The Joys of Traveling Light

Sitting in the Queen City of Charlotte, North Carolina, I’m reminded of my personal philosophy on traveling: Traveling light, eating light (don’t eat at the airport). My best experiences when traveling when I just have my laptop with me, nothing else (luckily, I have 2 homes with 2 sets of cloth between my own place with MJ and my parents’ place). I often wince watching people with their carry-on bag and a second “personal item” trying to cram in through the center aisle of the airplane and then trying to defy the laws of physics by cramming them all into the holders. There’s a 100%, without fail, announcement of every single flight I get on where the airline representative asks people to volunteer to check their bag……there’s just literally not enough space on flights. Walking through the airport is also so much more liberating with just a laptop bag: you don’t have to roll a bag and carry the other, don’t have to figure out where to put your luggage when using the restroom, don’ have to take up extra space in the waiting area taking up seats.

Speaking of Halloween, I’m considering dressing up as the scariest things I can think of this year: TSA Agents. I’ve always had a love-hate relationship with TSA agents and it’s never like a friendly relationship with them, most times I just try to keep my head down, do as they say and get through as quickly as possible without altercation, but this year has seen a particularly tumultuous relationship between Robert and TSA Agents of America. Just this morning I had gotten through the long line to get to the ticket check (apparently the busiest times at airports are around 4:30AM-5:30AM Monday mornings, while the rest of the world sleeps travelers have to get started early, I guess), I had safely put my hands up and swiped through, and the only thing keeping me from daylight was getting my bags…. And then like a slow motion horror movie (emphasis on slow), a friendly neighborhood TSA agent stopped for a “random check” of my bag despite me having the same contents every single time I fly through, twice a week, through airports. When I mentioned I had to get to my flight which closed its doors in 5 minutes, there was no apology, no sympathy shown, just a curt, “Don’t give me that, it’s not our fault you were late.” Thanks, TSA, for your concern. The position strikes me as one that appeals to the same demographic as police officers: those who seek to be in a position of authority for even just a brief moment (this is where the backstory of the villain and how they turned into a villain would like start, much like “Breaking Bad” or “Joker.”) and they struggled with authority issues when younger. No accountability, no need to go through any customer service training, no competition to worry about customers going through a different transit authority, they’re just there to be a check between you and bad guys getting on the flight (but, in many more cases, a check between you and getting through security quickly and easily). I’ve often gotten scolded, reprimanded, badgered, ordered, rebuked, and other choice verbs by a security officer who seems befuddled as to why people aren’t already doing what he/she is instructing, even though different airports have different policies as to shoes off/ belts off, etc. It’s gotten to the point where I get tense just going approaching an airport knowing I need to be greeted by a TSA officer, like going to the dentist or going into my boss’s office knowing they have some criticism or harsh order to give me. Why do I subject myself to living through this horror movie over and again? This Halloween, hats off to the very villainous and very scary TSA agents of America.