Sunday, November 12, 2023

Taylor Swift (泰勒斯威夫特, テイラー・スウィフト, 테일러 스위프트)

 Nothing makes me feel old more than spending a day with my sister, who's part of another generation apparently even though she's just 9.5 years younger than me. She has multiple tattoos, is into the most recent social media news, supports Palestine 100% in the most recent Gaza conflict, still keeps in contact with her college friends, and has the very 1970's attitude of "don't trust anyone over 30." (Wonder what happens when she turns 30? She doesn't trust herself anymore?) The most noticeable thing she does that separates her from me most clearly, though, is her undying love for Taylor Swift. 

Have you heard of Taylor Swift? She's only anywhere and everywhere you look. I looked up her name in different languages, and yup, she's famous enough to have a specific translation in all the key languages. International superstar who is probably more the face of America than anyone in America rigth now, including Joe Biden, Donald Trump, Elon Musk, and a host of other candidates. She played "kingmaker" to Travis Kelce, a formally successful tight end for the Kansas City Chiefs but unknown outside of the sports world, who has suddenly become the most famous famous sports star in teh world and transcnding sports by dating Taylor and having her show up to the games. Football fans have been complaining that the telecasts featuring the Chiefs cut to Taylor in her box seats more than the game itself. Superlative, superlative, superltive, Taylor has lived up to all those superlatives. 

My sister went to watch the Eras Tour concert film today in theaters; I abstained from spending time in the theater, but on Netflix I'm watching the Renaissance Tour concert film from 2018 (before her mega-mega-star status, when was just a mega-star). 

1.) Some questions: How does she not sweat through all her outfits and makeup after dancing so actively? She really gives it all in her performances, but she looks fresh the whole way through 3 hours of concert action...she has costume changes, sure, but I'd be sweating my ass off........it's not like she has a private shower backstage. Magic. 

2.) She's 33 turning 34 in December. Are Taylor and Travis going to make a baby soon? That baby will likely be the most discussed baby in the history of the world, eclipsing Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's babies, Kim Kardashian's babies, the Jon + Kate babies, the Octomom babies, Baby Jesus, etc. 

3.) Does she write all of her own songs? If so, she's the Moazart of her generation, a virtuoso who generates hit after hit after hit, where she played 30+ songs during her live performances but people like my sister still got "super salty" (yes, that word makes me feel old too) that she didn't include certain songs out of the 100+ hit songs she's ever had. 

4.) If Taylor ever performed at the halftime show for a Super Bowl, it migth be the most watched event ever, not just of Super Bowls. She definitely has the stage presence for it, and her shows have the entertainment quality for it, with massive props (like giant snakes, drummers baging on gong drums, half-naked dancers (both men and women), strobe lights, etc., etc.) I have to say she'd probably be better than pregnant Rihanna in the last halftime performance (unpopular opinion I guess). 

5.) I've never been to a Swiftie concert of course, but I imagine that watching it from home in the comfrot of my own couch and big-screen TV is a more pleasant experience than paying upwards of 4-digit prices (per ticket!) to go to a stadium to sit in the nosebleeds, wearing adult diapers (apparently fans this summer reported wearing them to not take bathroom breaks so they didn't miss a thing). It's just like UFC events, any sports events, really: you get to see more not going live. This is the old geezer Bobby Yan talking though: the film had close-up shots of fans who were pleased as punch, screaming their heads off when Taylor came onstage for the first time, shedding tears throughout the performance and when Taylor was speaking, holding up lights while the lights went dark, and I'm sure shouting the lyrics of the songs as Taylor was singing throughout along with 50,000 other screaming fans. Sounds stressful for me; heaven for others. 

6.) She has very quotable lyrics and catch phrases, like "Shake it off, shake it off." Also "Cruel Summer" (also title of a different song by Bananarama, "You Belong with Me." "I don't know about you, but I'm feeling 22." (For me, it's soon to be I'm feeling 42). And of course, the one I say to my sister everytime I see her: "I knew you were trouble when you walked in....." surprised that one hasn't made it into the cultural zeitgeist: it's a classic. 


MJ and I just want to go see U2 in Las Vegas's new Sphere theater, Achtung Baby Live. 

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