(残業)

There is a Japanese word

(残業) (zangyou) that I’ll reveal at the end of this entry. Zangyou is a special word that everyone knows the meaning of, but not everyone gets. 

Some people who are offered zangyou don’t take it, and sometimes I wonder if I should refuse it too (don’t worry, it’s not drugs)

When I’m sitting in traffic, I wonder if I could be doing Zangyou. It’s actually a big part of the reason I hate traffic, is I keep hearing the adage “time is money” in my head

When I get home from Zangyou, I’m tired and just want to lie down and go to sleep.

When I should be spending time with my girlfriend, I feel like I’m cheating and spending it with zangyou. (Even though I’d much rather spend it with my girlfriend filling out puzzles!)

When I’m strapped and looking for some cash, I resort to Zangyou. (Hopefully haven’t had to do this for a long time… and again, zangyou is not illegal).

I hate waking up early, but I’ll do if it means I can/have to go to Zangyou.

I should probably exercise once every day, but sometimes I skip it and do Zangyou instead.

Late nights when I’m doing Zangyou, I wonder if I could have predicted 10 years ago during high school, college, etc., that I would be doing this.  Ironically, zangyou kind of feels like staying up to do last minute term papers or study for a big test during my school years.

I eat meals very quickly while at Zangyou, which isn’t what you’re supposed to (my gf says I shouldn’t eat while watching TV or do anything except talking while eating, and detests when I watch TV while eating).

Most sadly, when I’m at zangyou by myself while everyone else seemingly is out in the world doing something and enjoying themselves, I feel true loneliness, like my life is passing me by and I can’t even share it with my family, friends and girlfriend whom I love. It’s paradoxical because I’m partly doing it for them (also doing it for myself to further my own financial wealth, etc.), but by doing it I’m also not getting to be with them. It’s a hard reality of life and adulthood.

Did you figure it out? Zangyou means working overtime (literally, leftover work in Japanese), and I’ve been doing it recently, and probably continuously til the end of the year. It’s when I do Zangyou that you realize how lucky I am to only do 40 hours a week normally and how hard some people actually work to make ends meet, reach their goals, help their family, etc.. I admire them.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan