The concept of "身在福中不知福" is really coming into play nowadays with the coronavirus, meaning "you grow up in happiness but don't know happiness, or you don't know how good you have it unless it's gone. Suddenly without an office to go to and co-workers to talk to, the day-to-day life seems dull, bland, and devoid of social interaction, one of the main things that human beings thrive upon. Sure some lucky portion of Americans still have jobs and can work remotely, but it's not the same as the office experience, and also you don't have one of the more universal parts of the work culture: going to a company dinner, usually on Friday night after the hard work week is over.
I wouldn't say I'm a huge proponent of the concept of a company dinner; I personally would like to just check out of my work mode and have some personal time after 8 hours a day (probably more than that because of the lunch break and sometimes overtime) and have "me" time, rather than spend it with people you already see at least 40 hours a week, 5 times a day anyway. (I've contemplated many times how I spend more time with co-workers than my wife or my family, which is mitigated by the fact I switch jobs and co-workers every few months, but some career people have the same officemates for years and decades on end!). Then again, I've also seen companies bring a group of 20 people or so to a dodgeball league and have fun together, which I fully support as a team building exercise.
The Korean company dinner has a special term ("hoesik") and it is an extreme version of American company outings, first of which is that employees feel pressured to go to them and drink a lot, like soju or beer. It's an established part of the company culture, and it's how new employees receive advice from higher ups, and some even feel like they're betraying the company by not going. Especially in Asian cultures like Japan and Korea where employees work for the same company their whole life and know that going in, it's important to go to these, show respect, and develop relationships. There's the standard routine of having samgyupsal (barbeque pork belly) with a drink, and rounds and rounds of alcohol, and maybe some karaoke (called noraebang in Korean) later. I imagine MJ would not have liked the company dinner culture if she worked in Korea, just from the food items and forced nature of the conversations. There's other etiquette like you have to hold he cup of soju that someone pours for you with 2 hands, you should look away from the person pouring, etc., etc., and people telling you to stay longer. (But you're expected to still show up to work the next day on time if it's a work day!)
In America there's definitely less company pressure, like your job depends on it, especially if you have kids at home or some other obligations. I have definitely went to company dinners, though, and they seem relatively tame, leave when you want. I just find it clumsy and time-wasting to go to a bar and talk about random chatter on a Friday night (so you normally wouldn't have to go to work the next day) , and would much prefer a Friday lunch where everyone needs to take a lunch break anyway. Just the idea of always needing a beer or some form of alcohol in your hand to appear engaged, along with trying to avoid people who you don't really want to talk to. MJ's nursing program has these type of gatherings; I do miss some of the law school gatherings because there was a sense of being all in the same boat and around the same age; company gatherings tend to divide people based on status (if you're the boss), age, and the sense that people come to work just to collet a paycheck anyway. When I worked in New York city, it was easy to go to a bar after work and just take the subway home or walk home, but Los Angeles parties also have the added element of what to do with your car, depending on if you drove to work that morning. There have been some valuable information gleaned during the course of a company dinner of Happy Hour, as employees tend to speak more freely about issues, and also some people go to develop camaraderie or even flirt with someone at the office, and it can be useful for celebrating someone's birthday although I find that just getting a birthday cake around 3:00PM and not imposing on people's precious weekend time is better.
All in all, I wasn't a big fan of the idea, but it's funny how even some of the so-so experiences seem like they were happy and boisterous when we're all stuck at home without much social interaction at all. I start wishing I had taken advantage of those opportunities of hilarity and merriness more.
Fantasize on,
Robert Yan
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