The Midwest (中西部, 중서부)

 The American Midwest: ridiculed by the rest of the country as "Flyover States," they always occupied a soft spot in my heart as the region where I grew up, from 5 years old all throughout college at University of Illinois. 

Anyone who knows me knows I'm not a "get the biggest hyped item" kind of guy, I'm more of a "find the hidden steals that others have discarded kind of guy." Cincinnati, Ohio is one of those discarded places that I find has some real value (even though I've only been there on brief stints, staying in the city just a few hours each time). Forget the "3 Rivers City" of Pittsburgh, Cincinnati is on the corner of 3 states of Indiana, Ohio, and Kentucky, driving over the John Roebling bridge will get you into Kentucky. It has free Sunday admissions to all of its art museums, of which they're a little small if you're comparing to the Met in New York or the National Mall but still reasonable considering the population that it's serving, and the people at the museums were.....believe it or not, friendly. MJ and I wandered out into the "event session area" of the William Howard Taft Museum of Art (yes, that Taft, the 27th president and Supreme Court justice) and had to back out when we realized we'd gone to the real place and came face to face with a museum worker who began to pull out something, presumably to give us a warning or something......only to find out he was giving us a business card to call the museum if we were interested in having a wedding there. He thought we were looking for wedding venues! How thoughtful (even though we live hundreds of miles away). Quaint is a good word for Cincinnatti....also, underrated baseball stadium, right on the Ohio River facing into the stream, well situated, huge facility: if only there had a good team. 

Columbus, Indiana is one of the hidden gems of the Midwest (btw, yes Ohio is a Midwest state, although it's pushing into the east a bit if you ask me, bordering both Pennsylvania and West Virginia. NOT Columbus Ohio, which bothered me when MJ and I walked around the campus of "THE" Ohio State University, 2 days before THE big loss to Michigan. To encourage student spirit they'd crossed out all the M's on all the street signs and building signs around campus, all in an attempt to get riled up for the big game. That's like one of those "don't change underwear" or "don't step on sidewalk cracks" superstitions: it had zero effect on OSU's chances of winning, and it just felt over the top. 

Columbus, Indiana, on the other hand, is a great architectural town with pieces done by Eero Saarinen, has father Eliel Saarinen, with various churches, bridges, factories, libraries, even detention centers ("The nicest looking jail in the world!" one fellow tourist on our tour exclaimed). The crowning achievement was the Miller House tour, designed by Saarinen that just had such interesting features within the house with huge glass windows and  backyard that would make any kid jealous of all the space in the back. An architect's dream and masterpiece. 

Something about places like Bloomington, Indiana- college towns in the middle of the Midwest (nowhere) with its own vibe and college town mystique (and Mies Van der Rohe buildings!) that makes me want to go back to college again. And Jimmy John's! Happy college students still get to experience the wonderful culinary tradition that is a Jimmy John's store, with all the classic menu items still intact. 

Mental Math (心算, 정신 수학, 暗算)

 Since I was a young kid, and with full credit to my late grandpa, I have been (comparatively) good at mental arithmetic, being able to do simple math calculations in my head. As long as it didn't involve algorithms, calculus, or any other higher level of mathematics, I was really good it. My grandpa helped me memorize the times tables early on, then I moved on to fractions, solving for x, squares and square roots... I was always a bit ahead of everyone else in my math class, fueling my pompous attitude of thinking I was smarter than others, when in fact I was just fast at one of the most basic functions of math, but one that does still have a bit of practical function, fortunately. I learned all squares (like square root of 21 is 441, 22 is 484, 23 is 529, etc., when I was bored in 6th grade. (Epilogue: After about 8th grade, I realized my math abilities weren't actually that great, and got my butt kicked in advanced math classes in college) 

It all paid off for me today in Jeopardy, when they brought back an old favorite (OK, one of MY old favorites: "Do the math," the category where contestants tried to do mental math on the fly. All 3 struggled, with 14-day Chris Pannullo, who in the same game answered tough brain-busters like "improved explosive devices = IED" or the Roman goddess of vengeance was named "Nemesis," nonetheless tried and failed to come up with the 2 toughest clues, what is the value of y when y=x+1 crosses the y axis, and 12% of 75 is.........Admittedly these were not the easiest clues ever, but anyone worth mental math salt should have been able to get it within 5 seconds. The other 2 contestants didn't even ring in to try. On many occasions I've heard the same sentiments expressed by lawyers: "I became a lawyer so I didn't have to do math" or by people of the general populace, "I'm terrible at math." Seems like one of those skills like tying shoelaces or unplugging a toilet that you just have to learn as a kid, and it rewards you over and over in life. And like many things in life, it requires many repetitions, mental exercises, and just effort to actually learn it, a sentiment that has deteriorated due to computers and phone technology evolving so much that we have a calculator in our pocket anywhere to go. 

If I ever become a teacher, I've wondered what subject I would prefer to teach: Foreign language? Social studies (I am a lawyer and loved history), but often I would circle back to math. At least I would know what the right answers are (as opposed to history, where people argue about the real facts all the time), and I was once good at the subject......except, was I a little too good? I feel like I might have a natural gift at doing mental math in my head, something not all students are equipped with, and I might struggle at teaching students on a basic level when I learned it pretty quickly on my own just because I "got it." Not everyone had a great teacher like my grandpa at home teaching me this stuff at a young age! 

Sweet Tooth (단것을 좋아하기, 甘党)

 "Sweet tooth" is one of many genius phrases in the English language, a neologism (newly coined word) that lets the listener know exactly what the speaker means in just 2 basic words, even giving a visual representation of it as well. Surprisingly, the phrase was coined in the Middle Ages, as even back then human beings must have discovered how great sweet things were. 

MJ's nurse friend recently gave us a a gift of cake and cupcakes and mentioned that she likes to bake and has a sweet tooth. Nothing inherently wrong about this and it was very nice of her to gift us food, but I cringe just at the idea of a sweet tooth, of the image of someone gorging on sweet candies on Halloween, of forgoing other food to have sweet items. It may be because I'm a reformed sugar-eater and realize what it does to our bodies, as well as the truth of diminished returns once you've had the first few bites of sweet stuff. Sugar really has one taste, with many incarnations, levels, and they no doubt all taste good. I find that too easy: just give kids some candy and they'll be happy; well yea sugar is reliably yummy for people, but it's also one of the foods that makes your body crave more, making you slave to it. There's no sophistication to sugar, no subtleness, it's just BOOM in-your-face sweetness; other dishes have much more nuance and layers of taste involved that only a developed palate can appreciate. 

Sugar is like a legal drug; it just hasn't been categorized as an addiction. Not to sound too hoity-toity, but I find non-sugar tastes to be much more superior than sweetness: bitterness, savory, salty, sour, spicy, even tasteless vegetables (and TOFU! see previous article) have a freshness to them that makes me feel good about myself and know that it's not going to make me feel sick if I eat too much of it, unlike unreasonable levels of candy that can just leave a pit in my stomach. I learned early on in my sports "career" not to have sugar right before doing any physical activities as it gives just a short burst of energy before crashing.....the negative effects of sugar are right up there with alcohol... just a hangover if you're lucky, or that "sugar rush" feeling that dissipates quickly. There's also the aftereffects of sugar to one's breath: that sour taste in your mouth after sugar that you feel like you need to wash out, I would just rather stick with the neutral foods that don't have the upside of the sweet foods that make you feel good for 30 seconds of mouth pleasure but then gradually feel worse, to the rock steady staple foods, like a McDonald's or Apple stock that just stay on a slow upward trajectory rather than the zigzagging motion of an Amazon or Tesla that could go up quickly but crash down (FINALLY I'm learning that stocks are like a diet- stick with the reliable and healthy companies). 

Also, the idea of a "sweet tooth" makes me cringe because the physical aspect of sweet stuff sticking to the gums and causing....tooth decay, bringing a whole new definition to that term. 

If I were to have a New Year's Resolution, that's what I'd do: lay off the sweet stuff. Rely only on fruits for sources of sugar. No artificial sugars. I know, very hard to do and a little unrealistic to avoid all sweet stuff altogether, and it makes off limits all the hyped-up food society has deemed to be the tastiest: doughnuts, candy, cake, ice cream, pies, cupcakes, and one of the biggest ones people cannot go without: chocolate. 

Earwax (耳垢, 귀지)

Reader, you might want to skip this one if you don't have a strong stomach. Definitely not around any meal times.  

One of the questions that comes up often on applications or group activities, icebreakers, etc. is the question, "What is a hidden talent that you have?" I have a hard time responding to this because there's really no good answer; I can talk about dodgeball maybe, but others can't relate to that so it won't mean anything, if I say how smart I am or something others will think I'm boasting, and I'm really not that talented (no cooking talent, no cool yoga move showing how flexible I am, not a good singer, etc.) I've always been tempted to give a cheeky response, which is that "I am great at growing earwax." It's true- more than one ear doctor has remarked that "I'm a wax factory," or "I got potatoes," or some admiration/condemnation of my ability to have earwax that accumulates so much it blocks my hearing. I went about 10 years this last stretch without going to a doctor by using store-bought solutions to clean it out, but it wasn't sufficient. When I finally went to a doctor, they dug in once, twice, then in an unprecedented maneuver, made me lie down outside the office for 10 minutes to let the solution dilute the earwax enough to let them in, that's how much of a backup there was. But when the infringing blockage finally came out? I felt so much better, like a weight was lifted and I could hear everything again. I've come to realize that that maybe a source of irritation for me, much like the earwax itself the stress of having this hearing issue builds up and then makes me cranky. It also contributes to my loud voice because I can't even hear myself speak, which makes others think I'm yelling. I guess what I'm saying is, to any other excessive earwax sufferers out there, go get checked out, don't be embarrassed. I was the same way about acne; I was so ashamed of myself I didn't address the problem early on; finally that went away. And honestly? Cleaning it out feels pretty good; no wonder people in Japan pay maid cafes to do it for them regularly. 

I've learned a lot about the Bible this past year after never having studied at all in my previous 34 years of life, quite a weird thing if you consider that I've lived most of those years in America and had plenty of Christian friends, and even in the Chinese American community there are groups with strong faith to Christianity. I sympathize with people who have strong faith to Christianity, they are stronger and more devoted than I am, that's for sure. I also watched the documentary "Religolous" by Bill Maher satirizing Christianity and most organized religions, and I can see it from his side. Coming from a third-person view of religion since I was never raised with it and never felt like religion was a big part of my life, the Bible does seem a little fairy-tale-ish, more of a story than a guidebook on how to lead one's life. In my mind the stories of Bible are like the stories of Shakespeare, some tragedies, some inspiring stories, some historical accounts of real life people, but importantly the Bible was written by people and have the people element to it, which means they also have human flaws in them. I don't dislike religion and in fact think a lot of people do need religion, as long as it's a healthy devotion and not an unhealthy fanaticism that's used to raise money for the wrong people, fight wars by the wrong people. The problem, again, with something as pure and well-intentioned as religion is people; people manipulating religion ruins the purity of it, and I wish we could all believe in some true morals and higher truths than the distorted version that human-interpreted religion has been packaged to us. 

Tofu, the Superfood

 Recently MJ made a seaweed soup, or a miyeokguk in Korean, typically eaten by Koreans on their birthday but also women who are nursing injuries, apparently. The soup was delicious with mushrooms and green onions (or was it scallions? I am rarely able to tell the difference). But then on the SECOND meal as leftovers, we added tofu, a food that is quickly becoming the most consumed food I've ever had (it's definitely risen in the ranks in the last 2 years as a staple). (Fun fact: Illinois's No. 1 crop is not corn, it's the.....soybean). Tofu is such a versatile addition to so many dishes: salty dishes, spicy dishes, soups, fried foods... it doesn't really have much taste in itself, so it mixes well with others, and it has a smooth texture of meat, so much so that at Costco I just move right by the meat aisle and grab the big box of tofus as my protein. Also for soups such as miyeokguk, the tofu sucks in the salt and deliciousness of the soup and spreads out the richness. I never had an answer to the question "if you were a food, what would you be?" (I think most people say like ice cream or something because it's sweet, or a banana for Asian people because they're yellow on the outside, white on the inside?) I'd like to be a tofu because I'm not like a star by myself (even in conversations I need to feed off of other people's conversations to be funny or interesting, I don't tell good stories from scratch!) I mix well with others, and I can enhance a group and be the missing piece to a solid plate of food, without risk of ruining it. I am what I eat, a tofu! 

I've been cramming so many facts in my brain recently that I often find myself forgetting some things I've thought I'd mastered, and I'm worried that there's a toothpaste effect of new knowledge cramming out the new knowledge while the tube (brain in this analogy) doesn't get any bigger. But I'm pretty sure I haven't written about the last complete fiction book I read, "Animal Farm" by George Orwell (aka Eric Blair, one of these fancy guys who needed a code name). I read the whole thing on an overseas trip from Korea back to US (I feel like I was the only one reading a book on the plane, everyone else was either sleeping or watching Top Gun: Maverick, the No. 1 plane movie this year) but I just breezed through the 141-pager (not enough big juicy pages of text, really a quick read). Thoroughly enjoyable knowing now that it was a parody on the Soviet Union's leadership with Stalin, Trotsky, and Karl Marx/ Lenin in the joint role of Old Major, the pig that dies in the end. Orwell certainly has a way of packing a punch right away with the animal metaphors by choosing pigs for the leaders, but so many of the events within Animal Farm remind me of parallels of today's society, even in the free-market and capitalist U.S..... to me Animal Farm is not about the horrors of bad communism, it's about the horrors of bad leadership. The 7 tenants of animals that were set forth almost all get wiped out at the end including "four legs good, two legs bad," the leaders re-writing history and blaming previous administrations for things and turning heroes into villains, those in power constantly wanting more and more and taking from the rest of the people to enrich themselves. Orwell is so masterful at pinpointing the human condition and infusing it into these animals, especially the greed: human beings are all so greedy, myself included, from the drug-addicted people on the streets wanting more drugs to the white-collar executives always craving more money (case in point: FTX founder Sam Bankman-Fried), people in power wanting more power (Donald Trump seeking more attention and power by declaring his candidacy for the 2024 election). History just keeps re-writing itself over and over again, and it's ironic that people don't read the prophetic books decades ago by Orwell and Huxley but instead focus on all the other distractions in the world, therefore fulfilling the prophecy that those authors envisioned. Oh, and also, it's just a good book reads well, good dialogue, lessons in morality and humanity, heartbreaking ending (spoiler alert) where Boxer the horse dies (Disney's formula of a sad ending when an animal dies). 

Luddite (反对改进工作方法的人)

 I have discussed my Luddite inclinations before (destroying of machinery, opposing new technologies), and I still harbor doubts of whether technology is a net good for society (medicinal and engineering technology for sure, but Tiktok technology? Likely not good. It's surprising and a little discouraging for the future of society when I hear stats like 2 out of every 3 members of GenZ are on TikTok.....and when you're on TikTok, you watch a LOT of videos. I can't help but think that social media and TikTok are like what cigarettes were in the early 1900s without studies into its negative health effects, and I cringe at the emptiness of libraries while TikTok's cloud-based platforms are fully jammed. 

Speaking of libraries, I feel for libraries and the book industry in general (as well as newspapers and that nostalgic feeling of running my fingers across the text of a newspaper and the crisp page turn of opening up a newspaper) and try to subscribe to as many publications/ periodicals as feasible without doing financial damage. Libraries are trying to dissipate all the information it can into the world, but now it's butting heads against the book publishers of the world because libraries are doing too good a job, especially with E-books, where they lend them out to patrons who can get the book for free without paying for it, and essentially follow that plan without ever having to pay for a book. The obvious problem with that is the publishers don't get paid for these books, and that trickles up to the writer/author writing the book, they don't get paid neither, and pretty soon no one wants to write a book (although Kim Kardashian, Stanley Tucci, and all celebrities still get pretty good traction from their memoirs and other media, another example that it pays to be famous). I can personally attest that I am discouraged from buying books (1. because I live a frugal life but also) because I can get all the books I need from the library, and then some; there's no way I'll ever finish everything I want to read, and the library just keeps popping up with brand new books, published 2022, that they stack at the entrance and other eye-catching areas. There's really no need ever to BUY a book unless I want my own personal copy; it'd better be a pretty special book then. Even a brand new bestseller, savvy library patrons get multiple library cards and join enough waitlists that they can probably get the book pretty soon after its release. Where's the money in the book industry? 

I've also heard that China's algorithms for Tiktok are much difficult than that of the U.S......China's algorithms reward science and technology education, whereas the U.S. rewards.....junk is the best I can describe it. There's definitely something to be said for TikTok as the ultimate brainwashing device, and there's a non-zero chance TikTok will be banned in the US eventually, giving Meta stock (Facebook) a huge boost that they so desperately need after failing in its initial foray into the Metaverse. But if it's not TikTok, it'll likely be another social media forum that replaces it... once the kids are hooked on the technology, there's no going back! I once did a charity drive with a chicken sandwich chain in downtown LA whose grand opening was let's say, not well received due to its stance on gay marriage, but during that charity drive we donated books to children with the ability to leave a note in the books to future readers: mine was "Books are better than Ipads." I still believe it to be true, as the empty reading rooms I go to in the library demonstrate. 

If I had won that $2.09 billion Powerball lottery this past Tuesday, I would have dedicated some to the book industry! That lucky person from Altadena, CA, if you're reading this (the chances of you reading this are likely slimmer than the chances you had of winning the lottery), the book industry needs your help! Or just buy out TikTok (or a significant portion of it and divert the younger generation back to books, the way they it was in the 1990's, the best era for human life in history!)

Waiting Room (等候室, 待合室, 대기실)

 I recently learned that one of Florida's many nicknames (Sunshine state, The Orange State, the Everglade State, etc.) is "God's Waiting Room," a fitting reference to all the retirement villages and retirement-age population in Florida. Of all the places in the world, the hospital waiting room has to be one of the more representative/symbolic.....you're just waiting there on news of a loved one who is being attended to, and it feels like life is hanging in the balance. 

I've never had surgeries or needed any extended visits to a hospital (I guess since I was born), the only things being to see dermatologists, orthodontists, dentists, and ear doctors (for earwax issues!) so I've been lucky enough not to need anyone to be in the waiting room waiting for me, but I've been in the waiting room awaiting news for a loved one plenty of times, including today. It's different for a non-life-threatening issue, but still it's a bit of a nerve-racking experience, seeing one's loved one wheeled out on a hospital bed to an unknown destination (presumably the operating room for surgery but I've never been inside an actual one!) and feeling helpless to help. I tried to keep my mind busy with plenty of books and my laptop to do work, but it's hard not to have worries related to why you're there, thinking of worst-case scenarios, and nowadays anxiously looking at one's phone to see if there are any updates through text about how the surgery is going. 

The waiting room itself is usually pretty crowded, full of other patients whose loved ones are in a similar position, everyone a little on edge as no one can be totally comfortable, and everyone would much rather be at home enjoying themselves than enduring a visit to a hospital, not to mention a unit that blocks off visitors from access to the main unit where the hospital beds are. Most people are there with their family members, but a few unlucky ones have come by themselves to get called to the back, like drawing the unlucky genetic straw or being afflicted with some unfortunate malady that has called them forth, a reverse lottery win (a $2.09 billion Power Ball lottery was just taken down by someone in the SoCal area, lucky guy/gal!). It must be pretty daunting to face the prospect of surgery or some other medical issue alone, and emotional support is pretty important, so in that sense the waiting room reflects a system of love and support, but on a more practical level the people there to give the patient a ride home after their visit. 

One of the most tenuous moments was when my Mom went in for tumor-removing surgery last year, and to prepare for the worst the family had gathered around and discussed wills, funds, in the event of the unexpected. That's when it becomes very real, and the waiting room becomes a pressure cooker of really hoping nothing bad happens, but feeling helpless because it's all out of one's hands. We can live our lives to the fullest all other times, but when we're in the waiting room the realization of how fragile we are and how tenuous life is comes crashing down like a ton of bricks. 

So it's not just Florida, we humans are all in a proverbial God's waiting room of sorts- just waiting for that time when God (or whoever it is responsible for us all) doesn't allow us to put it off anymore. Until then, here's hoping for more successful (but less frequent) hospital and waiting room trips. 

Poetry (诗歌, 詩, 시)

 Poetry, the red-headed step child of literature, glossed over by myself in high school and I'm sure plenty of others out there. It's just not a medium that connects with Americans, and that was before the advent of iPhones and TikTok to further distract us. 

But why though? Poetry is short (generally, although some poems can be quite lengthy) and packs its messages into a concise and condensed package....in this day and age where attention spans are razor thin, that should be a good thing. The issue is...I just never understood poetry! I got the most basic levels of rhyme and meter, but what makes good poetry? Why are some poems better than others? I was always in it for the storytelling, and in a Harry Potter world I defaulted to the "Harry, Ron, and Hermione walked into Gringotts" type of storytelling than the dense bush of poetry. China actually has a vast expanse of poetry with famous poets like Li Bai and Du Fu, and my grandpa did me a great service to make me memorize some of the most famous poems back when I was like 7 years old (the best time to memorize things because they stick with you forever), so I have this one poem by Li Bai that's become my default, so rhythmically pleasing in Chinese to say but filled with messages. 

Poems are also like famous songs in that they're lyrics....people love songs! Which aren't that much different than poems, except for the whole music part. Perhaps I'll join a poetry slam at some point to witness poetry in motion. Perhaps I'll discover some mystic secret about poems that can reveal why they have such a strong place in the history of writing. Until then, I just don't understand poetry yet. Maybe it's like fine wine (don't really like the test of alcohol personally), but maybe as I grow even older (I feel like I'm at a pretty ripe age already) I'll understand, kind of like understanding melancholy and bitterness along with the sweetness of life. 

Segue to tonight's Final Jeopardy question, about a famous poet who was born in Maine. Difficult question, but one that should have been narrowed down to at least a few New England poets (known as the fireside poets) based on the year of 1813, and then go with the best guess of them around that time period, the incomparable WILLIAM WADSWORTH LONGFELLOW. The guy should be the first poet every American thinks of (Europe has some famous ones like Lord Byron, Tennyson, and Coleridge, not to mention Sappho going in the way-back machine), but we Americans are more culturally conversant with Robert Frost, Emily Dickinson, and on a much more recent and "fun" level, Dr. Seuss (I do not like green eggs and poetry, Sam I am). But it's encouraging that poetry still survives, despite not being celebrated too often, but pulled out famously at presidential inaugurations (Amanda Gorman's "The Hill We Climb" at Biden's inauguration comes to mind, as well as Maya Angelou's "On the Pulse of Morning" at Clinton's inauguration). Glad to see a world without poetry is "The Road Not Taken." 

朝 辞 白 帝 彩 云 间
千 里 江 陵 一 日 还。                                                                                         

两 岸 猿 声 啼 不 尽

轻 舟 已 过 万 重 山