Another term that doesn't have a great counterpart phrase in Chinese that rolls off the tongue as easily as it does in English like "sibling rivalry," this term showed up in a Daily Double clue in Jeopardy recently as a psychological term, describing what the theme of Succession was about among the Roy kids (shoutout to Succession that ended its run last year). I've never thought of sibling rivalry as psychological, more of just competitive drive and human nature, although I will admit I don't think I've ever had a sibling rivalry with my much younger sister, so I almost want to have one just to see what it feels like. I guess it's a constant drive to be the parents' favorite child, to get your parents' approval more than your sibling(s?) I never felt that necessary because well, I was 9.5 years older so of course I would have way more accomplishments at the time of life as Emily did, so it never really occurred to me, but I do think my sister lives a little bit under my shadow because my parents expect her to be what I was like..... which, not to brag, I did pretty well in high school, not so much after high school, but yea big shoes to fill. But I never needed my parents' attention that much, I actually kind of wanted less of it, just let me do my own thing, and pick me up when I needed a ride after school, supply meals, pay tuition, etc. I guess I took a lot of these things for granted, but it's not like I thought any deficiencies were due to them not paying as much attention to me as my sister.
I wonder if MJ and I ever become parents, and somehow have more than one child, will we have a favorite child? Probably yes, and I guess parents just don't talk about it, but I guess kids can sense that rivalry.
The earliest sibling rivalry in human history is probably documented in the Bible, the story of Abel and Cain, an example of something I should have known about as an adult but had no idea about until I watched Jeopardy a lot, and now it comes up like every other week. (This past week it was a question about taking one letter out of a pile of stones on a hiking trail and getting a man's name in the Book of Genesis, answer being cairn and Cain. I couldn't for the life of me remember "cairn" and 5 seconds is not enough time to think of all the male members in Genesis, but usually it's either Adam, Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Ishmael, Jacob, Esau, so on and so on. Cain is not the go-to, but for Jeopardy purposes he probably is because that story of his rivalry with Abel and eventually killing him is so compelling, so juicy, and so....human, so typical of jealousy and greed and trying to get approval from one's parents, except the parent in this case is God. Cain kills Abel because God shows favoritism towards Abel apparently, probably a good lesson for parents with multiple kids to be equal and treat each kid with special care and without favoritism.
Most siblings I've met are all on good terms, either hanging out or speaking favorably of their siblings. I do know a few, though, who don't get along with their brothers or sisters and don't speak to them. That's tough, because unlike parents or grandparents, or sons or daughters, siblings are likely the ones who will be with you the longest, from birth to death, since they're always around your same age. They're always around, and they're of the same generation, likely with some of the same genes, same mindset, etc. To be estranged or not talk to a sibling for a long time or forever (or in Cain's case, killing them) seems awfully harsh, with exceptinos of murders like Ted Kacynski (his brother turned him in) of course. For most people, it's probably just a matter of not seeing eye to eye on something, some argument that got out of hand. I do hope everyone is able to turn sibling rivalries as a kid into sibling friendships, I'm curious what that's like.
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