I don't write much about individual movies anymore because I'm focusing on the big picture (so many great movies I haven't even heard about much less seen!) and it's really a travesty I haven't done a marathon of all the Alfred Hitchcock movies, or Stanley Kubrick movies, or David Fincher movies.....but what can I say, a good romantic comedy will suck me in every time. And Love Hard isn't just any romantic movie, it's one with an Asian American man as the lead (Jimmy O. Yang, who is the same age as me, has the same background immigrating to the U.S. from China/Hong Kong, and more importantly looks like me. I didn't really understand when black people say they needed to someone like Obama become president to realize it's possible or to feel represented, but Jimmy O. Yang kind of does that for me, a nerdy-look Asian guy making it as one of the lead actors in a non-kung fu/ martial arts movie, and not just cast as the nerdy guy. Although, he kind of is in the movie at first).
Love Hard is so relatable for anyone who has ever done online dating (as I did before I met MJ) because you can sift through profiles, send out short messages to people you like, but you don't really KNOW until you meet in person, and that's what the movie is built on. I retired from online dating years ago, but suddenly the movie brought all the memories back of the awkwardness, the shallowness of rating people based on an online profile (but mainly just people's photos, which is about 80% of the calculus). I'm happy to say that I never got catfished by someone who was completely pretending to be someone she wasn't, but definitely there were some embellishments of photos and picking photos with the right lighting that you only realized until you met the person. I also like to think I was rather honest in my own profile, but of course like anyone else I filtered the photos to only the "good ones" and definitely do a bathroom selfie or make myself look like an axe murderer.
The movie was a win for me in terms of presenting Asian Americans in a positive light and presenting the downsides of glorifying beautiful-looking people in that less beautiful-looking and unpopular people like me and Jimmy O. Yang get ignored, as well as the depressing reality of getting rejected over and over again in a game that only values great cards, but finding myself repeatedly being dealt a bad hand. I appreciated the movie's messages and the effort to make a happy ending for Jimmy O. Yang and the female lead at the end, but let's be honest: in reality the attractive young lady from Los Angeles with an online writer's job is NOT going to move to Lake Placid, New York to start a life with an Asian American glasses-wearing guy who still lives in the basement of his parents' house where he grew up in, works at the sporting goods store for his dad, and apparently hasn't had a girlfriend before. That's just not a good match, and no matter how funny and insightful and inspiring Jimmy O. Yang can be that girl isn't going to stick around for long. Forget all the "soft factors," just the attractiveness factor is going to be the downfall. Unfortunatley in this society we are judged by how we look, and the girl i goisng to be judged by how her bf/ future husband looks, and eventually that would wear down the relationship, from what her parents think and what her friends think. They say Love conquers all, but in the dating world unfortunately beauty conquers all. The harsh reality that as much as the message of Love Hard to not judge someone by an online dating profile is commendable and praiseworthy, when it comes to our own lives we'll still pick the beauty/attractiveness because it's a reflection on ourselves as well (it's kind of like the liberals who want better conditions for the homeless and more affordable housing, as long as they don't build it in THEIR neighborhood). I'm guilty of the same; I used to judge mostly by physical attractiveness and not necessarily at first by compatibility, because as much as I got judged by those, I knew how important it was as a criteria and put that first. It's just a matter-of-fact thing that's a heartbreaking but true part of our world. Love Hard is a good, funny movie and I like many parts of it, but the big underlying theme still rings hollow to me as unrealistic.
No comments:
Post a Comment