In Chinese, there are different words for a cousins and relatives from different sides of the family (mom's side or father's side), and its all very complicated, but I believe Japanese and Korean has simplified by making all of them the same name. Yay for simplification!
For the first time in 3 years, my niece from China visited me, and while I was impressed with her ability to speak so well, know English, do math, know how to ice skate, etc., I gotta say that she wasn't THAT much different from October 2015 when she came last. Fun fact, apparently: kids don't age that much from age 4 to 7. HUGE change from newborn to 1 year old, HUGE change from 8 years old to 11 years old I think (puberty starts to hit, etc.), but 4 to 7, face still looks the same, biggest change is probably teeth changing and brain growing. Physical appearance though: still got their baby smiles so that parents can enjoy it for awhile before......gasp.........the TEENAGE years. (Oh my god, looking back at the horror of those years).
Just as kids can't choose their parents (a fact I was keenly aware of back when I was a rebellious teenager and felt that way), parents can't choose their children. I never considered that when I was a kid; I guess I assumed that parents knew what they were getting into and could predict the qualities and almost exactly what the kid would look like if they decided to have a child. The truth is, parents probably don't have that much control. People are on different sides of the debate about nature v. nurture, I'm predictably kind of moderate in between and I believe it's a combination, but I do believe the basic package you get as a kid is based on nature. Whether it's a healthy baby, how the baby looks, and even some personality factors (short temper, cries a lot, LOW energy) are kind of just luck, not what the parent can control through raising the baby, good parenting, etc. Well, I guess the parent can control selectively one half of the genes of the baby (by selecting a good partner), but that's probably out of one's hands after the baby is born. It is kind of a big gamble to have a child and hope that the kid turns out OK no matter how good or successful or attractive the parents are,
My cousin and her husband definitely got lucky. My niece is well-behaved and listens to directions yet seems smart and has a very bright smile and laughs a lot. Really heart-warming kid that brightens up a whole family and I'm sure makes the grandparents (and even the great-grandparent, my grandpa) feel young again. Truly a blessing. I also understand why people adore nieces and nephews so much now (especially when they're in the golden ages 4-10). They look cute, do funny things, think everything adults do is awesome, look up to parents, make adults feel important that they're teaching them things, and best of all, they're not MY kids, so if I get tired of the whole playing with kids thing I can drop them off to their real parents who have no choice but to take them back. A great deal, it is, to be Uncle Robert.
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