To live (살다) (生きる) 活着

Once in a while between the mountain of movies you're thrown at by the media like Avengers, the latest Disney movie (Coco was actually a really good movie so it's an exception) I see one that inspires me, changes the way I view the world. The 1994 movie "To Live" (活着) is one of those movies. Background: a historical look at a family's life from 1940 on, it's modeled like "Forest Gump" in that it reflects the historical background of the country back then, except instead of the U.S. it's China. You think the 1900's was tough on the U.S. with 2 world wars and civil rights and political movements, it's child's play compared to the brutality of China during the 1900's. I didn't live through that and wasn't taught that as a child, so it's rather eye-opening. Oh and the Chinese government censored "To Live" due to its portrayal of the Communist party (what else is new?) so I hadn't heard about it until now, but it is stunningly well done. 

The lesson from "To Live," without giving away anything, is that life is tough. In the whole history of the Earth, the last few decades (or around the time I've lived) has probably been some of the most prosperous and easy on certain populations of the world. Sure, there are still third world developing countries that haven't experienced that, and there's still war and people dying every day, but in some societies life is greatly enhanced by medical advances, technology, and knowledge. We are, by comparison to 100 years of human history ago, SO SO SO much more well-off and lucky. (It's very possible in the miracle of me being able to live on this world that I would have been born much sooner and in a totally different world, without waking up to sunlight and good weather, without being able to use a computer, check my phone, see my family a lot of the time, have running water, etc., etc.) Chinese people have this idea of "just living," kind of like surviving, living life without complaints, don't expect too much. It's born out of environments like those depicted in "To Live," where just living the bare essentials of life (being with one's family) seems like a luxury, that you get sucked into a war and the risk of dying for what seems like no reason (how many wars in the history of the world have been fought for some king's pride or in the name of someone who doesn't care about the soldiers who die as a result?) In the movies that we get to watch over and over in the safety of our homes nowadays ON DEMAND, whenever we want, for however many times we want, the main character always lives, but we see hundreds, thousands of other people dying. Well in real life, those other people who die would most likely be YOU. You don't survive the war, you don't continue living and living out one's life. You just die, that's it. So living the bare essentials of life is treasure enough (forget about dodgeball, fantasy baseball, trips to exotic islands, marijuana stocks, fancy weddings, etc.) Living is enough for the people in "To Live," and that very easily could have been (and still could be me). 

Also, I wished I would have watched the movie before college because a big theme is "Don't gamble," so much so that the main hero of the story gambled so much that his wife named their son "Don't gamble" to make sure that he didn't. Gambling is a terrible waste of time and I regret doing it when I was younger, it's super addictive and can ruin people just as much as other addictions can. I'm happy that I lost at gambling and never succeeded and got super unlucky at poker/ other gambling because it made me get out of it (I love money more), and it made me realize how lucky I am in other parts of life. Why do I need to win at a random game of chance to prove how good I am or that I can make money? I can do that in other ways. 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan