in the house to compare notes and expose Natalie's lies (she's even lied about what Kevin's doing), and she's gone. But admittedly, she's been going on a Dr. Will route and convinced everyone else of everything. If only a smart, dedicated, fun-loving, competition-ready, student-of-BB like myself were in the house to out this girl ( instead of the nothing that is Jordan, which from thi
Btw, I relish in the fact that Lydia won no competitions during her time at BB, as predicted (if you don't count the ridiculous Unitard she won for herself.) So far, BB has somehow made it so that all wearers (4) of the red unitard have been women. They're due for a guy to fall into it......(it'll be just my luck if i go in the house and get it. But, I'd gladly wear it the whole time if they told me I could be in the house......)
Ahh, the sacrifices we make. To get a better education and a professional degree (and hopefully a well-paying job after all of it), I went to law school and took on tens of thousands of dollars in debt. Let's hope it pays off.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Life Update + Note to future self
If there's one good main thing I've learned about this blog, it's that it's good to keep up w/it as a time capsule so as to rehash the experiences in real-time and remember all the emotions I'm going through right now.
So to my 20-years-in-the-future self: Just went to my man Shouvik's wedding, was really pretty impressive, had a really fun night, hopefully u invited him to your own wedding. I'm working at Sun Learning Center right now to gain some extra cash, but also it reminds me again why I loved being a camp counselor: helping kids have a great time, see them make friends, discover themselves, learn to overcome challenges, and just generally grow up. It's a tough world out there and you get one chance at childhood: I'm just there to ease them through it.
Found an apartment in the Palms for the semester. Big regret was not to haggle on price: don't know how much we would have gotten deduced, but wouldn't have hurt to try. Hopefully you'll have perfected the art of negotiation in 20 years.
Current mood about my career: anxious. The OCI/ summer associate interviewing season is crucial, and I'm in a tough spot due to the economy and mediocre grades. I am doing a good job trying to find parachutes as OCI chances could yield zero offers, in which case I gotta be really creative. Hopefully in 20 years you'll look back at the worries of 2009 and laugh at the triviality of them, but without securing my future I am antsy at best about the many thousands in debt I will be in after law school and getting my legal career off the ground.
The feeling for the last month has been OBSESSIVE over Big Brother: never have I fallen for this show like this season. Watching all the CBS episodes, reading Past Houseguest columns (Eric STein), and watching hours of BB AfterDark on Showtime every night: signs of an addiction. Hardest part is knowing I applied and was asked by a very short email to go to the casting call, but didn't go for a variety of reasons......always will be a "What if?"....Also, might have been golden window w/ the Cliques, they actually wanted nerds like me. I hope my 20-yrs-later self can look back at 2009 as just another season that I honed my Big Brother skills before finally going into the house, dominating the season, starring in BB All-stars 2, and becoming one of the most famous reality TV players ever. Showmance optional.
Prediction about economy: will be all good by 2011. Hopefully not dead wrong about this, but things happen fast: less than a year ago the economy tanked and all hell broke loose, probably will take longer to sew it back up but not that long.
Also, in 20 years you'll be 42, probably past the midway point of your life......reminds the current self of the mortality of human beings. My 94-year-old grandmother just passed away this summer, and I'm a little bothered on the inside of it. She took care of me in China for my first 4.5 years, sent me to kindergarten and did the babysitting bit, raised me to have some character. Life motto: "It's not easy to make it in this world." True, true. Makes me wonder about life after death, the enormity of infinity and insignificance + fragility of my own life. My worst fear: After life, nothingness. Til eternity, so much so that it's like I never lived. Urg, morbid feelings just thinking about it.
On a brighter note, totally revived my all-year roto fantasy baseball league and seems locked into a 2nd-place finish. Starting staff of Halladay and Verlander ( woulda preferred Halladay to the Angels, Dodgers, of Phils for the wins), but still awesome, and lineup is downright scary and would take me to the top if I didn't destroy my BA early in the season ( VMart, Reynolds, Cano, Ramirez, Rollins, Markakis, Soriano, Willingham, Rios). Amassed quite the team this season, but trading Bobby Abreu twice (in both my leagues) is making me feel quite donkey-like.
Time to research for firms. Remind self to be jubilant when (IF) i get that first offer for a full-time position. A.K.A., a J-O-B!!!! I want it!!!!
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
So to my 20-years-in-the-future self: Just went to my man Shouvik's wedding, was really pretty impressive, had a really fun night, hopefully u invited him to your own wedding. I'm working at Sun Learning Center right now to gain some extra cash, but also it reminds me again why I loved being a camp counselor: helping kids have a great time, see them make friends, discover themselves, learn to overcome challenges, and just generally grow up. It's a tough world out there and you get one chance at childhood: I'm just there to ease them through it.
Found an apartment in the Palms for the semester. Big regret was not to haggle on price: don't know how much we would have gotten deduced, but wouldn't have hurt to try. Hopefully you'll have perfected the art of negotiation in 20 years.
Current mood about my career: anxious. The OCI/ summer associate interviewing season is crucial, and I'm in a tough spot due to the economy and mediocre grades. I am doing a good job trying to find parachutes as OCI chances could yield zero offers, in which case I gotta be really creative. Hopefully in 20 years you'll look back at the worries of 2009 and laugh at the triviality of them, but without securing my future I am antsy at best about the many thousands in debt I will be in after law school and getting my legal career off the ground.
The feeling for the last month has been OBSESSIVE over Big Brother: never have I fallen for this show like this season. Watching all the CBS episodes, reading Past Houseguest columns (Eric STein), and watching hours of BB AfterDark on Showtime every night: signs of an addiction. Hardest part is knowing I applied and was asked by a very short email to go to the casting call, but didn't go for a variety of reasons......always will be a "What if?"....Also, might have been golden window w/ the Cliques, they actually wanted nerds like me. I hope my 20-yrs-later self can look back at 2009 as just another season that I honed my Big Brother skills before finally going into the house, dominating the season, starring in BB All-stars 2, and becoming one of the most famous reality TV players ever. Showmance optional.
Prediction about economy: will be all good by 2011. Hopefully not dead wrong about this, but things happen fast: less than a year ago the economy tanked and all hell broke loose, probably will take longer to sew it back up but not that long.
Also, in 20 years you'll be 42, probably past the midway point of your life......reminds the current self of the mortality of human beings. My 94-year-old grandmother just passed away this summer, and I'm a little bothered on the inside of it. She took care of me in China for my first 4.5 years, sent me to kindergarten and did the babysitting bit, raised me to have some character. Life motto: "It's not easy to make it in this world." True, true. Makes me wonder about life after death, the enormity of infinity and insignificance + fragility of my own life. My worst fear: After life, nothingness. Til eternity, so much so that it's like I never lived. Urg, morbid feelings just thinking about it.
On a brighter note, totally revived my all-year roto fantasy baseball league and seems locked into a 2nd-place finish. Starting staff of Halladay and Verlander ( woulda preferred Halladay to the Angels, Dodgers, of Phils for the wins), but still awesome, and lineup is downright scary and would take me to the top if I didn't destroy my BA early in the season ( VMart, Reynolds, Cano, Ramirez, Rollins, Markakis, Soriano, Willingham, Rios). Amassed quite the team this season, but trading Bobby Abreu twice (in both my leagues) is making me feel quite donkey-like.
Time to research for firms. Remind self to be jubilant when (IF) i get that first offer for a full-time position. A.K.A., a J-O-B!!!! I want it!!!!
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
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