The Year in Headlines

As 2010 draws to a close, DaMan takes an unusual (possibly somewhat humours) look at all the top headlines this year.

1. Alabama wins National Championship: Do NOT remember this happening: I was watching this game drunk off my @$$ in a little bar near Mexico.......don't ask.

2. Haiti earthquake: One of the sadder stories of the year. CNN was all over this. Sports tie-in: Samuel Dalembert is a good guy.

3. Scott Brown elected to Senate, shocking Democrat Martha Coakley: a tiding of things to come for Democrats in 2010.

4. The Edwards separate, Elizabeth Edwards later passes away in December - further solidifying John Edwards' place in the Douchiest Douchebags Hall of Fame.

5. Apple unveils the iPad: Why is Steve Jobs NOT wearing a belt when unveiling it? Did he have to pawn that off to get funding for this gadget?

6. Toyota pedal recall: giving new meaning to Toyota's motto: "Moving Forward"

7. Vancouver Olympics: U.S. wins 37 medals. Wait, there's a WINTER olympics too?

8. Plane flown into IRS building: ironically, news broke while I was sitting in tax class. Professor had no comment.

9. Tiger Woods apologizes: he's sorry he got caught.

10. Dick Cheney heart attack: Being an ex-VP more stressful than being VP.

11. Sea World employee killed by whale....one of sadder stories of the year. Synonymous with the message Steve Irwin left: Nature can be dangerous.

12. Chilean earthquake: lots of natural disasters this year. Let's hope Cali doesn't get the next big quake? (fingers crossed)

13. Jesse James admits infidelity: he's sorry he got caught.

14. Obama signs healthcare into law: saddling the next Prez with more problems in 2014.

15. U.S. Census: o yea......I participated. Was like a 10 minute thing......faster than a McDonalds run.

16. Polish president killed in plane crash......In other news, LOST had its series finale.

17. BP oil well explodes......hasn't Louisiana as a whole suffered enough these past few years?

18. Arizona passes immigration law: Did they really think this law would fly?

19. Britain elects David Cameron as its new Prime Minister......Not as dashing as Tony Blair.

20. Blackhawks win Stanley Cup........now if only we could do something about the Cubs....

21. Russian spies arrested........yes, it was criminal how hot the red head Anna Chapman was.

22. Lindsay Lohan sentenced: Dude, Lindsay, can we time-warp back 12 years and try that teenage/adolesence thing again?

23. Mel Gibson audio tapes releases (threatens ex-girlfriend): Mel, that's NOT what woman want.