Earwax (耳くそ)

Today's topics are a little gross, but bear with me, there's a lesson here!

Earwax.... everyone has it, but some have it more than others. I first learned that my ears produce a lot of earwax when I thought my ears were clogged and went to see an ear doctor......the doctor took one look into my ear with his device, smiled, and said I "had a lot of potatoes," and proceeded to dig out a gold mine of ear wax. Apparently the earwax had accumulated so much that they were blocking the listening shaft, a very difficult task according to the ear doctor. Once he had cleared all the earwax, it was like a whole new world for me (literally I could hear Disney's "A Whole New World" song from Aladdin playing and I could hear a lot more than I could before, almost to the extent of being too loud ( my own voice suddenly seemed to be booming and truculent, something that might have affected others without my knowledge for a long time). My car radio which was usually set at 20 seemed to be blasting sound at me, and I had to take it down several notches to like 12. My ear almost felt naked. Then 2 days later the earwax grew back, and I couldn't hear all the nuances anymore. That's how earwax works: it's actually a protective layer like bodyguards to help prevent outside things and even noise, but my ear's bodyguards seemed a little overambitious and believers of Manifest Destiny, taking over my whole ear.

For those who also suffer from this non-fatal but highly embarrassing disease of mass earwax manufacture, I do NOT suggest going to a doctor (easiest 100 bucks + that he ever made, digging out my earwax). A earwax removal kit should do the trick, although my earwax was so firm and numerous and stuck in there that it took numerous attempts for me to do so. My girlfriend (god bless her heart) alieves some of my earwax troubles by digging in with a cue tip, but my ears are different from each other in that the opening to get to the earwax is smaller for the left than the right, so the left ones are left largely unscathed until I have to do a mass cleanup at some point. Suffice it to say, it's not very fun.

The lesson is, get into a good habit or stuff builds up. Just like flossing (apparently I didn't know people should floss once every day!) things don't appear to be a problem right away, but because of the gradual day-by-day buildup, eventually one day you wake up and your ears are clogged because there's so much earwax buildup, or your dentist says you have too much tartar/plaque/ cavities (although anyone reading my blog knows how much I dislike dentists), or you wake up one day really overweight and feeling fat (my worst fear, not noticing that I've been gaining pounds because one doesn't really notice one's own body until it becomes painfully obvious via pictures, other people commenting, etc.

Speaking of unhygenic subjects, there's gotta be some rules implemented in the men's bathroom. I don't know how it works for females (I think they all have their own personal stalls, which helps, but men need to be careful about urinals and um, "overreaching their boundaries." I've stood next to other gentlemen who can't keep the stream controlled and "spill over" the edge of the world, shall we say, and the debris lands somewhere near my foot. There's also splatter and staining of the floor, etc. Men, get your act together. Also, there's the matter of "getting gassy" in the restroom. Sure it's a restroom, but I feel like the common decency is to go into one of the stalls to let the air out of one's tires, rather than subject anyone who uses the restroom to what one had for lunch. And wipe! It's like going into the wild, don't leave anything there that wasn't there before (like your remnants!) Ugh!

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

High Class- 高級(こうきゅう)

I have a prejudice against high-class things: high-class restaurants, high-class hotels, high-class parties, high-class weddings. To me, the term "high-class" just means that the sellers of the product are selling at a high price, and the extra ambiance/ luxury/ feeling of superiority one gets isn't worth it. 

My prejudice all starts with a faulty premise that a big chunk of society (or at least, the consumer world) wants us to believe: anything that's more expensive is worth more to you and is of a better quality. That is just so off. My favorite example is a sushi restaurant where the salmon sushi is $5 but the yellowfin abalone tuna (or some other exotic sounding dish) is $20. That yellowfin whatever is not $20 necessarily because it's necessarily tastier or the texture is better or that one will enjoy it more, there could be a number of reasons it's 4x as expensive as salmon: 1.) it's more rare, so it's harder to obtain, 2.) people like the name so they order it more, driving up the demand, 3.) Yelp experts or so-called connaisseurs liked it and gave it a high rating based on their own set of standards. Personally, my sister, my co-worker, and I all agree: Salmon sashimi is delicious and I'll eat it over any other type of sushi. It just happens also to be one of the cheapest, and I don't need "high-class" salmon sushi, or wild Alaskan caught sushi, I know that when I eat a piece of salmon sashimi that hasn't been sitting out in the sun all day or otherwise has become less edible in anyway, I am getting enough enjoyment. 

I always wonder how people who consume high-class products can afford things. Sure you can drive a high-class car and might have the means to do it, but then there's so many other things that you can "upgrade" to and get the higher-class version of: cell phones, houses, jewelry, hotel rooms (man that can get really expensive if you 're living in a different one every night!) I believe that the whole "high-class" concept is a myth, a pyramid-scheme that exists to get the common person to spend more money, for people with money to feel more superior than people without, that it's an artificial, without much subsance. Sure when I go to a fancy restaurant I feel a little cleaner and the bathrooms are cleaner (although I find it annoying to have bathroom attendants), but I'd much rather go to a normal restaurant, order as many things and a variety of things I haven't tried that doesn't require paying the premium for a high-class experience. 

Perhaps it's my attitude on life that contributes to this prejudie against high class. A lot of times after purchasing an item I'll pride myself on getting something for probably the lowest price that I could find, and getting much utility out of it that's equally as much as I would have gotten from another product (really the same with fantasy baseball players, I like the players who I got on the cheap and compare them to equal production from higher, more brand-name players). Conversely, when I feel like I paid too much for something just because of the name brand of the item or it was sold as the "higher quality" product, I feel cheated and ashamed and wish I could have that extra money back for other, more nobler purposes. 

Maybe I just can't have nice things. 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan 

Underground (地中)

The word underground has various usages and is actually a pretty versatile word, maybe not as versatile as the most versatile word (with the most meanings), found to be "to" or "for," I forget which. Underground even had some cultural significance in the U.S., where slaves during Pre-Civil War times would escape form the South to the North via the Underground Railroad, where one of the many heroes who "conducted" the Underground Railroad was Harriet Tubman, the new face of the American $20 bill, replacing the old Andrew Jackson. Actually pretty significant because I'd wager the 20 dollar bill is one of the most used bills, next to the $1. Rich people have Benjamins, homeless people have the Washingtons, but middle-class people like myself use the Jacksons (now Tubmans, I guess). 

Underground in that context was "secretive," or "illegal," which is understood from the context of being under the ground thus not seen by most people, and "The Underground" is the name of London's subway system, which makes sense because by definition a subway is under ground, but modern society has added more terms: apparently it also means "opposite of mainstream," like an artist producing a work that is done not to achieve commercial success. "Hipster" comes to mind. I appreciate hipsters and their ardent need not to conform to the rest of society, but personally I like most of what the mainstream likes: I like watching TV, working a normal job, going on vacation, having a family one day, all the good things. I don't need to be underground (except when I'm working out, I find that being in the basement level or below is great during the summer because it's naturally cool already). I've always wondered about the paradox that if a hipster is trying to be a hipster by not conforming to the mainstream, isn't that conforming to the idea of a hipster, or what the mainstream perceives are hipster characters, thus conforming to something anyway? Basically to be "underground," one has to come up with something new every time so that nothing becomes mainstream, or else be labeled as too "mainstream," I'd rather be above ground. 

"Going underground," though has a whole different set of definitions, one that has far-reaching implications into the dating world: 1. To be so overloaded with study that one will temporarily discontinue any relationships and/or one's social life in order to find more time 

2. To be so fed up with maintaining relationships that one will stop answering one's phone, email etc and will seem to disappear off the face of the earth.

I've heard of the first definition, not the second. Pretty similar, but for my co-worker who just received a text from her on-off dating "man of her dreams," it was very difficult to take and sent a message of "I'm so fed up." 

Dating and letting the other person know you want to stop seeing them is difficult. It's a balance between being upfront and telling the other person it's over so they can move on with their life (sometimes people don't like the bluntness of this though and cry/ get upset), or just not calling them at all and making them get the hint eventually like it's over (also could make people upset due to the lack of intimacy of it). Sending a text of "I'm going underground" seems a little callous and too convenient in that it is in the middle ground between "hey it's over" and not saying anything at all, but it could also seem like a copout and excuse without telling the other person it's over. These things are never easy, and it varies on the people involved and how long the people have been together, but "going underground" is probably not the right way to phrase it. 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan 

Bookstore (本屋)

This past weekend my girlfriend and I went to the great city of Portland, Oregon (aka Rip City) for a quick 2-day vacation. Unfortunately we didn't go at the optimum time because the city is apparently known for its roses (why one should always check Wikitravel before one goes anywhere!) as May and June are the times the roses bloom, but we did check out the awesome Japanese Garden and International Test Rose Garden in Washington Park. Quite a place, lots of walking and I could feel my lungs breathing in fresh air produced by much healthier-looking green growth than the dried out, choked-out weeds in SoCal.

I've gone to a lot of different cities now, and while it's true that they all start to look similar after awhile (all the airports, all the transportation systems, all the brick apartment complexes, and the request Zoo/ History Museum attachments for the kids), there's a neat twist to a lot of the different features, from the view of the river (Portland had a unique view from the Waterfront Park) and the architecture and surrounding area of the sports arenas. In that regard, Portland's Moda Center, where the Portland TrailBlazers play, has a great view of the downtown city and also has unique fountains that make realistic noises while erupting in different patterns even during the day with no visitors.... quite a dedication to a fan-friendly experience.

VooDoo Doughnuts.... Bacon on Doughnut, 2 of the worst things one can have nutritionally, but 2 of the best things aesthetically, very tempting and satisfying, but I probably won't have that combo ever again.

What will go down as the lasting image for me of Portland, however, is the homage paid to an old art that people overlook nowadays in the modern era of cell phones, data, and social media: bookstore. Portland is home to one of the biggest bookstores in the country, Powell's Books, and it certainly lived up to its reputation (my girlfriend raved about it before the trip and I can see why).....It's divided into several colored rooms (gold room, purple room) etc. to give a feel of a classroom or a fun and happening environment, and literally almost any book one can think of is available, plus games! The whole concept of having to buy a new book at full price is difficult for some consumers nowadays to stomach due to the lack of time, attention deficit disorder that most kids suffer, etc., but buying a used book for half price that someone else has only read once is pretty appealing.....it's still a book, the words haven't changed or anything. For the first time in a long time, I was able to get lost in a bookstore for several hours, staying indoors in a bookstore reading books on a Saturday afternoon/ rolled into night that I didn't regret at all. I went through several books I'd been interested in reading for awhile, like being able to skip into different worlds and different writing styles quickly and arbitrarily, all while feeling the freshness and possibility lying behind the cover of each book. I will admit though, I'm a bit of a sucker for any "New York times bestseller" or "prize winner," etc., but so many books had that designation it was a bit overwhelming and makes one wonder, how does one qualify as a "bestseller?" Something about reading a book in the corner of a bookstore uninterrupted by nature, technology, work (I was thankfully on vacation) is more appealing to me than even spending time outside on a gorgeous day, as that's only one scenery. In the bookstore, I can switch from different worlds and switch to almost any imaginable world I want to, even the real world (nonfiction books plentifully available). It allowed me to harken back to a past time, possibly a simpler time, with less distractions, just me and a book and the characters described therein, where I can enjoy reading about the conflicts and life stories of others without dealing with my own. Thank you, bookstores like Powell's Books, and I hope stores like you are always around.

Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Headache (ずつう - zutsuu - 頭痛)

I have a headache right now. I'm not sure what caused it, I'm not sure how long it will last.


1.) hangover- I'm a special case in that I don't really get hangovers the morning after drinking; I get headaches the night of the drinking. Sure this might be because I "wimp out" early in the night and don't fall asleep drunk, thus getting the hangover early, but I think it might be because the alcohol dissolves before I can get to sleep, causing

Solution: fall asleep, wake up, it's gone.

2.) I get dehydrated- happens after intense exercises, because I've lost a lot of liquid, don't get enough water. Probably what happened today- played dodgeball, didn't get hydrated enough, feeling the effects.

Solution: drink more water at a more timely time (right after the exercise)

3.) Carsick: when I try to read in the passenger seat or worse, in the backseat and the car jerks around a lot, takes a lot of curves and turns, or otherwise stop-and-go traffic.

Solution: always drive yourself so you have no one to blame. Don't read in the car, listen to a podcast. Also, if in the passenger seat, try talking to the driver! He/she probably enjoys the company, and would like you to navigate as well if unsure of destination.

4.) Seasick: the worst kind of headache, accompanied with stomach, nausea, etc.

Solution: : don't go whalewatching or on small boats. Ever.

5.) Getting into arguments: my mom says she gets these all the time, just from getting annoyed by arguing with me. I don't think if there's any scientific proof for these "annoyance" headaches, but I do find that my headaches correlate with getting annoyed and generally irritable especially by other people.
Solution: take a deep breath, improve one's mood.

6.) Being in high places, high altitudes
Solution: Go slow up there, not as much air.

7.) Being otherwise sick: flu, cold, having a fever, especially when having a high temperature.
Solution: Sleep for me cures all.

8.) Slept too long: Sleep is the solution until it isn't and becomes the problem. Especially after afternoon naps, head doesn't know where
Solution: Set an alarm clock for taking a nap, about 10-20 minutes, don't be greedy.


Fantasize on,

Robert Yan

Art Musuem (美術館, びじゅつかん)

My gf (and who I assume is one of the only ones who reads this blog) might have some objection to this, but I've never been a big fan of art museums.

Art exists in many forms, from a small child drawing a loving family picture for their parents or stacking up blocks at the playground in an artistic style, or even playing baseball and flashing some sort of raw skill. I like different types of art, including those depicted in movies and manga animation (a lot of people like those!), and even like the art shown on Magic the Gathering cards and dodgeball T-shirts (the designs are pretty cool!) But I'm not that big of a fan of going around an art gallery and just glancing at the various pieces of art. Here's some things that irk me:


1.) The gallery employees seem REALLY bored all the time. The employees (or ushers, or whatever the people who stand by the art on guard are called) need to be there to prevent people from touching the art and damaging the art (or worse, steal the art) but that's gotta be one of the toughest jobs in the world. Sure the first day might be fun checking out one's own area and maybe adapting to one's room as one's own, but after the crisp new feeling goes away, it'd just seem like torture spending the way without being able to use one's Iphone (might have been bearable back in the day, now in the smartphone age really seems like hell) and being in the atmosphere of an art museum where silence is golden. I almost felt bad for some of the employees and was tempted to strike up a conversation just to break them from their boredom. How does one get that job, by the way? The employees seemed somewhat well educated, or were young enough to be students. Art students who need a part-time job to pay the bills? Seems like a tough life.

2.) Abstract art- I think I've ranted about this before, but abstract art only serves to confuse me, where there is a painting titled "Woman with a guitar" but I don't see a woman or even a guitar. Call me dull or dense but I just have never been able to grasp "true art" I guess. I also don't get why 5 Campbell soup cans lined up next to each other (black bean, corn, and my favorite, tomato) is considered art. Sorry, Andy Warhol fans.


3.) Lot of portraits and self-portraits. A lot of painters seem to be pretty narcissistic, painting portraits of themselves and showing themselves in a pretty good light (See: Rembrandt). My question is, does it really take that much artistic ability to take a portrait of someone? I've seen artists in the park draw caricatures of their subjects that show more creativity than some of those portraits. Sure they look really nice, but shouldn't any artist worth their salt be able to draw a person in detail?

4.) bad reception in the art gallery (probably on purpose) forces you to concentrate on viewing the art.

5.) What I've always wondered- how long is a casual art viewer supposed to "view the art?" I see a painting, I absorb for about 5 seconds, see all the various facets if there are multiple subjects, figure out what it's about, and I move on. Sometimes if I'm feeling generous I read the captions which to be fair gives some good info sometimes (who knew Degas was really into washerwomen and ballet dancers?) but after that I'm on to the next one. Is there some sort of deep meaning I'm supposed to be looking for? Trying to figure out the warm and dark hues of the color formation?

6.) What I do like about art museums: (Yay!) I like that I can walk hand-in-hand with my girlfriend around and enjoy the visual images as well as the feeling of bonding and romance while doing so. It's a nice pace, like we're doing it together, which allows me to stay for the activity a lot longer than if I was going to an art museum alone (it's like a sprint). I like that she likes art (very cheesy I know but I appreciate her!) I also like the gardens and the nice atmosphere of art museums: they have nice, clean buildings with clean restrooms, usually a pound, fountain, or statues outside, and there's usually some sort of garden to give the outdoor feel as well. Not a bad consolation prize even if I can't tell Monet from Manet.


All in all, I appreciate wealthy investors like J. Paul Getty and Norton Simon in LA (check out their art museums!) who donated their money and their art so that others could appreciate art, but to borrow a Chinese proverb, it's like playing piano to a bull to me (it's lost on me). Now on to watching the "new Guiness World record for human mattress dominoes" on facebook.

Purchase (購入する)

It's the American Dream for many immigrants who come to the US and most people around the world: To purchase a home. A home, is, after all: where the family lives: it's the basis of one's life, where one can call home. One's life hasn't really "stabilized" if one hasn't purchased a home. 

Recently, I've been considering purchasing a home: It's not going to be a very big home, it's going to require a 30-year mortgage that feels like a set of shackles, but I still want to do it. For the past few months, though, I've been using a popular refrain that I'm sure many people who aren't sure if they want to purchase say: "Maybe later." 

I've always dreaded making big purchase items like cars, houses, secondary education. Stories of how popel got defrauded and their whole life savings are wasted come to mind; and they're usually done through middle men like car salesmen, real estate agents, and in the case of secondary education, school ambassadors who try to convince students to invest in the school (I once applied for a position like that at USC Law, they didn't take me nor should they have given what I think about law schools, but I also didn't fit the "profile" of what they were looking for). It's the reason people avoid going to malls and instead shop online like at Amazon.com: no one wants to talk to pushy salesmen or live people who are trying to convince you to buy something. I'll make up my own mind, thank you, and not submit to the inherent pressure of a purchase. 

Buying a house, incidentally, is such a big commitment to one's lifestyle: it settles where one will be living, how one commutes to work, what kind of friends one has, what road one takes most of the time, what neighborhood that person runs through (especially important for me), it's one of the biggest decisions one makes that determines one's life (other than maybe finding a spouse or deciding to have a child, maybe). Sure one can still rent out the house or sell it eventually, but in generally once one has bought, one is kind of "stuck" with it. For a nomadic, like-to-see-new-places guy like me, it's not the ideal scenario, even though the alternative of throwing money down the drain of renting places is not very appealing neither. So until the Southern California prices come down a little bit or I move to a new city because of work, the answer to purchasing a new house has to be: "Maybe later." 

Fantasize on, 

Robert Yan