Sunday, January 1, 2023

Home Alone (独自在家, 一人で家に帰る, 혼자 집에)

 I feel like I've posted about this topic before because the Japanese, Chinese, and Korean all seem familiar, but that's kind of the point of the post: Ever since the pandemic started I've found myself alone at home quite often and for large quantities of time: MJ went to nursing school and then started working, leaving me at home in the new WFH environment. So on this New Year's Day I hit up Hulu and could totally relate to the original Home Alone starring Macauley Culkin, who grew up in a huge household in a huge home with 2 parents and 5 or 6 siblings, but then suddenly left at home over the holidays by himself. It's a huge contrast and a lonely feeling, and Home Alone really does a great job making family and tons of family members milling around seem like a great feeling vs. being alone. In other words, great propaganda film for large families and having tons of kids. 

Then I realized, I grew up watching all these American mainstream TV shows/movies like Home Alone 2 (I swear I've seen that movie 20+ times), watched the Cosby show religiously after school, another fictional family with lots of siblings (too bad it never comes up on Jeopardy! because the title guy turned out to be a really bad guy using quaaludes to assault women), Home Improvement (3 boys in the Tim Taylor household), later on Everybody Loves Raymond, etc. etc. Even as a kid I was conditioned to think that it was natural and happy to have a huge family with lots of nephews, aunts, cousins, second cousins, and family reunions/gatherings once in a while where you see all those people. Or maybe as a kid I was subconsciously seeking those shows out, looking for a sense of home when both my parents were working all the time and I was essentially a latchkey kid (if not for my grandpa who kept me company, thank god for him all those years), and Emily my sister wasn't around until I was nine and a half years old. Yup, a shrink would probably tell me I was craving what I didn't have, a big family. But as an adult do I still feel this way? Every holiday season I still have my parents' home to go back to, I see my sister periodically, and I have MJ, and then all of my extended family is off in various areas of the US or back in China. I often go years without seeing them, or even calling them. Is my life better off? I guess I've conditioned myself to be pretty secluded and not needing too many family members in my life, and it doesn't seem like MJ and I are going to have a huge family of our own (likely 1 child if we're likely, 2 tops) and I keep telling myself that this is for the better that I'm not bogged down with having too many family members asking for favors, having to give out beaucoup gifts during the holiday season, write letters, join preparations for parties, etc., and I value my free time anyway and get bored with chitchat and talking about what other people want to talk about. That's all true, but of course there's other parts of me that crave attention, social interaction, cracking jokes, etc., and fantasizes about that ideal family like the Huxtibles (Cosby show) or McAllisters (Home Alone). They all seem so perfect (of course they're not, all happy families are alike, but each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way- Tolstoy) there could be a ton of bad things that run within a dysfunctional family that really make life difficult. I do look around, though, at some of my friends who have at least 3 siblings in their family and they seem to have gotten a leg up on "street sense" and being mature about life where I only learned things like how to talk to girls or how not to be awkward at a very, very late age (think 20+). That, I do think, would have been very different for my development as a kid. 

Then again, being Home Alone isn't all that bad. There are tons of TV shows like Abbott Elementary and "What We do in the Shadows" to brush up on, The Chase is coming back on, and there's a whole world of books from the library I haven't read yet to get 2023 off to a great start. And maybe by the end of the year, we'll add someone to our family that makes me not be home alone anymore! Have a wonderful 2023! (can't be worse than 2022 in the stock market......right?) 

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