Often I get asked a very common question when a dinner/ first meeting someone: "What's your favorite food?" My gut instinct in my 20's was to answer, "free food," cuz it's true, anything that's free really tickles my fancy. It's also very difficult to choose between all the thousands and millions of combinations of food out there, with different ethnic backgrounds and including different food groups, to select just ONE favorite out there, it'd be literally comparing apples and oranges, spicy Italian meats to sweet fruit delicacies, there's really no comparison. It's kind of like trying to come up with a favorite movie, or a favorite song. There's just so much out there.
One answer that I've been moving towards from the joking "free food" is "my Mom's cooking." Ofukuro no aji in Japanese. I've always craved my mom's ethnic Chinese home cooking, whether it be "ants going up a tree" 蚂蚁上树, or tofu skins, or Fried Sauce Noodles (炸酱面), aka "Jaja Mian," or just homemade dumplings/ gyoza. (餃子). My Mom can make a whole lot of good food, and I appreciate all of it. It also happens to be pretty "rich" in nutrients, and somewhat oily (MJ would probably call it VERY oily), which caused me to be suffer through some weight issues as a kid. I still haven't to this day found cooking that I would rank over my mother's in terms of sheer reliability of quality and what would be agreeable to my stomach when hungry. Sure, there's equals that are hard to compare (like a five-star restaurant's main course, done with art and pizzazz, but taste wise maybe my taste buds have also favored my mother's cooking. It also helps that my mom is objectively a pretty good cook, as my friends and MJ can attest to when coming over for dinner. It's a great balance actually, my Mom likes to cook food for other people which makes her feel good about herself feeding others, and I like to eat. Perfect combo. Oh and I prefer washing dishes to cooking food, I feel like there's so many cooks and food aficionados out there but not enough dishwashers to match.
I wonder how many people out there prefer Ofukuro no aji over all other meals. I also wonder how many people have mothers who DO NOT cook very well (I feel for them, I really do) and live their childhood not liking their mom's cooking (if their mom was the one who did the cooking, of course: this blog is very aware of societal changes in views towards the woman's role in the family). But maybe they get skinny! Natural weight loss method. Also, how do you tell your mom, or anybody who cooks for you, that their cooking isn't great? It's like the toughest thing to tell somebody, who just went through all the hard work of buying groceries, preparing food, cutting them into pieces, lighting a fire, putting on seasoning/condiments, whatever, trying to make the dish nice, but then you have to break the news to them that their cooking is bad. This kind of scenario is one universal element in all cultures, and Japan/ China/ America all have cultural references to it, putting people in tough positions to either swallow down the ill-tasting food or have to risk offending their friend/ not showing their appreciation. Lying and saying "it's good!" might cause more encouragement of making that specific dish, but being too blunt and saying the food is bad ( 身も蓋もない) might hurt feelings. Personally, I wouldn't be offended if I made the food because I know I'm not a good cook already, but for someone who has aspirations of being a cook/ good food provider, it could be devastating. A compromise is to just offer suggestions, but when everyone else is always saying "oishii!" or "it's good!" even to mediocre food, which seems like the standard nowadays, offering suggestions might already hint to the preparer that you didn't like their food. Sigh.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
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