In this most recent update on Bobby’s dating life, we bring you the dreaded “I’m gonna stop using Match.com from now on.
1.) Guys have to pay. I went on a “benefits of online dating” news article and read that women like to use online dating because they get a free meal/drink or something out of it, so “the registration fee pays for itself.” So, basically, guys have to do double-fee? Especially in this gender-neutral world we live in, that’s somewhat unfair, and the social balance that we experience in the real world should extend to dating, in my opinion. I’m not saying that girls just sign up for online dating to get free dates, but it certainly is not a nice benefit to have.
2. ) The whole “not responding to emails as a form of rejection” is irksome. Like some girls will wait a whole week before they get back to me. Yes, I know you are talking to other people. Yes, I know when some of those other contacts don’t work out I’m the “second choice.” But could you get back to me a little sooner? Especially when in online dating a no-response is equivalent to a “no.”
3.) You don’t really get to know a person. Usually when you go on a date with someone, you’ve known that person from somewhere and actually LIKE that person, which is why you proposed the date /accepted the date in the first place. Going on an online date, you really have almost no idea if you’ll like that person, it’s almost a total stab in the dark (you know what their profile says and limited information based on online conversation), so you can be stuck talking to someone who is a fine person to talk to, but have no chemistry (or worse, someone you despise). This is probably the biggest issue with online dating: it’s a giant world out there, and to meet someone and actually develop chemistry is really hard, and in my opinion, pretty rare, and unless you’re a supermodel or a very good-looking person (which, to be honest, if you’re using online dating, chances are you’re not- I admit I’m not) then the personality compatibility stuff becomes REALLY important, and often it’s not there.
4.) Even after a few dates, you might still not know. You don’t know how they’ll be like to be in a relationship with for a few weeks, a few months, a few years. I know my friends for at least 3 years now, I know exactly what they’re like, I know if they can change, and I know I can rely on them to be my friends. The first 3 dates with someone, they can be really nice, really cool, someone who you might think you could EVENTUALLY get in a relationship with, but there’s no guarantee that’s gonna happen.
5.) Meeting people for the first time ALL THE TIME. So as a result of the previous 4 problems, one usually goes back to the well and have to start the process all over again, and you go to that first date only knowing the barest amount of information about a person, you have to go through your whole spiel again, you have to go through the process and try to develop something. It’s really tiring and makes one sometimes go, “can’t someone just like me for who I am?”
At least it is for me. Sigh.
5.) Finally, probably the No. 1 thing I dislike about online dating..........the feeling of self-doubt you feel one you've been "rejected." Why even total strangers won't take a liking to you.....makes you evaluate who you are in life, what I have to do to improve myself, what I did wrong during the date, etc. It's not a great feeling, and makes one wonder.
The foregoing is not a problem in fantasy baseball. First all, I'm great at fantasy baseball and I know it, so the foregoing is not a problem. You know all about a player before you “date them,” their birthdate, their career stats, their wikipedia page, what team they played for. Lots of information out there that you can know exactly what you’re getting when you reach out and date them. And when you draft them, they don’t say no or just don’t respond to your emails…….they actually perform, unless they get hurt (looking at you, Hanley Ramirez).
Fantasy baseball players who I might want to have a summer romance with this year:
1.) Jimmy Rollins: one last flame, value’s never been lower.
2.) Brandon Belt: very intriguing first baseman.
3.) Brett Lawrie: Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me 5 times………
Btw, I won a significant amount of jelly beans at a Super Bowl party playing squares (a popular game, google it if you don’t know). All luck, but it’s a great feeling to win random chance!
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
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