Cutting Nails (つめきり)

Nails, nails, nails everywhere. Ever since we moved in to our apartment together, MJ finds special "surprises" from time to time in the house, to magical stains on the seat cushions, to loose hairs in the bathtub (I'm starting to lose head hair, oh no! The beginning of hair loss), to spots I missed in the dishes I just washed (she's earned the nickname "Quality Control" for her efforts), but the thing she gets grossed out the most about are nails. MJ gets VERY UPSET about loose nails that I trimmed but went flying out of range of the cover I used.

 It's the weirdest thing: these nails look perfectly stable when I start cutting them but they're like self-destructing devices that detonate upon detachment from the mothership, and they have a mind of their own: they don't follow a distinct pattern of flight, just go everywhere in the apartment. Our apartment floor is gray and the walls are white and the nails are (for the most part) white, so the detached nails are harder to find than me in a Shanghai subway. They always reappear at the worst time though, MJ will gasp, reach for something small in a corner (WAY far away from where I originally cut my nails) and I'll know I'm in trouble. And don't get me started on toenails, those things are like bigger, stronger brothers of the fingernails. I've conceived of some cockamamie schemes to track the nails such as painting the nails a different color (rainbow), etc. to find them easily, enclose myself in a small room with no openings to enclose the nails, etc. They just have a mind of their own.

I do like cutting nails, however, because they're an easy way to change one's mood a bit, a common theme in Asian cultures, apparently, except they usually get a haircut, or do a big clean-up effort, etc. (much more productive). it's called 気分てんかん, Kibuntenkan, and cutting nails does help........I get a fresh cut feeling when I touch things, or when I run I can feel the freshly cut nails digging into the shoes and feel less weighed down or more free, if only psychologically. If only cutting nails could result in significant weight loss! That would be awesome. 

This summer, I'm really excited about 2 things: 1.) My team's return to the Ultimate Dodgeball Championship (trampoline dodgeball), this year in Chicago (cue "I'm Coming Home" music and Lebron-like highlight montage) where we will fight with 31 other teams for a chance to ascend to the throne of the dodgeball world (with ESPN2 coverage along the way, which honestly is more appealing to me than a medal/trophy and cash prizes, although cash prizes would be nice the way wedding costs pile up) and 2.) the less realistic, but much more intense, battle for the throne on the hit series Game of Thrones, where the end is coming soon. How fitting would it be for August 6, the Sunday of the Championship, to be the same day as Daenerys Targaryen finally ascends to her rightful place atop the Iron Throne! Ah one can only dream.