What were you doing in eighth grade?

As part of this special early-February weekend blogging binge on the spelling bee, this post is somewhat of a mix between 2 of my fav things: fantasy sports and spelling bees.

So we all remember what eighth grade was like: For some of us, it happened not too long ago and we have vivid memories of what occurred. For others, we age and we forget. But I believe everyone can at least recall some sights, sounds, smells, and emotions of their time in eighth grade and live back on it, whether it's the feel of the wintry breeze on your face in a snowball fight, the pounding of a teacher's ruler on your desk, the smell of bad cafeteria food wafting into your classroom before lunch, or the butterflies you get in your stomach upon deciding the girl two lockers down is worthy of puppy love. Lemme share mine: In eight grade, I was reading Brian Jacques books, almost the whole series, from Matthias, to the Bellmaker, to the Long Patrol. All very good. I was going to high school in the morning for some math classes, I thought I was a badass for being able to swear profusely, but was also just getting to understand what maturity was all about, I graduated from junior high NOT the valedictorian (that went to Katie Sulkowski) in what was soon to be a series of setbacks, I was continuing my nascent chess career that would continue into high school, I played violin without passion and with the motivation of satisfying my parents, and I liked to watch episodes of Beast Wars and Home Improvement before and after I got home. O, and I didn't know how to drive yet. Wow, that must have been tough.

The following are what I think certain people did when they were in eighth grade and what they do now, or vice versa (you'll see).

Lebron James then: Lebron probably was just as studly as he was now, playing b-ball with the big boys, throwing down monster dunks, being an athletic freak. His parents probably called him "the king," he liked to go outside in the wintertime, scoop up some snow in both hands, and throw them in the air with arms outstretched, understanding that some short years later he would be make that his signature move in the NBA.

Josh Smith then: Josh Smith was the human eraser. On any tests or homework assignments, he liked to scribble something on his paper just to furiously erase it, so emphatically in fact that he would gain a lot of attention from his peers. The one thing that really got people's attention, though, was when he reached over to OTHER people's papers and started erasing as well. Just when those people thought that they had written something good, Josh Smith would come over and destroy their work. He would do this all smoothly
Josh Smith now: J-Smoove does the same thing he did in the NBA, except with basketballs, and he does it w/ pazzaz.

Anurag Kashyap then: In 2005 as an eighth-grader, Anurag Kashyap won the National Spelling Bee and became one of the more legendary winners ever, becoming a main character in James Maguire's spelling bee book, getting on the ESPY awards and doing a skit with Matthew Perry a la friends, and doing it with style when girls screamed for him on his last word, he hugged his dad in tears, and in one of the longest championship rounds at the National Spelling Bee ever.
Anurag Kashyap now: A mere 3.5 years later, Anurag, as a senior in high school, competed and won the Jeopardy! Teen Tournament, hosted by Alec Trebek. His last question in final Jeopoardy didn't even matter, as he had double the points of any of his closest competitors, further proving that this guy is a beast. What's next for him? Hosting his own news network? First man on Neptune? Men's Magazine cover? Our next President? Sheesh.

Barry Bonds now: Being indicted for perjury, may go to jail for lying about use of steroids
Barry Bonds then: started creeping into his parents' medicine cabinet, found some weird-looking needles, got curious......

Michael Phelps now: Most well-known Olympic athlete in the country, reputation tarnished by pictures of him doing a bong.
Michael Phelps then: After a long day of practice in the pool, young Michael meets up with his friends after school, they get bored, they know of one "Doug Wheeler" across the street who may have some mind-altering substances......

Matthew Evans now: In 2008 National Spelling bee, came back for a fifth-straight year and didn't win, but became famous for lugging around a laptop with about 30,000 words:
Matthew Evans later: In 2020, Matthew Evans becomes first person from New Mexico to ever do something...........He creates new Evans' New Dictionary, filled with cool new words nobody's ever heard of.

Samir Patel now: Possibly most famous spelling bee contestant ever, definitely the best contestant ever not to win. Very entertaining, fist-pumping, knuckle-cracking young man always seemed prepared, was ready for a comment, and was made for Tv.
Samir Patel then: In 2015, Samir Patel takes over for Conan O'Brien on NBC's the Late show w/ Samir Patel. His first joke: "Yes, now even your late-night television has been outsourced."

Baron Davis now: Universally recognized as a great point guard with very flashy skills, but posts atrocious FG%'s and turnover numbers.
Baron Davis then: Instead of building things with legos, loved to go out in the neighborhood and accumulate bricks and build things, which really irritated his parents and also other kids who were watching him do this. He also loved apple turnover, cranberry turnover, lost-ball turnover, step-out-of-bounds turnover.........

Richie Sexson now: swing-and-a-miss
Richie Sexson then: swing-and-a-miss

Yao Ming, Tracy McGrady, and Ron Artest now: Tale of the walking wounded
Yao Ming, T-Mac, and Ron-Ron then: Yao steps on earthworm, slips, gum slips out of his pocket, T-Mac comes over and slips on the gum, forcing him to let go of the cotton balls in his hand, hitting Ron Artest squarely in the upper thigh. All out for the season.

Shaquille O'Neal now: In 2007, started show called "Shaq's Big Challenge"
Shaquille O'Neal then: Attended a summer camp called "Camp Big Challenge"

Josephine Kao now: studying hard for another 107 days (That's the subtle countdown that I threw in today) with the support of an awesome, entertaining, can't-miss-a-post blog called Fantasysportguru.
Josephine Kao then: In 2019, ten years after winning the 2009 National Spelling Bee and graduating from (insert awesome college here) University, she remembers what she did in eighth grade.

Fantasize on,
Robert Yan